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Star Wars Episode III To Open Cannes 339

Posted by Zonk
from the french-wookies? dept.
bonch wrote in to mention an article on the IGN site. "The Cannes Film Festival is going to the dark side. After months of negotiations between George Lucas and festival officials, Star Wars: Episode III - The Revenge Of The Sith will open the festival in the South of France in May."
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Star Wars Episode III To Open Cannes

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  • by Jeff DeMaagd (2015) on Friday February 18, 2005 @08:35PM (#11718806) Homepage Journal
    And you'd get something like: "Monkey Brain controls the Cannes Film Festival".
  • by kaalamaadan (639250) on Friday February 18, 2005 @08:35PM (#11718808) Journal
    As if a million voices cried out in Agony
  • Ye Olde... (Score:4, Funny)

    by MorboNixon (130386) * on Friday February 18, 2005 @08:35PM (#11718809)
    Trashe cannes?
  • Good idea (Score:5, Funny)

    by Alcimedes (398213) on Friday February 18, 2005 @08:35PM (#11718812)
    We'll have Bud Light open up for Octoberfest while we're at it.



    What a frickin' joke. Unless this movie is a massive departure from the other two, it's going to be a terrible, hacked together joke. Why this would open up at Cannes is a mystery to me.

    • by TrekCycling (468080) on Friday February 18, 2005 @08:40PM (#11718850) Homepage
      Yeah, this is like the Backstreet Boys being the opening act for Yanni.... ....for those of us who like Yanni....

      *slinks away*
    • Payola
    • One could argue that the last two SW films have been Brechtian excercises in character reduction with state of the art special effects and typical Hollywood plot mechanics. If that is the case then perhaps Lucas is simultainously expressing his contept for the state of contemporary film AND pushing it further. I'm not sure that he is, but it seems plausable since I think Bruckheimer has as much as admitted that his films are intended as something slightly beyone self parody, and he hasn't nearly the cache
    • some perspective (Score:5, Insightful)

      by nobodyman (90587) on Friday February 18, 2005 @09:36PM (#11719217) Homepage
      Why not have a film like Episode III at Cannes? Let's say, worst case scenario, that the film is so bad that it makes Episode I look like Raging Bull. So What? Looks like lucas will comply with the cannes requirements [howstuffworks.com], so who cares. The only sticking point may be article 1:
      The spirit of the Festival de Cannes is one of friendship and universal cooperation.
      Its aim is to reveal and focus attention on works of quality in order to contribute to the progress of the motion picture arts and to encourage the development of the film industry throughout the world.
      But of course this is one of those "eye of the beholder" deals. Have you ever seen The Brown Bunny? Be thankful if the answer is "no". If they let that utter crap show at cannes, it would be pretentious and hypocritical to bar Episode III, or even question it's legitimacy to be shown.

    • by Evil Pete (73279) on Friday February 18, 2005 @10:02PM (#11719361) Homepage

      Can just see it. A critic reviewing it as: "a sublime parody of the Star Wars genre".

  • Like the trash can. My bad. Disregard first post.
  • But... (Score:5, Interesting)

    by CastrTroy (595695) on Friday February 18, 2005 @08:36PM (#11718819) Homepage
    But isn't Cannes supposed to be for good movies? Given the last 2 installments, I'm surprised they're showing it at all, let alone have it as the opening film.
  • I'd rather see the Sith crumple Cannes on their foreheads, personally. Aside from Alexandra Kerry's appearance last year, the festival has gotten outright preachy and boring.
  • La Dee Dah (Score:2, Interesting)

    by ackthpt (218170) *
    The Hoity-Toity will no doubt be sleepin on the sidewalk waiting for opening day.

    That would be worth seeing.

  • by s0rbix (629316) on Friday February 18, 2005 @08:38PM (#11718839)
    This just shows how those with a lot of influence and money can get their corporate "art" into an institution with high integrity. RIP Cannes... you had some good principles, but I guess nothing can last forever.
  • Cannes (Score:5, Funny)

    by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 18, 2005 @08:39PM (#11718842)
    Ahhhh, the Cannes film festival. You shall never find a more retched hive of scum and villiany
  • LOL (Score:5, Interesting)

    by Reality Master 101 (179095) <RealityMaster101@@@gmail...com> on Friday February 18, 2005 @08:39PM (#11718846) Homepage Journal
    Sorry, just laughing at the Star Wars fanboys camping out so they can be the first ones in the "universe" to see the movie. And now Lucas gives them the big BWAHAHAHAH.

    I just can't help but imagine Lucas with a big grin holding up his middle finger and giving one final F-YOU to the Star Wars geeks, followed by a "get a freaking life."

