Superbowl XXXVII

So, if you're a good, patriotic American, you're certainly watching the Superbowl right about now. The dot-com ads should be pretty much absent this year, but perhaps there will be something more interesting than ads for recycled movies. Maybe even the game will be worth watching. :) Update: 01/27 17:02 GMT by T : Chardish writes "If you didn't catch the trailer for The Matrix: Reloaded on the Superbowl last night, it's now available for download."

First post!

[Anonvmous Coward]

Cos I hate football! (thus I'm not busy watching the game)

i'm rooting for the team with the highest score

[jdkane]

Since there's nothing much to discuss right now, who wants to be the first to place a bet?

Thank God...

[Vargasan]

"So, if you're a good, patriotic American, you're certainly watching the Superbowl right about now."

Thank God, I'm not an American. I don't know anyone willing to sit through 4 hours of "Pre-Game", 3 hours of the game, then another 2 hours of "Post-Game Wrap-up".

Is all that really necessary?

Re:Not to be a troll here but...

[Anonymous Coward]

If you're watching super bowl alone, you're watching super bowl with Hitler! Or Saddam. Or bin Laden! Or perhaps Saddam again.
What are you, a terrorist? :-)

Re:i'm rooting for the team with the highest score

[Anonymous Coward]

I'm betting on the cheerleaders.

Super Bowl...

[Anonymous Coward]

...according to Pacino:
Super Bowl! Superior Bowl! Suuuuuperfluous Bowl! Whoo-Hah!

Ozzie

[GrimSean]

I've been told that Ozze is going to be in a commercial for Diet Pepsi.

All I can say is F*** that.

Re:No.

[Anonymous Coward]

Remember kids, Osama Bi^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^HSaddam Hussein doesn't watch the superbowl.

Unless you want to be like Osa^H^H^HSaddam, you better watch the Superbowl. Especially the ads, since otherwise you're stealing.

Re:Did that Matrix trailer 0wn of what?!?!

[Vexler]

I am waiting to see Agent Smith and Neo break out into a twenty-five-on-one, Shaolin-style gang fight.

Huh?

[SecretAsianMan]

if you're a good, patriotic American, you're certainly watching the Superbowl right about now

The what? (you insensitive clod)

Re:Thank God...

[BrookHarty]

Thank God, I'm not an American. I don't know anyone willing to sit through 4 hours of "Pre-Game", 3 hours of the game, then another 2 hours of "Post-Game Wrap-up".

2 hours of "Making of Lord of the Rings", then 3 hours "Lord of the Rings" followed by an hour of "Behind the Scenes of LOTR" on cable.

Different strokes for different folks.

Re:Not to be a troll here but...

[PsychoSlashDot]

You're right; football-watching isn't particularly patriotic. On the other hand, insulting anyone who likes soccer (ie. the rest of the world)is.

My predictions for the superbowl:

[Gyorg_Lavode]

Advertisements win. Buccaneers, Raiders, and John Madden's public image lose.

Right now I think it's a tie between FedEx and the matrix trailer, but who knows what will happen. It's wide open.

And why oh why can't they just get John Madden stuffed. No one wants to hear what he has to sais. It's his face and his fat ass that he gets paid for.

Re:Thank God...

[whee]

Yes! Of course it's necessary! After the four hours of Pre-Game, we can finally concentrate on the actual game. But not before. If there were no pre-game, there might as well be no game! What good is the game if you haven't been practicing wasting time before you can start wasting time for real? That's like driving without a license!

Now, after you've been practicing wasting time and calling unneccessary bets on the outcome of the game, you can actually watch it! Of course, the actual game is redundant, mindless, and about as fun to watch as drying paint, but that's what it means to be an American!

