Star Wars Episode III To Open Cannes

bonch wrote in to mention an article on the IGN site. "The Cannes Film Festival is going to the dark side. After months of negotiations between George Lucas and festival officials, Star Wars: Episode III - The Revenge Of The Sith will open the festival in the South of France in May."

Combine this with the previous story...

[Jeff DeMaagd]

And you'd get something like: "Monkey Brain controls the Cannes Film Festival".

A Great Disturbance

[kaalamaadan]

As if a million voices cried out in Agony

Ye Olde...

[MorboNixon]

Trashe cannes?

Good idea

[Alcimedes]

We'll have Bud Light open up for Octoberfest while we're at it.

What a frickin' joke. Unless this movie is a massive departure from the other two, it's going to be a terrible, hacked together joke. Why this would open up at Cannes is a mystery to me.

Why open Cannes when you could crush Cannes?

[DietCoke]

I'd rather see the Sith crumple Cannes on their foreheads, personally. Aside from Alexandra Kerry's appearance last year, the festival has gotten outright preachy and boring.

Cannes

[Anonymous Coward]

Ahhhh, the Cannes film festival. You shall never find a more retched hive of scum and villiany

Re:Good idea

[TrekCycling]

Yeah, this is like the Backstreet Boys being the opening act for Yanni.... ....for those of us who like Yanni....

*slinks away*

Re:A Great Disturbance

[ackthpt]

As if a million voices cried out in Agony

No... that's when Jar Jar makes his third movie appearance.

Excuse me while I get warmed up!

nngghh! *bonk* nnggh! *bonk* nnggh! *crash* damn cheap walls around here.

Meh.

[erikharrison]

If the current trend of trailer being slightly better than the movie, and the movie being slightly better than it's predecessor continues, then we might have a movie that I would rent.

Nothing wrong with crap at the Cannes of course - they don't get to see your film first. It'll just get panned.

Re:Why open Cannes when you could crush Cannes?

[ackthpt]

I'd rather see the Sith crumple Cannes on their foreheads, personally

Yoda Sez: "Crumple YOU like cans, In Soviet Empire Sith do!"

Re:Audience Response

[TrekCycling]

Oh geez. When I saw Episode 1, someone stood on a railing and yelled to the crowd. "Everyone prepare for the greatest moment in your lives. George Lucas, the genius, is bringing back, the greatest movie series of all time."

Um....

Needless to say... never have such incorrectly words been chosen.

Episode 2 the reaction was a little clapping. I think at that point it was kind of like clapping for a kid who wears a crash helmet when he manages to tie his shoes. It was more for the effort, given the first one.

Die Jar Jar Binks!

[captjc]

I hope he dies a horrable horrable death in this movie. Infact I (and probably many others) would go to see it just for that. It would be even better if it would be a random and comical death as something from Monty Python. Just for no reason being squashed by a asteroid, foot, or large object, or being attacked out of the blue by a spam and axe wielding viking or the black (Dark Lord Sith) knight.

It would also be funny to make references to Kevin Smith films as they have made so much reference to Star Wars. Having Darth Jay and Darth Bob (Silent Palpatine) selling weed to Wookies before, during, or after the battle or show a convience store during the construction of the Death Star called the Death Stop manned by two screwed up Storm Troopers named Dante and Randal.

Re:Audience Response

[boarder8925]

I wonder what episode 3 will get.

General grieving [slashdot.org].

Also being featured...

[Master_T]

Also being featured... are films that Cannes officials have been hailing with incredibly high praise... such as:

-The art of the sellout

-The check's in the mail

-How to bribe a Frech official

-Call it a "donation"

and

-Benjamin Frankin goes to pockettown

All these great films being brought to Cannes by EA now the official owner of all rights to games based on movie licenses... and Sprite reminds you to: Obey your thirst.

I mean... come on!

whoops waiting at wrong place

[Anonymous Coward]

Damn it! Now i will have to start saving for a ticket to france. Thank god i don't have to pay rent.

Yeehaw!

[hey!]

My brother in law is a film professor. A post-modernist film professor. A post-modernist, European film professor. Well, OK he's German, but he's from west of the Rhine -- so far west he really ought to wear a beret.

Needless to say, he loathes Star Wars. No, no, he despises it.

I can't to give him the news.

dup

[Doc Ruby]

Didn't we just read "Robotic Arm Controlled By Monkey Thoughts [slashdot.org]"?

Cannes Opening Day Headline

[sconeu]

The Shit has hit the Cannes

What if

[cocoamix]

If it sucks, will Lucas have to face the Wrath of Cannes?

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[Anonymous Coward]

Do you get out much? Ever touched a girl? These are just some thoughts . . . .

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[Anonymous Coward]

Do you get out much? Ever touched a girl? These are just some thoughts . . . .

Slashdot troll questions another poster's social life; pot, kettle, total absorption of visible light.

Re:No mystery at all

[_Sprocket_]

Show me THE WOOKIE!

...wait... no. Don't.

Take all the suspense out of it, why dontchya?

[Trick]

Guess now we know which movie's going to get the prestigious Palm d'Merde this year.

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[Anonymous Coward]

Hi here is a shirt for you [target.com]

Re:This Just In!

[DrunkenTerror]

Heh, guess I shoulda tried for a joke rather than stating what apparently is the obvious. I'm mollified that so many agree with me that Cannes is "shit."

Finally I Get to See Natalie Portman's Cannes

[syntap]

Any other jokes? Or all they all done now?

Re:A Great Disturbance

[elsilver]

Don't you mean "As if a million voices cried out dans la agonie"? Non?

Re:Watching Boobs and Star Wars in Cannes

[Guppy06]

"What more does a geek want?"

Hot grits.

Dammit George!

[demonbug]

You were supposed to be making a movie, not a Cannes-Opener!

I just crack myself up.

Re:Good idea

[Evil Pete]

Can just see it. A critic reviewing it as: "a sublime parody of the Star Wars genre".

Re:What if

[Anonymous Coward]

"...I don't want to kill you; I want you to suffer - like audiences of those last two film suffered.

So, I will leave you like you left them - buried alive, BURIED ALIIIIVE..."

T.t.I.C.D.

[eomnimedia]

Oh boy, is Triumph the Insult Comic Dog [albinoblacksheep.com] going to have a field day with this one:

TtICD: "Jes, jes, and you little boy...who are you supposed to be?"

Boy (with French accent): "I am a Jedi Knight."

TtICD: "Jes, that is the best nerd costume I have ever seen...(wait for it)...FOR ME TO OUI OUI AND POUPON!"

*rimshot*

Re:Combine this with the previous story...

[vze3try7]

CANNES!!!! [khaaan.com]

*waves hand*

[sapped]

*waves hand*

This is not the movie you want to see.

Move along.

So you're saying...

[ari_j]

You're saying that the Slashdot editors deliberately misquoted you? And here we thought that the crappy article blurbs were due to crappy submissions - it turns out after all that the editors actually are editing submissions for style, content, link-checks, and so forth ... just in the wrong direction.

Re:What if

[midnightblaze]

Caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeessss s!!!!!

Re:Didn't you hear?

[Tethys_was_taken]

I'm sure there's a reason, besides crack cocaine, that parent is modded Informative.

Very sure...

Re:No mystery at all

[irokitt]

Penny Arcade reference in 3...2...1 [penny-arcade.com]

Re:LOL

[Vellmont]

You're a fanboy, but at least you're a fanboy with taste.