Ask William Shatner

At long last William Shatner has volunteered himself to be strapped into the Slashdot Interviewee Victim Chair. You know the gig: Post your questions for the man, the moderators do their thing, and in a week or so we post the answers. So here's your chance to ask questions to the star of Iron Chef USA, Miss Congeniality and TJ Hooker!

MY ...GOD....MAN!!!!!

[fataugie]

Where did you go to school for acting?

Speech

[TiMac]

Why...do...you...talk...so.........slowly?

Settle it once and for all!

[breon.halling]

Do you think you take Patrick Stewart in a fight? =)

question

[Anonymous Coward]

Mr. Shatner, do you ever participate in sexual role playing with your wife, with you as James T. Kirk or T.J. Hooker? What roles does your wife play?

What if...

[Anonymous Coward]

Wil Wheaton asks William Shatner questions on SLASHDOT?! It'd be like... Slashdot: Generations! My head might explode!

How do you feel...

[KirkH]

...about being reponsible for the nickname 'captain' being given to all of us named Kirk in real life?

Gotta ask

[Tablizer]

Who bagged more babes in the 60's, you or Roddenberry?

Do they let you use...

[scrod98]

the Priceline.com server? Judging from all those lights and monitors it must be wicked powerful!

Prediction - all questions will be modded +5 funny

[Jeppe Salvesen]

I predict all questions to William Shatner will be the ones modded +5 funny (unless +5 insightful due to Trekkie mindset).

What happened to all those tribbles??

[ledbetter]

Did you get to keep any tribbles? Or did they just burn them?

Enterprise IT policy

[melonman]

Does Starship Command run Open Source? How about the Klingons? I think we need to know who we should be rooting for.

Was he a doctor . . .

[Anonymous Coward]

or a bricklayer?

Getting a life...

[daeley]

When you said on episode #18739 of Saturday Night Live: 'Get a life ... will ya, people? I mean, for cryin' out loud, it's just a TV show.', were you really reprising 'Evil Kirk' as Phil Hartman's (RIP) character suggested or did your motivation run deeper than that, say to 'Amok Time' when you had to battle Spock? ;)

What ST captain would look best

[Hektor_Troy]

when bare-chested?

Kirk
Pickard
Sisco
Janeway
Archer

The new-guy-in-the-red-shirt formula

[iamwoodyjones]

Seriously who's idea was it to come up with the new-guy-in-the-red-shirt dies every time you, Bones, and Spock went to the surface?

Was it one of you guys or was it a writer? If so, which writer/writers was it?

Music Career

[MyHair]

Are you planning on releasing any new songs soon?

(Anyone ever heard him sing Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds?)

Priceline

[ISPTech]

Do you find the priceline commercials that you do just as annoying as we do? ;-)

Mr. Shatner..

[grub]

..how was the green chick?

William Shatner ...

[halftrack]

Who are you, really?

The Hair

[Anonymous Coward]

Is it real, fake, transplanted?

SNL skit

[runenfool]

Did you really mean those things you said in that famous SNL skit?

It took several years of therapy to get over those horrible comments.

Times change

[unicron]

Mr. Shatner,

Do you ever look back on your show with regard to how your character treated women and find it offensive? Kirk boinked anything with 2 legs and a pretty face, often pursuing them in a cave man-like fashion.

And if you didn't find it offensive, do you think you're cursed to have been born way too early and not had your chance to lay the kirk-mack down on 7 of 9? Hell, cursed my ass, God singled you out for that heinous joke.

Mr. Shatner..

[grub]

..is it true you were found performing a "Richard Gere" with a tribble during the filming of Trouble with the Tribbles

Thank you.

Did you ever feel that Star Trek had destroyed you

[captfi]

If so how did you get over it? Was it years of personal "therapy"? Or did you have an epiphany one day that brought you through?

Got a Song for Us?Please!

[flyneye]

Damn,you know its been a while since i saw you put out an album.I dearly treasure the old solo stuff you did and the duet with Leo Nimoy.Is there a techno,metal,industrial or rap album on the drawing board? I NEED Wild Bill Shatner to melt the voice coils in my speakers.Everytime i hear your "rocket man" i can feel it down in my spleen.PLEASE tell us theres more music in your soul and funk in your butt.

Re:How sad would you rate Trekkie fans ?

