Revenge of the Sith a "Blood Bath"

An anonymous reader writes "The BBC is reporting that the Revenge of the Sith is a blood bath and is to recieve a PG-13. One notable point from the article is Lucas is quoted as saying "But I have to tell a story. I'm not making these, oddly enough, to be giant, successful blockbusters. I'm making them because I'm telling a story, and I have to tell the story I intended." As he lit a cigar with a large stack of burning 20's."

Meesa no tink so!

[coupland]

Yuh-hunh. Sin City [imdb.com] and Kill Bill Volume 1 [imdb.com] move over, this one's a blood bath. OOOOooooo....

That's the problem with them damn Brits, they don't realize it's boobies in movies that's the real corrupting influence, not a little innocent killing and maiming.

"Nothing for you to see here. Please move along."

[GweeDo]

Freaking Jedi mind tricks...

So long as...

[DragonPup]

...Jar Jar meets a painful demise, I am happy.

The story he intended...

[TripMaster Monkey]

From TFS:

"But I have to tell a story. I'm not making these, oddly enough, to be giant, successful blockbusters. I'm making them because I'm telling a story, and I have to tell the story I intended."

Yeah...we know all about the story you intended [penny-arcade.com], George.

Irony

[Skyshadow]

Irony is: Complaining about the success of George Lucas by posting a story to a popular website about his new movie, thus providing free publicity. I wish the editors would start greenlighting stories about how badly Skyshadow sucks for having a website where he scores huge ad revenu....

(pauses, thinks)

Guys, give me twenty minutes.

I, for one...

[Stormwatch]

...would love to see Jar Jar Binks' death scene.

Re:Meesa no tink so!

[Shadow Wrought]

it's boobies in movies that's the real corrupting influence

Amongst other things. Apparantly the Queen Amidala Hot Grits scene will be on the Star Wars III, Revenge of the Sith Unrated DVD.

As he lit....

[essreenim]

a cigar with a large stack of burning 20's."

I love it when a good plan comes together.

Re:Meesa no tink so!

[millennial]

I heard something about Yoda and a greased-up doll... and the possibility that Mace Windu is gay.

Parents

[Winterblink]

Unfortunately it won't stop parents from bringing their five year screaming, whining kids to the theaters so they can throw popcorn around and kick our seat backs. Of course if the movie's as ultraviolent as everyone's making it out to be, they'll just add to the illusion of debris flying through the air and the solid punch of the subwoofer.

Natalie Portman

[essreenim]

is in it you insensitive clod. Who needs a script?

Re:Meesa no tink so!

[stlhawkeye]

That's the problem with them damn Brits, they don't realize it's boobies in movies that's the real corrupting influence, not a little innocent killing and maiming.

Not true. Swear words are also ruining American society.

Re:So long as...

[MightyMartian]

Me's so happy to be meeting with you Darth Vader.

Itsa beesa trap!

[Tackhead]

> So long as... ...Jar Jar meets a painful demise, I am happy.

Spoiler Alert: Jar Jar drowns during the MonCal Water Spectacular gurgling "OH NOES! ITSA BEESA TRAP!", while a young Ensign Ackbar holds up a sign reading "9.8".

Re:I, for one...

[theendlessnow]

...would love to see Jar Jar Binks' death scene.

I don't want to see Jar Jar dead or otherwise. How about a cremation urn in the background with a tiny disco ball hovering over it? We'll know what it is.

Re:Bzzzt

[Anonymous Coward]

"Problem Child 2"? I'd say the theater did you a favor no matter what you age was.

Re:The only way to save the franchise....

[Anonymous Coward]

"So why'd you leave Tatooine? Was it the desert?"

"No."

"The criminal element?"

"No."

"The poverty?"

"No."

"The slavery?"

"No."

"Well what was it?"

"Some jackass threw Jar Jar Binks into a pit of man-eating Sarlacc. He's been screaming 'Meesa needs help! Meesa ouchies! Help meesa!' for the last 300 years. Only 700 more to go."

Re:Ewoks were supposed to be wookies?

[http101]

I dunno, but I could have sworn I saw my ex in the scene. The staff with feathers on it and the bear-claw-laden necklace was throwing me off a little though.

Re:Bzzzt

[M.C. Hampster]

I guess statisics can be used to prove any point. :-)

Re:Itsa beesa trap!

[infonography]

Not quite, the sign reads 'It's a Trap!'

I for one...

[coolGuyZak]

Still can't believe that there was a movie with Samuel L Jackson where he didn't say the words "fuck" or "shit".

Re:Bzzzt

[MindStalker]

Highly agreed, its amazing the crap 13 year olds will buy. And people try argue that they should have adult rights in some states. HAHAHA they shouldn't have the right to buy anything without parent permission for fear that they might encourage the next Britney Spears :)

Re:So long as...