    Ahem. Sorry. In the interest of full disclosure, I have to admit that I slept overnight -- ONE NIGHT -- for Empire Strikes Back. But my friend camped out for two weeks, and I was only 30 or so people back. :)

    • Even ONE NIGHT is unacceptable
    • by irhtfp (581712)
      So let me get this straight:

      !fanboy <= 1 day camping out < fanboy

      • When I did it, it was youthful exuberance. When anyone else does it, they are pathetic fanboys. Quite simple, really. :D

        Anyway, camping out for a night is one thing; lots of people do that for special events (rose parade, concerts, etc). That's socially acceptable. And this was the sequel to Star Wars, which actually lived up to the hype. Camping out for months beforehand is way out of hand. Not to mention that there isn't exactly high expectations for the last movie.

    • Camping out for Empire Strikes Back is excusable. Camping out for any of the latest trilogy is not. So don't worry, my friend.
    • Re:LOL (Score:3, Funny)

      by Vellmont (569020)
      You're a fanboy, but at least you're a fanboy with taste.
  • by Lord Haha (753617) on Friday February 18, 2005 @08:40PM (#11718849) Homepage
    http://filmforce.ign.com/starwars/articles/588/588 920p1.html?fromint=1 [ign.com]

    Sith Opening Cannes
    Final Star Wars film set for festival debut. February 18, 2005 - Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith will open the 58th Cannes Film Festival. According to This Is London, a deal was recently struck after months of negotiations between Star Wars creator George Lucas and festival coordinators.

    Festival De Cannes takes place May 11th-22nd in the south of France.

    The UK-based website is also reporting that Ewan McGregor may be in attendance. McGregor is preparing to star in Michael Grandage's new London stage version of Guys and Dolls at the Piccadilly Theatre.

    If you're not on the Cannes guest list then you'll have to wait until May 19th (in most countries) to see Revenge of the Sith.

    The final chapter of the Star Wars prequels takes place three years after the events of Attack of the Clones. The Clone Wars are nearly at an end as the Jedi Council dispatches Obi-Wan (McGregor) to bring General Grevious, the deadly leader of the Separatist droid army, to justice. Meanwhile, back on Coruscant, Chancellor Palpatine has grown in power. His sweeping political changes transform the war-weary Republic into the mighty Galactic Empire. To his closest ally, Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christensen), he reveals the true nature of power and the promised secrets of the Force in an attempt to lure him to the dark side.
  • Isn't this about 18 days early? Yet another Star Wars Tradition Falls to George Lucas's black hole of an ego.
  • Meh. (Score:3, Funny)

    by erikharrison (633719) on Friday February 18, 2005 @08:42PM (#11718872)
    If the current trend of trailer being slightly better than the movie, and the movie being slightly better than it's predecessor continues, then we might have a movie that I would rent.

    Nothing wrong with crap at the Cannes of course - they don't get to see your film first. It'll just get panned.
  • The next Star Wars film is sure to be a hit. It's going to have the only thing missing from the previous flops: a cameo by George Lucas!
  • by captjc (453680) on Friday February 18, 2005 @08:47PM (#11718911)
    I hope he dies a horrable horrable death in this movie. Infact I (and probably many others) would go to see it just for that. It would be even better if it would be a random and comical death as something from Monty Python. Just for no reason being squashed by a asteroid, foot, or large object, or being attacked out of the blue by a spam and axe wielding viking or the black (Dark Lord Sith) knight.

    It would also be funny to make references to Kevin Smith films as they have made so much reference to Star Wars. Having Darth Jay and Darth Bob (Silent Palpatine) selling weed to Wookies before, during, or after the battle or show a convience store during the construction of the Death Star called the Death Stop manned by two screwed up Storm Troopers named Dante and Randal.
    • Am I the only one on earth that understands that Jar-Jar Binks is the reason the Empire was created? Lucas realized the character sucks, and was a complete tool. so what better use for a tool that everyone hates than to make him the patsy that gets the Emperor into power?

      If anything, I think Lucas more than justified the character. At least now we have a tangible reason to hate his guts, instead of the previous reason, which was little more than an insult to our collective intelligence.

      What would make me
  • by Master_T (836808) on Friday February 18, 2005 @08:51PM (#11718948)
    Also being featured... are films that Cannes officials have been hailing with incredibly high praise... such as:

    -The art of the sellout

    -The check's in the mail

    -How to bribe a Frech official

    -Call it a "donation"

    and

    -Benjamin Frankin goes to pockettown

    All these great films being brought to Cannes by EA now the official owner of all rights to games based on movie licenses... and Sprite reminds you to: Obey your thirst.

    I mean... come on!

  • Yeehaw! (Score:5, Funny)

    by hey! (33014) on Friday February 18, 2005 @08:54PM (#11718961) Homepage Journal
    My brother in law is a film professor. A post-modernist film professor. A post-modernist, European film professor. Well, OK he's German, but he's from west of the Rhine -- so far west he really ought to wear a beret.

    Needless to say, he loathes Star Wars. No, no, he despises it.

    I can't to give him the news.
    • It's like serving "French" fries (i.e. McDonalds) at an exotic food expo in France.
    • My brother in law is a film professor. A post-modernist film professor. A post-modernist, European film professor. Well, OK he's German, but he's from west of the Rhine -- so far west he really ought to wear a beret. Needless to say, he loathes Star Wars. No, no, he despises it. I can't to give him the news.

