10 Ads The US Won't See

10 Ads The US Won't See 536

Posted by Hemos on Monday December 29, 2003 @06:53PM from the it-rots-your-brain-it-does dept.

prostoalex writes "Some ads made by world's leading advertising agencies for well-known brands will never be seen in the United States. The Gucci G-Spot turned out to be too risque, video for Drug-Free America was deemed too disgusting, Internet's favorite Honda "Cog" commercial won't air due to the high prices for a 2-minute spot, and Japanese commercials with American actors have contracts preventing the companies to run the same ads in the US. AdAge provides a link to the pictures and video (Windows Media .ASF format, alas) of the 10 best unaired commercials." I can get the ASFs working under VLC.

10 Ads The US Won't See

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I 4 1 (Score:3, Funny)

by Zangief ( 461457 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @06:54PM (#7831104) Homepage Journal

don't welcome any new ads. The only good ad is the blocked/skipped ad.

To mutilate an old phrase... (Score:2, Funny)

by OtakuHawk ( 682073 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @06:55PM (#7831108)

No ads is good ads.

Another ad America won't see (Score:5, Funny)

by Gyan ( 6853 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @06:57PM (#7831122)

NOT safe for work...

Hand-rolled cigars [lycos.co.uk] (MPG)

Doge Aries K Class (Score:4, Funny)

by dildatron ( 611498 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @06:59PM (#7831131)

Even though it's not a real commercial (used to be on AdCritic back when it was good), I loved the Dodge Aries K-Class car commercial. It was a hilarious spoof of car commercials...

98 horsepower... standard.

map light... standard.

etc.

Re:Shit nuggets taste better than testicles?! (Score:0, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:00PM (#7831136)

Dear Slashdot,
I find the above very offensive. Please terminate their account asap and block them for ever posting again. Thanks!

There are some things money can't buy... (Score:2, Funny)

by LostCluster ( 625375 ) * writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:00PM (#7831139)

Production costs: $1.2 million
2 minutes of network airtime: $2 million
Mention on Slashdot: Priceless.

Call it a hunch... (Score:5, Funny)

by Faust7 ( 314817 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:01PM (#7831144) Homepage

Something tells me the second ad, "Gucci's G Spot," will be the one primarily responsible for the site's eventual Slashdotting.

I bet we'll never see an ad for this... (Score:4, Funny)

by Sevn ( 12012 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:01PM (#7831145) Homepage Journal

*useful product. [dangpow.com]

*credit goes to some person on fark a while ago.

Yeah, that's what I was thinking (Score:5, Funny)

by iamdrscience ( 541136 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:07PM (#7831183) Homepage

After watching the Simpsons and the 10 minutes of commercial I get from that and coming to slashdot to waste some time geeking out and seeing an ad for "OSDN personals [osdn.com]" (WTF, by the way...) I just got the feeling that I wasn't watching nearly enough commercials.

Yet Another ad America won't see (Score:5, Funny)

by Dukeofshadows ( 607689 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:09PM (#7831205) Journal

Microsoft Windows...stability guarenteed or your money back!

Ads (Score:3, Funny)

by mrpuffypants ( 444598 ) * writes: <mrpuffypants@gm a i l . c om> on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:10PM (#7831208)

Speaking of ads, my roommatte pointed out something funny about my TiVo:

I got the tivo partly to skip ads, now I never have to watch them during the shows I record (thank GOD for the 30-sec backdoor)

However, every week a new add will show up on the tivo main screen and I always watch those. He asked me why, if I hate ads so much, I watch the longer-form ads just because tivo wants me to see them.

thats some Zen shit i tell ya....

Re:Doge Aries K Class (Score:3, Funny)

by dildatron ( 611498 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:13PM (#7831237)

Well, poop. Here is a link [dariusrudis.com] that doesn't require an evil subscription.

funny == good && good > bad (Score:5, Funny)

by bersl2 ( 689221 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:16PM (#7831262) Journal

Dear advertising execs:

If you're going to put ads on the air, make them good and funny. And I don't mean ha-ha-shut-up funny, I mean really funny, maybe even piss-my-pants funny (but only the first ten times). I still won't buy your product, but you could at least entertain me.

With much contempt,
bersl2

Re:What about ads you can only see here? (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:20PM (#7831285)

I can't see anything advertised on American TV offending anyone else.
You've never seen me during an H2 (fake Hummer) commercial.

Re:Call it a hunch... (Score:5, Funny)

by IthnkImParanoid ( 410494 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:20PM (#7831290)

If only because people will be curious as to what a G Spot is.

one of the funniest... (Score:5, Funny)

by quacking duck ( 607555 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:24PM (#7831322)

Won't see this in the U.S., been trying to find a download of it since coming back from Australia but no luck. Goes something like this...

Beautiful woman is sitting at a restaurant table. The waiter delivers her drink and says "take your top off for a chance to win $10000!"

Woman: "You're joking!"

Waiter: "No, really!"

Woman: "Take my top off, that's all I need for a shot at $10000?"

Waiter: "That's right."

Woman has her already-skimpy top off in a flash. Cut back to the Waiter with a stunned expression.

"I meant the top off your Diet Coke..."

whoa (Score:3, Funny)

by Digypro ( 560571 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:26PM (#7831338) Homepage

How about this---
John Smith's wildly popular U.K. beer spots by TBWA star well-known comedian Peter Kay as an overweight, useless parent who uses a sausage and a beer glass to illustrate the facts of life. Only a U.K. marketer would endorse such a loser as a brand spokesman
Umm, hello?
Dell Dude anyone?

Don't Forget The Puma Ads (Score:5, Funny)

by ticklemeozmo ( 595926 ) writes: <justin...j...novack@@@acm...org> on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:38PM (#7831429) Homepage Journal

Although they are fake [felixsalmon.com], we cannot discount the highly suggestive Puma [memefirst.com] ads [memefirst.com]. Hubba Hubba!

