Junkyard Wars Wants You!

Dan Messinger writes "Bring On The Junk! Junkyard Wars is looking for new contestants to compete on the 2003 series. Teams of contestants are given ten hours to build a machine to solve a specific challenge using parts they salvage from a junkyard. In contrast to previous seasons, this year we are looking for individual applicants who are skilled at putting together sophisticated machinery and not afraid of getting their hands dirty. Successful candidates will possess a strong background in engineering, fabrication and a good mechanical 'know how.' Junkyard Wars wants applications from people of all ages, races, creeds, colors, sexes, religions, and sexual orientations, as well as people with physical disabilities. We are especially interested in applications from women and/or people of color, as previous crops of contenders have been underrepresented among these groups. Lots of kids watch Junkyard Wars and we want to show them that anyone can grow up to be the world's greatest mechanic or engineer! If you think you match the description or you know of someone who does - please log onto our website and apply: you will find the application forms as well as all of the information that you need regarding applying. Application deadline is February 28, 2003."

PC!

[Gannoc]

I've been saying for years that we need more hispanic lesbians building robots on TV. Count me IN!

The best part of that show

[stevens]

was Cathy rogers. Rrowr!

Translation:

[teamhasnoi]

The other people caught on, and we need some new people to come in and clean up this junkyard.

Great show but wrong place to solicit

[Anonymous Coward]

Don't you know the Slashdot audience?
Overweight all-talk do-nothing airchair warriors.
If you had some sort of porn watching or complaining challenge - then this would be the place.

You're posting this on the wrong site...

[Asprin]

But HW is probably a little too "RL" for the /. crowd.

Now, if it were **LEGO** wars, or involved building video game consoles out of discarded kitchen appliances we could talk.

Great show though. Engineering r0X0rz!

i wanna see the slashdot squad...

[TechnoVooDooDaddy]

and see them fail miserably because they wasted 6 hours arguing over whether to use the MIG/MAG or TIG welding torch, or spending all the time trying to get linux to boot on their handheld so they can run some simulation calculations....

Contradiction

[Anonymous Coward]

"...and not afraid of getting their hands dirty..."

"...as well as people with physical disabilities..."

What about people with no hands?

This IS slashdot...

[JohnA]

this year we are looking for individual applicants who are skilled at putting together sophisticated machinery and not afraid of getting their hands dirty.

Hands dirty? The poster does realize that this is slashdot, right?

Perhaps he ment to post that they were looking for someone to bitch on the sidelines in the upcoming season...

Wow, just like Mad Max

[georgeha]

If I can contact the legless mechanic and Tina Turner, I've got myself a team!

Correct me if I'm wrong..

[cioxx]

..but wouldn't this be more suited for [H]ardOCP folk? Slashdot crowd's needs are different. Hear me out.

Create a gameshow called IT Storage Wars.

Premise: Nerds will be unleashed upon ridiculously aged hardware with a copy of putty.exe, 5 1/5 floppy disc, Linux distribution on a USB-pen, and a wrench to build enterprise-level application servers complete with clustering and a backend database.

I think this could be a winning combination.

Wow

[superdan2k]

This is probably going to become the first time in history that a snail-mail box is going to feel the wrath of the Slashdot Effect.

And yes, I'll be applying. Heh.

Wonder if they will...

[boaworm]

... make the competition more suitable to the ./ crowd.

*Mental Picture*

Ok, guys.. You got 10 hours to build a PC that will run Quake2 in 60 FPS or more. Good luck !

Not trying ot be mean...

[spammeister]

But dohn't they contradict the statement of having "diasbled people" and people with "good skills" on the same show. I mean the show is pretty funny now, but have a bunch of one armed people with an IQ of 50 will just make it a "sad funny". I have nothing against stupid people, some of my best friends are stupid! Obviously the show cheats enough as it is to magiclaly get this contraptions to work, but going too far will just turn it into a fantasy show.

On an off-tanget note, I wonder if they will have a show like that 100 years from now. "On the next episode in 5D vision Refuse Pile Conflicts (politically corret), our two teams (made up of humnas and robitic celebrities) try to construct a particle accelerator and see which team can extract the most Uranium 238 in an hour to make fuel for a mass driver."

Cathy Rogers and Bobo

[BigBlockMopar]

I wonder if Cathy Rogers liked my Junkyard Wars entry tape from a couple of years ago. Bobo hates cans. And sometimes garlic cloves, too. [glowingplate.com]

Re:Wow .. ironic isnt it

[objekt]

No, the irony is that you ended up in the wrong thread.

I guess you do need a better back button after all.

Re:Underrepresentation?

[sydlexic]

Also, more hot chicks wear I work would be great (*damn* did I say that out loud?)

what's an "I work" and how do you wear one?

Why So Few Gay Engineers?

[BigBlockMopar]

Those groups are "underrepresented" among engineers!

Yeah, tell me about it. In my engineering classes, out of about 300 students, we only had two gay guys. Two! And they were both in aerospace engineering.

It was really annoying, because anytime I needed fashion advice, I had to walk all the way to the arts buildings on the other end of campus and start asking random people in the hallways.