      That is really, really, really funny.

      Any chance you'll be able to get his reaction on video? It should be priceless.

      Now that I think of it, I'm anxious for it to actually be screened in front of a C

    • don't you mean verabscheut and verachtet?
  • by mabhatter654 (561290) on Friday February 18, 2005 @08:57PM (#11718981)
    Hey! George is an independant film-maker too. He is technically making the movie out of his owm pockets...Their very deep pockets, but at heart he's what all the little people at Canes dream of being.


    Personally, if any of the pre-press is telling us what's going on, George may finally be willing to make a PG-13 movie..and have to make a movie that can make it with the increased rating.

  • dup (Score:3, Funny)

    by Doc Ruby (173196) on Friday February 18, 2005 @09:00PM (#11719004) Homepage Journal
    Didn't we just read "Robotic Arm Controlled By Monkey Thoughts [slashdot.org]"?
  • What if (Score:5, Funny)

    by cocoamix (560647) on Friday February 18, 2005 @09:08PM (#11719059)
    If it sucks, will Lucas have to face the Wrath of Cannes?
    • If it sucks, will Lucas have to face the Wrath of Cannes?


      Yes; there is the distinct possibility that the audience will run away.

  • whoop-de-doo (Score:4, Insightful)

    by Turn-X Alphonse (789240) on Friday February 18, 2005 @09:08PM (#11719060) Journal
    So we all troll it, then we all rush to get tickets. We all know the prequals arn't great films, but we'll all still rent/buy/download them any way.

    I've seen all the Star wars films out so far (Ep 1 and 2 at the cinema) and I have to say we need to rate the prequals on a different scale. Look at them as films and not as a legacy. In short

    Ep 1= okay movie, bad star wars film
    Ep 2 = okay movie, bad sequal, bad star wars film.

    So we all scream "RAPE!" because we're ranking these things about classics, NOTHING will ever be as good as the memories you have of your favourite things, so don't compare them.
  • by Trick (3648) on Friday February 18, 2005 @09:19PM (#11719120)
    Guess now we know which movie's going to get the prestigious Palm d'Merde this year.
  • by syntap (242090) on Friday February 18, 2005 @09:27PM (#11719173)
    Any other jokes? Or all they all done now?
  • by demonbug (309515) on Friday February 18, 2005 @09:54PM (#11719318) Journal
    You were supposed to be making a movie, not a Cannes-Opener!



    I just crack myself up.

  • Star Warts (Score:2, Interesting)

    by Sundroid (777083)
    I'm old enough to remember attending the very first Star Wars movie in New York City. The excitement back then was hard to describe. It was the late 70s, Hollywood was out of fashion, and European New Wave art films were, as the kids today say, "the shit", but Lucas and an army of film school braves put Hollywood dream-making machine back on the map. Flash forward, 28 years later, Lucas's last two attempts have been textbook examples of how fancy special effects cannot save a bad movie, and now as he lim
  • Leave it to Lucas to find the only way to associate just that last little bit of (French, of course!) stink with this run of movies.

    Honestly. How about direct to DVD? It would be fan boy heaven, and think of all of the popcorn that wouldn't have to die.
  • T.t.I.C.D. (Score:4, Funny)

    by eomnimedia (444806) on Friday February 18, 2005 @10:13PM (#11719409)
    Oh boy, is Triumph the Insult Comic Dog [albinoblacksheep.com] going to have a field day with this one:

    TtICD: "Jes, jes, and you little boy...who are you supposed to be?"

    Boy (with French accent): "I am a Jedi Knight."

    TtICD: "Jes, that is the best nerd costume I have ever seen...(wait for it)...FOR ME TO OUI OUI AND POUPON!"

    *rimshot*
  • Wow, I'm pretty sure I spelled theatures really badly.

    Is anyone else just completely bored by Star Wars now?

    I still have to see it in a theature out of obligation, but I think I'll wait until it is in the cheap ones.

    Or maybe to theature hopping?

    I don't even care about spelling anymore.
  • by Anonymous Coward
    if the film is opening at Cannes, then the "simultaneous global release" thing is all shot to hell.
    If LucasFilm aren't damn careful, we'll all have it down over BitTorrent before the 30-day-campsite nerds outside the cinema get a sniff of it..
  • by sapped (208174) <.mstore1. .at. .yahoo.com.> on Friday February 18, 2005 @10:27PM (#11719495)
    *waves hand*

    This is not the movie you want to see.

    Move along.
  • as they do it on may the 4th
  • by ircShot_guN (737033) <{aflet30} {at} {eq.edu.au}> on Friday February 18, 2005 @11:15PM (#11719764)
    A Festival For Film? Wasn't star wars filmed digitally. I know that cannes has rejected many pleas to include digitally shot movies. On the plus side, perhaps this will open the way to future digitally shot entries. (Shame amature photographers and movie makers can rarely afford the transfer from digital to film!)

Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig. -- Lazarus Long, "Time Enough for Love"

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