[nizo]

I said it before, and I will say it again: explosive decompression; only that will make up for earlier obnoxious Jar Jar.

But, is it a blood orgy?

[ave19]

I mean, like, satanic woodland creatures style?

The real reason for the rating.

[LabRat007]

Queen Amidala: Oh no! some invisible force has removed my clothing!! I must put on some clothing.

Degenerate Jedi: You don't need to put any clothes on (waves hand in front of face).

Queen Amidala: I don't need to put on any clothes...

Degenerate Jedi: Yeah know, they say once you go darkside you never go back.
(que cheesy sci-fi music with inappropriate back beat)


You get the idea.

Blood Bath Huh?

[simm_s]

Yes could see that! Your eyes may bleed after watching George Lucas' latest atrocity against the StarWars franchise leaving you soaked in your own blood.

-- Relax it's just a joke!

Mischaracterizing George Lucas

[kwiqsilver]

George Lucas does not use cash to light his cigars. And I really wish people would stop characterizing him as such.
He uses the $20 bills as toilet paper (due to their cottony softness). He uses orignial Shakespearean manuscripts to light his cigars.
In the future, please be more sensitive.

Re:Yeah, Right...

[Winterblink]

Oh wait for it. I'm sure this got the PG-13 rating because of this scene:

*tight closeup of lightsaber hilt*

*it tilts, revealing the engraved text: BAD MOTHER FUCKER*

*slow, cinematic pull out, revealing the lightsaber is held by Jedi Master Mace Windu (Samuel L. Jackson)*

*Windu fires a burning, seething gaze at a crowd of imperial troopers known as the Empire 88s*

*cue 15 minute long spree of death, with limbs flying everywhere, disembowelings, and (literally) fountains of blood*

Re:The first 30 minutes of the fim.

[NeuroManson]

But don't hold back, let us know how you REALLY feel.

Re:Meesa no tink so!

[FuzzyBad-Mofo]

Come to think of it, he does wield a purple lightsaber. Hmmm..

/this party's over

Re:As he lit....

[mbrewthx]

I pity the fool that doesn't go to see Star Wars!!!!

Re:Successful Blockbuster

[Gilmoure]

Olds

Is that what you yooots are calling us now?

/ Age 37 1/2

Re:I don't see how anyone is suprised

[flatland_skier]

Many Bothan's died to bring us this script! :)

Re:Successful Blockbuster

[belroth]

You young whippersnappers have no idea, you can't make a good film without someone paying the pianey in the pit at the front under the nickelodeon screen!

Re:What George Really Meant

[NaruVonWilkins]

Rolled up the script, and lit his cigar with it? I agree.

Re:Gosh! How unlike the real world

[dR.fuZZo]

To think that this movie is somehow more violent than *this* planet is amusing. It is a restless day in which somebody is not blown to smithereens in Iraq yet I am supposed to feel outraged that the new Star Wars movie earned a pg-13 rating?

I'd say the Iraq war should be rated at least an R.

Re:Bzzzt

[Ucklak]

In my day,

There was no PG-13 crap,
Drinking age was 18,
You could see Farrah Fawcett nekid in Saturn 3.

Re:Bzzzt

[__aaclcg7560]

You could see Farrah Fawcett nekid in Saturn 3.

Yeah... The only redeeming quality in that God awful movie anyway.

Re:I don't see how anyone is suprised

[Koiu Lpoi]

I did a quick search, and sadly can't find the part where Jar Jar get's decapitated. Can you help me find this? I know it's in there. It has to be in there.

Re:Successful Blockbuster

[__aaclcg7560]

If we go with our kids, it'll be because we can't find a babysitter and so decide to drag our kids along with us rather than the other way around.

When I went to see LOTR: Return Of The King during the day, a very young father brought his little girl with him so he could see the movie. Bad move. The kid was very interested in the cartoon advertisements just before the movie started, and when the first scene opened with Gollum biting into a fish, the poor kid went berserk and started balling at the top of her voice. I wondered if he ever tried to get a refund for his tickets since he didn't see the movie, and if anyone cited him for child abuse.

Re:Successful Blockbuster

[edremy]

And the Action Figures?

Don't know about anyone else, but my brother-in-law just spent 7 hours standing in line at the Star Wars convention to get a special Darth Vader action figure. He's 30, a married college grad in the Army and thus not exactly a kid.

Perhaps it has something to do with getting back from a tour of Afganistan. I think his wife hopes it was.

Re:First PG-13

[CrazyTalk]

Just showing y'all where it fits in the heirarchy - not the strongest, not the weekest.

Or, as we used to say when we were kids:

G = Good
PG = Pretty Good
R = Really Good
X = Xcellent

Re:UK Rating

[curlyjunglejake]

When the wife comes home early, and you've got a fifty-fifty shot at violence or threesome.