[viper21]

He would probably rate them:

-1 : Troll

-S

What is the purpose...

[Kurt Gray]

...of all these beeping lights and flashing buttons? That's all we have here are beeping lights and flashing buttons and no one knows what they're FOR and they're BEEPING and THEY'RE FLASHING AND BEEPING AND FLASHING AND BLINKING... I CAN'T STAND IT ANYMORE! Will there be an Airplane III?

Mr. Shatner...

[demozthenes]

...what are your thoughts on perhaps the most popular fanfiction slash pair around, Kirk x Spock? Is there any truth behind it, or are you going to spoil the dreams of thousands of fangirls the world over?

But seriously, though...

[artemis67]

What was the locker combination in episode 25 [jt.org] after you left your quarters the last time and opened your safe?

Stupid moron!

[Anonymous Coward]

You're mixing up "Star Wars", which is imaginary, with "Star Trek", which everybody knows is real!

That's like saying Superman can beat up Jesus! It's a total non-sequiter.

Re:Twilight Zone Re-Run???

[Anonymous Coward]

You know what was great? In his first appearance on 3rd from the Sun as the Big Giant Head, he tells John Lithgow's character Dick about the airplane flight he had, and he saw a creature on the wing! And Dick says "I saw that too!" It's hilarious since they both played that role (Lithgow in the movie).

Another of my favorite Twilight Zone episodes also stars Shatner. It has to do with a little fortune machine at a diner. Entertaining.

Re:What happened to all those tribbles??

[Anonymous Coward]

...except for the one that currently sits on top of his head.

Huh?

[Anonymous Coward]

I thought geeks who need to get a life were obsessed with Na ^H^H Wil Wheaton?

Re:What is the purpose...

[Lev13than]

It's beeping becuase the ship's computer just deleted his essay [ellenfeiss.net].

Bummer.

Anne Robinson

[defile]

Remember when you were elected weakest link by the rest of the Star Trek cast, and you put the moves on Anne Robinson? On the fineness scale of 1-10 where 1 is fine and 10 is supah-fine, where would you rate her?

Re:Getting a life...

[PunchMonkey]

When you said on episode #18739 of Saturday Night Live: 'Get a life ... will ya, people? I mean, for cryin' out loud, it's just a TV show.', were you really reprising 'Evil Kirk' as Phil Hartman's (RIP) character suggested or did your motivation run deeper than that, say to 'Amok Time' when you had to battle Spock? ;)

A wizard did it.

Re:And a follow-up, Mr. Shatner ...

[grub]

was she green ... um, everywhere?

It's a well known fact that all women are pink on the inside. I saw that on Nova a few weeks ago.. or maybe it was in Hustler magazine.. whatever..

Re:Two questions...

[DeadVulcan]

What was your personal favorite episode of the Original Star Trek series and why?

Oh, please. He's probably been asked this question a billion times. He'll probably give you some bullsh*t answer just because he's sick of it.

How about: What was your favourite T.J. Hooker episode, and why?

(Yes... this is a joke.)

Re:What ST captain would look best

[Anonymous Coward]

SEVEN OF NINE!

Ok, so not a captain, but come on, 7 of 9 barechested, do we really care if she's a captain?

Is it a wig?

[chegosaurus]

Ask him. Go on. I dare you. I double dare you.

Re:Enterprise IT policy

[Anonymous Coward]

Starship Command? Starship?! It's Starfleet Command!

And you have the nerve to post on Slashdot?

Re:What ST captain would look best

[irc.goatse.cx troll]

But dax wasnt captain. If we're going for non-captains to, T'Pol all the way.
proof for any disbelievers [maximonline.com]

Seriously...are we cool?

[CleverNickName]

Hey Bill,

Are we cool, or what? I mean, I always thought you didn't like me, but I had a good time with you at Weakest Link watching the World Series.

So are we cool, or was that just pre-game strategy?

Wil

Enterprise computers

[wxyze]

What operating system did the Enterprise run on? Was it UNIX-based, something totally new, or was it Windows 2300?

I figured the real reason the M-5 went nuts in "The Ultimate Computer" wasn't because of Dr. Richard Deystrom's psycho engrams, but because Microsoft has a habit of engineering incompatibilities with competitor's products. Also, Spock must have known when he asked the computer to calculate the absolute value of PI in "Wolf in the Fold" that only a Microsoft OS could be crippled by a runaway process like that.