Then after you've gained 10 kg due to overeating (and lost 10% of brain mass due to watching the game), you can watch the Post-Game Wrap-up! This is what you've waited your entire life for! But of course, you first must see what dazed and confused person has just won Publishers Clearings House! Aren't you glad for them?! The mystical Post-Game Wrap-up is where you get to watch the game all over again! Not the entire game, mind you, but all of the exciting parts where things happen! Like the time where some guy drops the ball, and then someone else grabs it! It's incredibly unpredictable, even the fifth time around.

Finally, after the Post-Game Wrap-up, you can relive it all next morning on the local news! What a deal!

Re:Forgive the obvious question...

[Uart]

Good point!

As we all know from various movies and television shows (Revenge of the Nerds?), geeks don't like sportts.

Its a natural extension of our general hatred of the Jocks...

Lets go back to building our robots and reading about math.

Superbowl - what a rip

[frovingslosh]

I never watch it. I did tune in for that XXX rated one they advertised about seven years ago, but I didn't find anything even mildly erotic about it.

Re:Not to be a troll here but...

[dunkelfalke]

american culture?

nice oxymoron.

Re:The StupidBowl?

[Uart]

Thats awesome! I too find the mating habits of drosophila melaogaster (the fruit fly) to be awfully intriguing. I first observed their mating ritual while trying to confirm the results of T.H. Morgan during a routine test cross.....

Re:Not to be a troll here but...

[AKnightCowboy]

I agree. The Superbowl is the most overhyped football game of the year and is completely boring (IMHO) unless your home team is one of the teams playing. Personally I'm waiting for the war in Iraq to begin so I can cheer on the home team (Americans) in their fight for freedom of the Iraqi people. Goooooo Yankees! I remember watching the Gulf War as a young teenager and it was the best time. I never watched CNN that much in all my life before then and only September 11th had me watching it like that again. Wars are excellent to stimulate the patriotism of a nation. It's like a national football game.

Re:Not to be a troll here but...

[suss]

I didn't see the U.N. pass a resolution, and I didn't hear an "Axis of Evil" tag attached to it.

In this post-columbine, post-9/11 time, we must think of the children!

If you don't watch the superbowl, you're supporting terrorism!

You know you want to watch, because it's what jesus would do...

Did i forget any?

Re:Thank God...

[dogfart]

Thank God, I'm not an American. I don't know anyone willing to sit through 4 hours of "Pre-Game", 3 hours of the game, then another 2 hours of "Post-Game Wrap-up".

Just consider it a really strange religious ritual. Sort of like the old Latin Roman Catholic mass. Merely sitting through it without falling asleep provided tons 'o grace

Please send help.

[Burgundy Advocate]

Hello Slashdot,

I am hosting a small Superbowl gathering at my residence. However, I have come upon a true crisis:

We've run out of Nacho Cheese Dip.

Now, let me explain the situation a little further. I am posting from my kitchen, and outside are two pregnant ladies, three 250+ pound men, and an eight year old child, with his paintball gun that his oh-so-intelligent father was so quick to buy him.

If I don't come back with something, there will be a "conflict". And by "conflict" I mean it in the same way the Israeli-Palestinian situation is a "conflict".

This is where you come in: Send Nacho Cheese.

My girlfriend and I are armed only with a few cans of Keystone Light. Please. We don't want to die.

Re:Ozzie

[codeMonkeyWannabe]

Yeah, what a lame ass commercial... oh wait, all
commercials are lame ass. Hear that, marketroids?
LAME ASS! Wow, I didn't think the Oz would sink
that low. And when's the Oz gonna take the clippers
to the poofy hair on that pudgeball son of his? At
least we didn't have to hear Kelly Ozbourne sing
(whew!)...

Super Bowl... bah humbug!

Re:Ozzie

[AKnightCowboy]

I've been told that Ozze is going to be in a commercial for Diet Pepsi. All I can say is F*** that.

Yes, it's a real shame that Ozzie is finally caving in to the corporate pressure and going mainstream and commercial. What's next, Britney Spears doing a Coke commercial? What is this world coming to when artists give in to big corporate interests like that in order to profit?

Re:WTF IS ON MADDEN'S SHIRT?