In my experience, there are only two kinds of people who can drink harder than engineers: mariners and gay people. I think it would be utterly terrifying to meet a gay marine engineer.

Pet Peeve #1

[chrysrobyn]

please log onto our website

I tried, but I couldn't find the blank for my userid and password. Perhaps your site is broken.

Re:Underrepresentation?

[gowen]

<sound of man bashing head against table>

Jesus, thats one of the dumbest things I've ever typed. *where*, *where*, *where*

I am an idiot.

The beginning of the end

[JohnnyBolla]

Tonight, on a very special episode of Junkyard Wars- Two guys in wheel chairs join the megalomaniacs. Can Nosher find the true beauty within them, or will he be untouched by their stoic perseverance at trying to drag a mini out of a pile of crap? Will he tear their wheelchairs apart to get the motors? Will they all cry together at the end?
Will this show suck?

To bad they don't want

[TerryAtWork]

people who like to post 'F1r5t p0t7 d00d! 1'm 1337!'

Then they'd have come to the right place.

Re:PC!

[Chocolate Teapot]

I've been saying for years that we need more hispanic lesbians building robots on TV

So that's how they breed. I always wondered.

Re:Why So Few Gay Engineers?

[Chocolate Teapot]

In my experience, there are only two kinds of people who can drink harder than engineers: mariners and gay people. I think it would be utterly terrifying to meet a gay marine engineer.

Depends who's buying the drinks.

Coming soon to TLC ...

[Greedo]

Case-Mod Wars!

Overclock-Your-Toaster Wars!

Run-Linux-on-(anything) Wars!

Re:Correct me if I'm wrong..

[Greedo]

You can be the next contestant on Beowulf Challenge.

Re:Not trying ot be mean...

[mattreilly]

I have nothing against stupid people, some of my best friends are stupid!

Birds of a feather...

Re:i wanna see the slashdot squad...

[Some Bitch]

Don't forget the part where 'Informative' kicks 'Interesting' in the balls after 'Troll' starts an argument over whether to license it under BSD or GPL.

Re:Great show but wrong place to solicit

[shivianzealot]

As a skinny pale all-talk-do-nothing airchair warrior, I am deeply offended! Stereotypes like this are hurtful and counter productive but... hmmm... one more sentance and I might be doing something.

/me crawls back into his seat

Re:PC!

[Cpt_Kirks]

I'v always thought a one-armed, one-eyed bisexual hermaphrodite eskimo would rock on that show!

But hey, I'm a bit kinky...

Junkyard Wars Wants You?

[BMonger]

But in Soviet Russia...

You want Junkyard Wa....

Never mind.

Re:Why So Few Gay Engineers?

[kryzx]

Russians definitely have to be in the running here. Now, a gay Russian marine engineer - that would be something.

I nominate Maxwell Hall

[DulcetTone]

Maker of the best hackery on the web that no one knows about: Plywood Guy [maxmatic.com]

Plywood Guy is an "exercise in the magic power of plywood and drywall screws. He crouches! He stands! He stores potential energy!"

tone

Junkyard wars " M$ Internet Edition"

[Cyberia]

Contestants must take code snipets from Real M$ applications and make some thing that REALLY functions and DOES what they planned it to do, and it won't cost a fortune to build, and can be done in a matter of 10 hours.

Nominate the fundie fartbags

[VegeBrain]

I nominate Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson because they both have very extensive experience in fabrication.

I'm putting together my team....

[DrJohnnie]

During lunch I'm going to run out in the shop and ask all the black welders and machinist if they're gay.....

Re:Sounds like fun

[Bunji X]

Steelworkers of America, keep reaching for that rainbow!

Re:TV Magic!

[Moofie]

Hey, have you seen my keys? 'Cuz I already looked in the last place I looked, and they weren't there.

For real. I need my keys. What'd you do with them? This isn't funny anymore...

Re:PC!

[operagost]

That's one-armed, one-eyed bisexual hermaphrodite INUIT, you insensitive clod!

Re:Not trying ot be mean...

[Moofie]

I want to see Dr. Hawking open a jammed car door with a pickaxe.

There do exist some disabilities which preclude some people from doing some activities. For instance, I am not well suited to bearing children, since I'm male.

Re:Underrepresentation?

[Bunji X]

I think he meant "Ewok [starwars.com]".

Wearing an Ewok is simple: Fry it with a laser, make clothes of the fur.

Re:How about "Software Junkyard Wars"...

[Anonymous Coward]

Wow, now that's what I call exciting television!

"An ass out of you and me."

[JKConsult]

The headline assumes that since I'm reading Slashdot, I have the remotest of mechanical skills. My fiery death on JW would prove this assumption to be patently (and dangerously) false.

An Army recruiter, calling to tell my parents my score on the Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery test (I took it in high school to get out of class): "Your son has some of the highest scores I've seen. Except....on the 'mechanics' section."

My dad: "What'd he get?"

Recruiter: "A 15. You know, sir, the average 11th grade girl scores a 45."

My dad: "That's higher than I would have thought he'd score."

I am...

[jo_ham]

..Klingon, you insensitive clod!