Google search on shatner & wheaton

[roalt]

Funny,

If you search for "william shatner" "wil wheaton" in google, the first hit is ... indeed the WWDN T-shirt!

Can Wil send CmdrTaco a T-shirt so he can pass it on to Shatner during the interview?

Re:Enterprise IT policy

[questionlp]

I think we should be rooting the Borg and take them down, then we can open source the collective and their code. The Romulans can keep their closedness :)

Oh... you meant rooting *for*... I'd say the Q Continuum!

Re:Honestly, what do you think?

[CleverNickName]

...and seeing as how you are The Man, if you want one, you can have one. I'll even autograph it for you. ;-)

Re:The Transformed Man wasn't supposed to be "musi

[kevcol]

Wow- this is great! There are so many knowledgable Trek fans who know most of the answers from personal anecdotes that Shatner has talked about or that they witnessed at conventions that I won't even bother to wait for his replies!

No contest.

[Junior J. Junior III]

The knife would win.

Re:Honestly, what do you think?

[Hektor_Troy]

Which brings up the next question:

Would William Shatner appreciate a signed T-shirt from Wil Wheaton?

Would Wil Wheaton appreciate a signed T-shirt from William Shatner?

And if they were on Celebrety Boxing - who would win?

This is what I think about when I'm home alone and the TV is broken.

Blue chicks?

[Anonymous Coward]

Mr. Shatner,
Are blue skinned chicks pink inside?

Re:Enterprise IT policy

[Sri Lumpa]

Given how easy it is to take total control of the ship (at least in the following series, I haven't seen most of TOS) from any terminal I would say that it's pretty safe to say that they are using an MS derived system.

Re:Computer Simulations of You

[IshanCaspian]

I hate to break the news to you, but I don't think it'll be a problem...I think getting a virtual Liv Tyler is a bit higher on the priority list than Will Shatner.

There's more

[IPFreely]

Shatner was a guest on 3rd Rock From the Sun with Lothgow, and they both made references to that story.

Shatner gets off an airplane and comments how he thought he saw something outside on the wing. Lithgow says Yeah, the same thing happened to him.

For that and much more, it was all around one of the best 3rd Rock episodes.

Priceline.com

[dbretton]

Do you use priceline.com to book all of your flights?

Or do you no longer fly due to the whole "There's something out on the wing!!" thing?

LOL!

[Ender Ryan]

Wil Wheaton asking William Shatner a question on a /. interview! Like another poster said, it's like "/.: Generations".

This is just too funny.

Re:Seriously...are we cool?

[Anonymous Coward]

So, Wil...

Are we cool? I mean, I always thought you didn't know me from Adam, but I always enjoy your postings on /.

So are we cool? Or are ya just drumming up publicity for the next show?

-- Every Slashdotter Here

Re:How sad would you rate Trekkie fans ?

[duck_prime]

You appear to have a healthy level of distain for "Trekkies" who become obsessed with the series. Where does this stem from, and what would you recommend that these people do instead.

Er ... install Linux? ;)

Re:Free Enterprise

[runlvl0]

Aargh!

Free Enterprise [amazon.com] was farking AWESOME! Remember, it came out around the same time as Galaxy Quest, so it didn't get nearly the attention that it deserved, but I've always considered it Galaxy Quest's "Evil Twin." It actually had Shatner AS Shatner, doing a much better job at skewering himself than Tim Fucking Allen.

(If I live to be a thousand and have extensive electroshock therapy, it won't be enough to get "the Artist Formerly Known As Shatner" - as he was credited along with The Rated R - RAPPING Mark Anthony's funeral oration out of my head! "Here, under leave of Brutus and the rest -- For Brutus is an honorable man, So are they all, all honorable men ")

It was at once "pee yourself funny", and (if you're a big honking Star Trek geek like me) kinda painful to watch. This movie is for you if you get the reference:

[Shatner just asked Robert why he started the fight.]
Young Robert: Well... it was something he said.
Imaginary William Shatner: What'd he say?
Young Robert: You really don't want to know.
Imaginary William Shatner: I really do want to know!
Young Robert: He said that Han Solo was cooler than Captain Kirk.
[Pause]
Imaginary William Shatner: Kick the little fucker's ass.