[corebreech]

That's Al Michaels.

Re:Forgive the obvious question...

[Cheesy Fool]

Well done, you've picked two sports more boring than american football.

Re:The dumbification of /.

[evilquaker]

Remember when this was "news for nerds, stuff that matters"? ... Recently we've had "SOHO", "Crop circles", and now this. All "posted by Michael"...

You've been here since Slashdot really was NFN, STM, and yet you're just now figuring out that Michael's an idiot?

How about deselecting his name under "Exclude stories from the Homepage" (Preferences -> Homepage) and saving yourself the grief?

Re:Thank God...

[Marlor]

Yeah, but the SuperBowl is just a bunch of pansies running around in padded armour, but Lord Of The Rings is .... ummm .... errr ..... OK you win.

Cruel. Just cruel.

[CleverNickName]

2 hours of "Making of Lord of the Rings", then 3 hours "Lord of the Rings" followed by an hour of "Behind the Scenes of LOTR" on cable.

I just spent two valuable minutes looking for this on TV, you insensitive clod!

The best I could find was FOTR on Starz.

Dammit.

Halftime Show

[superdan2k]

Is it just me or does Shania Twain look like she's wearing a Star Wars costume? Is she Darth Slut?

Re:Who gives a damn

[Anonymous Coward]

Yeah,I pretty much agree,who wants to see grown men,hump over smell each others ass,then get up and fight like hell?

Re:Not to be a troll here but...

[Kipper the Llama]

No, it's not unpatriotic to skip on the Super Bowl, but it should be if you don't grasp hyperbole.

Get a life.

Ha Ha Loser test and you all failed!

[Frank of Earth]

This was a plot by /. editors to see who the big losers are that are on their nerdy computers rather than getting drunk, eating nacho cheese and hanging with girls

Ha ha! You all failed by posting and reading comments here! Ha Ha.. err.. ha.. err... *cough* err..

Re:Actually

[EggplantMan]

Hey guys, I know I shouldn't do this, but what the hell. I live in the east and I already saw the whole thing. The buccaneers won.

Sorry.

I'm doin' my part.

[pi_rules]

Sittin' back, cleaning my new assault rifle, havin' a couple of beers and keeping and eye on the game.

Now, what's more American than that? I got a gun, my beer, and a football game.

You need a cover sheet on your TPS reports!!!

[jcsehak]

Terry Tate: Office Linebacker

Classic. Worth watching the whole game just for that commercial.

PVR to skip football so I can watch commercials

[BingoBoingo]

I know that the ReplayTV has a function to skip commericals.

I want a function to skip the football game so I can watch the commercials.

-Fuzz

Re:Real-Time...

[f0dder]

After SNL Celebrity Jeapardy, Keanu Reeves is damaged goods.. Alex Trebek: Why? Keanu Reeves has an impressive -$32,000.
Keanu Reeves: I know Kung Fu.
Alex Trebek: For the last time, no you don't.
And finally, Hilary Swank in a commanding lead with zero.

Connery, Reeves, Swank

Alex Trebek: Welcome back to Celebrity Jeopardy. I thought we were done with this, but Regis Philbin, that mongrel idiot, decided to do a Celebrity Millionaire, and network competition being what it is, I stand before you, a broken and miserable man. Let's take a look at the scores. Sean Connery has set a new Jeopardy record for futility with...

Sean Connery: Suck on it Trebek. Suck it long, and suck it hard.

Alex Trebek: That's beautiful. You kiss your mother with that mouth.

Sean Connery: No, but I did something to your mother with this mouth! [ points to mouth ]

Alex Trebek: Why? Keanu Reeves has an impressive -$32,000.

Keanu Reeves: I know Kung Fu.

Alex Trebek: For the last time, no you don't. And finally, Hilary Swank in a commanding lead with zero.

Hilary Swank: Did I win? Because there's some people I need to thank.