Re:Call it a hunch... (Score:3, Funny)

by hdparm ( 575302 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:48PM (#7831493) Homepage

New Apple's processor?

Re:Call it a hunch... (Score:5, Funny)

by bakes ( 87194 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:54PM (#7831543) Journal

Well, I looked, but I couldn't find it.

Re:There are some things money can't buy... (Score:4, Funny)

by Zork the Almighty ( 599344 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @07:56PM (#7831561) Journal

Mention on Slashdot: Priceless.
Stop deluding yourself and others ;)

Also not safe for work (Score:5, Funny)

by G27 Radio ( 78394 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @08:13PM (#7831651)

I saw this Dutch ad on the Internet a couple years ago. Apparently it's an ad for English classes. That's not the only reason it would never been shown in the US though.

Quicktime Video [g27.org]

Oh, mi dios! El Web site pobre va a ser /.'ed (Score:4, Funny)

by SirDaShadow ( 603846 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @09:10PM (#7831908)

Por supuesto, todavia esta vivo

Re:Password Protected Bra for Office XP (Score:4, Funny)

by Shippy ( 123643 ) * writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @09:49PM (#7832103)

Here's a link to the ad mentioned:

http://www.msboycott.com/media/microsoft_ad_office _bra.mov [msboycott.com]

Re:Japander.com (Score:3, Funny)

by valkraider ( 611225 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @10:09PM (#7832220) Journal

Nah, that was just the name of a website. THIS [japander.com] is a URL...

Re:Oh, mi dios! El Web site pobre va a ser /.'ed (Score:3, Funny)

by DylanQuixote ( 538987 ) writes: <<ten.nosidrah> <ta> <nalyd>> on Monday December 29, 2003 @10:50PM (#7832415) Homepage

Dios mio. `mi dios' no esta correcto.

"Ay, Dios mio! El pobre web site sera /.'ado"

Some more adds the US won't see (Score:2, Funny)

by DroversDog ( 450920 ) writes: on Monday December 29, 2003 @11:08PM (#7832496)

George Bush's Alternative Fuels
Saddam's Adventure Tours of Iraq
O J Simpson's Golf Academy
Bill Clinton's Cigar Emporium
Osama Bin Laden's Weapons Wholesale
Microsofts Totally Secure Software Sale
RIAA Free Downloads
DVD Jon's Handmade Number Plates

but the most anticipated for 2004 is.....

SCO's Closing Down Sale

Linux: Worth suing everone for!

$1,000,000?!? (Score:4, Funny)

by tgd ( 2822 ) writes: on Tuesday December 30, 2003 @12:08AM (#7832766)

I'd happily abandon my dignity for ten bucks.

Hitler and Taiwan (Score:4, Funny)

by That_Dan_Guy ( 589967 ) writes: on Tuesday December 30, 2003 @01:17AM (#7833012)

When I was in Taiwan there was a German company selling heaters there and the add company they hired put Hitler on the sides of busses and billboards announcing this Heater from this company would Win the War on the Cold Front!

It didn't take long for the German company to find out and fire the add company, but that is an add you won't see in America (and sure as heck not in Germany).

Say what? (Score:3, Funny)

by Sviams ( 708968 ) writes: on Tuesday December 30, 2003 @06:14AM (#7833791)

It's morning here, and as I started reading "people upset because they won't get commercials" I figured I had gotten it all wrong and so I read it again.
And again.

Now, I know I'm gonna get stomped down for being a communist or something, but if I were you, I'd be quite happy not to get flooded by any more mindless brainwash designed to turn us all into happy Consumers than we already are!

We do not need commercials to tell us what we need.

Re:What about ads you can only see here? (Score:4, Funny)

by jerde ( 23294 ) writes: on Tuesday December 30, 2003 @06:47AM (#7833854) Journal

Not to mention the fact that Americans have decided that the penis is the most horrible awful thing that must be shunned at all costs. NEVER allow one on tv.

Naked ladies are okay though.

?

- Peter

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10 Ads The US Won't See 536

10 Ads The US Won't See More Login

10 Ads The US Won't See

I 4 1 (Score:3, Funny)

To mutilate an old phrase... (Score:2, Funny)

Another ad America won't see (Score:5, Funny)

Doge Aries K Class (Score:4, Funny)

Re:Shit nuggets taste better than testicles?! (Score:0, Funny)

There are some things money can't buy... (Score:2, Funny)

Call it a hunch... (Score:5, Funny)

I bet we'll never see an ad for this... (Score:4, Funny)

Yeah, that's what I was thinking (Score:5, Funny)

Yet Another ad America won't see (Score:5, Funny)

Ads (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Doge Aries K Class (Score:3, Funny)

funny == good && good > bad (Score:5, Funny)

Re:What about ads you can only see here? (Score:1, Funny)

Re:Call it a hunch... (Score:5, Funny)

one of the funniest... (Score:5, Funny)

whoa (Score:3, Funny)

Don't Forget The Puma Ads (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Call it a hunch... (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Call it a hunch... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:There are some things money can't buy... (Score:4, Funny)

Also not safe for work (Score:5, Funny)

Oh, mi dios! El Web site pobre va a ser /.'ed (Score:4, Funny)

Re:Password Protected Bra for Office XP (Score:4, Funny)

Re:Japander.com (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Oh, mi dios! El Web site pobre va a ser /.'ed (Score:3, Funny)

Some more adds the US won't see (Score:2, Funny)

$1,000,000?!? (Score:4, Funny)

Hitler and Taiwan (Score:4, Funny)

Say what? (Score:3, Funny)

Re:What about ads you can only see here? (Score:4, Funny)

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