"Coming Soon: The Artist Formerly Known as Shatner in "William Shatner vs. the World Crime League""

Re:Speech

[3-State Bit]

>when Christopher Plummer was felled by a kidney stone
I'm sorry, I can't stop laughing at the way you phrased that.

Re:What happened to all those tribbles??

[Tablizer]

They all went back to the "Toupe bin" where they came from.

Re:Speech

[runlvl0]

Was there really something? On. The. Wing?

Re:Computer Simulations of You

[JMan1]

You're new here, aren't you?

Re:Trekkies

[Gary]

He expressed dissapointment that the top effects studio went on strike during the filming of "Final Frontier". He felt it would have done better at the box office if they had full effects. Hmmmm. Perhaps they can re-release it and edit in better effects, like Lucas did to Star Wars. Should I ask him if that has ever been considered?

At the same time ask him if he can have it completely rewritten and redone with a new director. That *might* actually improve the movie.

G.

star trek love...

[jimmajamma]

how many dem *alien* hos didja jam witcha prime directive?

what is sex in space like?

[peter303]

There are a lot of rumors that NASA and the Russian space program have investigated this, but no one is talking on the record yet. For example, Newton's 3rd law- "for every action, a reaction" complicating movement in zero-G. You are the most famous libidous space-amn and must know the answer :-)

This is an atrocity!

[wwwgregcom]

Everything Wil Wheaton says gets modded up +5! Why you ask? Because he is famous. This then causes his karma to go up! Since when can fame bring you karma? This a true butchering of the concept of karma, and I will not stand for it! Kick Wil off slashdot! Who is with me?

Ps. The preceding mesage is just a joke.

Re:What happened to all those tribbles??

[drinkypoo]

Didn't one moonlight as his hairpiece for a little while?

Re:How do you feel...

[ScannerBoy]

My mother admits naming me Kirk after your character.

Acording to her, I was really only an hours worth of pain medication from being named Spock.

A question about Rescue 911

[pyramid termite]

Star Trek made many wonder whether there was intelligent life in the universe. Did Rescue 911 ever make you wonder if there was intelligent life on this planet? A lot of the people on that show were rescued when they did some awfully dumb and dangerous things ...

Oh......My........God

[Anonymous Coward]

You have NEVER seen a vagina, have you? You poor, god-forsaken bastard.

About Chekhov

[Random Addict]

Mr. Shatner,
This has bugged me ever since STII: Wrath of Kahn came out. When Chekhov and his CO are surveying that planet for suitability for the Genesis trial, and they come across the shuttle craft, Chekhov realizes who the thing belongs to and tries to hurry the hell out. Unfortunately, they end up running into the arms of Kahn and his merry crew of castaways. Kahn fails to recognize Chekhov's CO, but he recognizes Chekhov. How can this be? In the episode "Space Seed" in which the Enterprise encounters Kahn and his gang of genetically engineered supermen (and women), Chekhov had not yet joined the crew of the Enterprise. Why couldn't the producers and director of STII take this glaring bit of reality into account???

Oh, wait....(sheepish grin)

Yeah, maybe I should get a life, huh?

Re:How sad would you rate Trekkie fans ?

[Aexia]

He would probably rate them:

-1 : Troll

Wouldn't it be:

Minus! .... One. Troll.

Star Trek vs. Star Wars

[ZoneManSPW]

Do you like the Star Wars movies?

Re:Trekkies

[Some Dumbass...]

Mr Shatner,

What is the scariest experience you have ever had with one of your adoring fans?

Not counting some of these questions...

Re:Speech

[perfessor multigeek]

And let's not forget the slowest speech ever on ST, in the first movie, when they are caught in the wormhole.
Fi-re - Pho-ton - tor - pe -dos.
Be-lay - that - or-der!
and so on.
Hoo boy was I grateful when they finally got to . . .
Pho -ton - tor-pe-dos - - a - WAYYYY!

My god. It's been twenty-two years and I'm *still* annoyed.
Rustin

Speaking of Free Enterprise...

[timotten]

I have two questions:

* How.. did you decide... on... your enunciative style? Was it... like a flash of light, suddenly you knew... that Kirk... did not know... how to enunciate? Or were you... coached? Did it seem... innovative? Do you feel... trapped, unable to break through... to become free... from your type-casting.

* When are you going to finish that one-man production of Julius Caesar?