Alex Trebek: Let's just take a look at the board. And the categories are: "Potent Potables"; "Foreign Flicks"; "Things Trebek Sucks"-wait! [ Connery is laughing. ] All right. [ Trebek walks over and takes down the hand-written "Things Trebek Sucks" sign. ] Let's continue..."Potpourri"; "Hot or Cold"; "What Ears Do"; "Is This A Hat"-that's where I name and object, and you tell whether or not it's a hat. And finally, "Colors That End In Urple". Hilary Swank, you're in the lead, so we'll start with you.

Hilary Swank: I'm a girl you know.

Alex Trebek: [ shakes head ] Let's just go with Foreign Flicks for $800. [ Connery buzzes in. ]

Sean Connery: Ursula Andress.

Alex Trebek: What?

Sean Connery: Ursula Andress, Catherine Deneuve, and Charo, twice.

Alex Trebek: That's Foreign Flicks, Mr. Connery. Foreign Flicks. Mr. Reeves, why don't you pick?

Keanu Reeves: I shall take Balloons for $800, if you please.

Alex Trebek: That's not a category.

Keanu Reeves: My mistake. I shall choose Balloons for $600.

Alex Trebek: I tell you what, let's do Colors That End in Urple. For $800. This color ends in "urple". [ Swank buzzes in. ] Hilary Swank.

Hilary Swank: What is light urple?

Alex Trebek: [ shakes head ] Wow. [ Reeves buzzes in. ] Keanu Reeves.

Keanu Reeves: I will venture a guess. Who is Jaleel White?

Alex Trebek: What?

Keanu Reeves: Is that not the gentlemen who played Urple, the humorous fellow with the glasses who loves cheese?

Alex Trebek: That's Urkel! [ Connery buzzes in. ] Oh good, Mr. Connery wants to say something.

Sean Connery: I thought of some more foreign ladies I snogged.

Alex Trebek: Let's just go to Hot or Cold for $400. And it's a Video Daily Double. Here goes nothing. Please take a look at your video monitors. [ screen shows Ricky Martin and two dancers. They start dancing. ]

Ricky Martin: It's me! Come on, Ricky Martin! Come on! [ music starts ] Oh my! In this cup there's some hot tea! It's hot hot hot! Watch! [ takes a sip ] Yow! Hot hot hot! So the answer is: Hot hot hot! or cold. Hot hot hot! or cold. Come on! Hot hot hot! [ video fades ] [ no one buzzes in. ]

Alex Trebek: None of you knows. No one can figure out if the hot tea is hot or cold. [ Reeves buzzes in. ] Thank God! Keanu Reeves.

Keanu Reeves: Is it iced tea?

Alex Trebek: [ agitated ] No! It's hot tea!

Keanu Reeves: Well, then I have no idea.

Alex Trebek: Let's just go to Final Jeopardy. The category is...oh come on, why would they do this? The category is Famous Mothers.

Sean Connery: [ laughs ] My day has come! [ keeps laughing ]

Alex Trebek: [ rips card ] I'm not going to give you the satisfaction. [ Connery stops laughing. ] The new category is Anything. Write anything. [ music starts ] Just write. Use your arm, hand, and special pen, and move the pen around. Scribble if you want to, just make some kind of mark. [ music stops ] OK, let's get this over with. Sean Connery, you wrote down: Below. I don't know why you wrote that, but technically that's a correct answer. You did write something. Let's see what you wagered: Me. Below Me. [ Connery laughs ] Below Me...I don't get it.

Sean Connery: Oh, I'll bet you do, you Canadian ponch. [ slaps Trebek on the head. ]

Alex Trebek: Proud day for you and your family. Keanu Reeves, you look rather pleased. Let's see what you wrote down: [ a blank screen is revealed ] Nothing. The question was write anything, and you got it wrong. I'm speechless. Let's see what you wagered: Eleventy billion dollars. That's not even a real number.

Keanu Reeves: Yet.

Alex Trebek: That's simply amazing. And finally, Hilary Swank.

Hilary Swank: Thanks Alex. I'm so honored to have been here today, there's so many people I have to thank. [ camera shows a sobbing Chad Lowe in the audience. ] I couldn't have done it without Alex Trebek, the incredible cast and crew of Jeopardy, my publicist who is a beautiful human being...that's it.

Alex Trebek: Touching. That's all for Jeopardy; Regis, you can have them. Good night. [ Connery pushes Trebek as he walks by. ]

Re:YYYYoouurrrrr in luckkkkk

[anticypher]

IIIiii jjuuusssssssttttt ppppoooooorrrrreeeeddd aaaa wwwwoooolllleeeee jjaaaaaarrrrrrr oooffffff NNNNNnnnnaaaacccccoooooo ccccCCCCCccccceeeeeesssssseeeee ddddddiiiiiiiiippppp iiiiiiinnnnnntttttooooooooo mmmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyyyyyy kkkkkkkkkeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyy bbbbbbbbboooooooooaaaaaaarrrrrrrddddd,,,, iiiitttt sssooooouuuuullllldddd bbbbbbe tttttteeeerrrrreeee aaaannnnnyyy mmmmiiinnnuuuttteee nnnnnnooooowwwww

ttttteeeeee AAAaaaCCCCCCcccccc

[author of cheesedip over IP protocol]

Re:Thank God...

[ruprechtjones]

You are so wrong with this.

Pre-game starts, you gather with the friends, and beer and nachos come out.

Game starts, bets are already placed, you settle down and start watching the commercials-er, game. Nachos are finished, sixth beer is opened.

By half-time, you're drunk and full, Twain is showing her stomach, and the No Doubt chick looks like she's been hanging out with Courtney Love too much. She looks thrashed. You take a nap.

Post-game show is up. You get to find out what you missed whilst napping, but you're too groggy to remember.

Following morning, you watch the news to get the highlights of the game, in order to fit in with the water-cooler crowd at work.

This is American Football. God bless us all.

Heh, this game is old..

[WeThree]

I downloaded this off kazaa like 2 weeks ago, duh.

Re:Yeah I'm sure...

[Anonymous Coward]

not giggling like a retard if a female looks in my direction

So what? you have a problem with gays now? Friggin biggot.

The thing I enjoyed the most about the Superbowl

[long_john_stewart_mi]

The Superbowl is wierd. Celine Dion sang "God Bless America", and she's Canadian. If an American started singing "God Save The Queen" he'd probably be shot and then called a terrorist.

Re:Not to be a troll here but...

[geekoid]

there's a "rest of the world" now?

Re:First post!

[Goldberg's Pants]

So... who played this year?

Miami won, 3 sets to 1.

Best ad: Terry Tate - Office Linebacker (Reebok ad. Ads are on their website)

Silly muggles

[Anonymous Coward]

What's so great about a game with only one ball and no flying?

Re:Cruel. Just cruel.

[Goldberg's Pants]

Do you not own the DVD? If you don't, I'm afraid I have to ask you to turn in your geek membership card. And your decoder ring. Someone will be around to collect your Linux disks in a few days. Please do not attempt to fight them. They are well trained, and know (of) several martial arts.

Think of it as protective coloration

[TheConfusedOne]

Seeing how the average nerd is treated in the corporate world it is probably good to occasionally provide talking points for them to use in the office. This may avoid them getting beaten up at the water cooler and having their lunch money stolen. :-D

To this point I offer the following.
Sports survival phrases for the average nerd:
1) So, did you see the game last night? (This one is almost always safe there is usually at least some game playing. Change to "last weekend" and you're doubly covered.)
2) Man, I can't believe how bad the ref blew that call. (Again, safe. Just let them start talking about "the call" and nod and look wise.)
And if all else fails...
3) I just watch to see the cheerleaders.

Re:About the singing...

[[e-mail]]

Did anyone notice that Shania Twain lip-sync'ed her songs

You were watching her mouth?