Re:Bzzzt

[Cpt_Kirks]

90% of all statisticians would disagree with that point.

Re:Successful Blockbuster

[gstovall]

My children (14/12/10/9) are taking me to the movie for my birthday. I've warned them it's dark, but they enjoy the Star Wars saga so much they don't care. They're just eager to see Annikin turn into Darth Vader.

**** MAJOR SPOILER WARNING!!! ****

[ylikone]

Young anakin is actually DARTH VADER!!!

Re:Bzzzt

[Anonymous Custard]

Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true!

Re:Why would PG-13 stop them?

[swv3752]

I call BS. There are so many logical contradictions in your statements. DM and cool, DM and she, DM and boobies, She and and lets play, married and DM, married and lets play, it just does not compute. though only thing that makes sense is that you don't know how pregancy works. :-P

Re:Successful Blockbuster

[javaxman]

In a single-datapoint study, I've determined that my 3-year-old thinks Jar-Jar Binks is really funny. He also really, really, wants to do a pod race.

Oh, and Qui-Gon needs to see a doctor to have his tummy fixed. These *really* aren't movies for little kids, they're actually quite dark and violent.

Upon reflection, I think Lucas knew what was coming and installed Jar-Jar in a feeble, stupid attempt to lighten things up a touch. Stupid, like I said... but I really think he's targeting the over-7 crowd. Toy manufacturers are aiming lower still, but Lucas is making some dark, messed up stuff not intended for the very young. Younger than 7 or so, seeing someone cut in half is really far from ideal. I somewhat regret agreeing to show the kid the movie, even though he seemed to deal with it quite well. I had naively thought I could show him *just* the pod race, but of course he was interested in the whole thing. I thought he'd get bored, but no such luck.

Eventually he'll ask about the funeral pyre scene and I'll have to explain that Qui-Gon didn't make it. I'm not looking forward to that, I think kids deserve to be shielded from that kind of thing for a while... of course, even Walt Disney disagrees with me on that one. Bambi was frickin' dark that way, too. Given stuff going on in the world, I may just have to accept that he's going to have to learn about human mortality earlier than I'd like.

I'm going to wait as long as possible before letting the kid watch Ep. 3, though, especially after hearing about the whole 'young jedi' thing from Kevin Smith. I'm not sure *I* want to see that myself ! Episodes 4-6 will come first, those are actually a little more kid-friendly. Just a little, though.

Re:What about the contractors?

[khallow]

No offense, but those were evil contractors. The Empire doesn't hire any other kind.

Blatantly obvious?

[TheLittleJetson]

So at the start of Episode 4, Yoda and Obi-wan are like the only Jedi still alive. This movie starts out with a bunch of Jedi living. BUT I NEVER EXPECTED A BLOOD BATH!!!!!!!!

Re:Good point

[robertjw]

I don't think the PG, PG-13, and R movie ratings are held to any degree of enforcement. They'll refuse a family and said family will go to a competitor's screens.

The point is that a 'family', or any group with an adult, can take any kids into any PG, PG-13 or R movie they want. You do bring up a good poing about people (children, whatever) yapping during a movie. It's ridiculous, every time I go to the movies lately (which isn't often) someone is talking through the whole movie. Most of the time I just don't go. Can watch the DVD at home cheaper, and it's quiet (if I can get the dogs to shut up).

One question though, what alternate universe do you live in where people tip 30-35%?????????

Re:The real reason for the rating.

[Anonymous Coward]

Only on Slashdot does the above get rated "Informative" as opposed to "Funny." :)

Re:The first 30 minutes of the fim.

[Anonymous Coward]

I won't begrudge him the darkness or the money so long as he kills all the fucking Gungans!


You may have misspelled Ewoks there, but in both cases I agree.

Anything even remotly cutsie in any of the movies should be boiled to death in a pool of their own excrement. Slowly.

Re:Meesa no tink so!

[SB5]

That's the problem with them damn Brits, they don't realize it's boobies in movies that's the real corrupting influence, not a little innocent killing and maiming.

Not true. Swear words are also ruining American society.

Fuck you.

**** ANOTHER MAJOR SPOILER WARNING!!! ****

[Anonymous Coward]

Most of you Star Wars Nerds WILL DIE ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!

Problem

[AmberBlackCat]

But how are you going to get B.A. to ride on a spaceship, Hannibal?

Re:The first 30 minutes of the fim.

[WillAffleckUW]

Should be a Gungan kill-fest. Anakin and the clone warriors and the Sith go to Jar Jar's home planet and decimate the place. I'm talking light saber decapitations and gruesome disembowelments. I'm taking Gungans being gut shot and left to die in the hot sun by storm troopers, napalm being fired into Gungan villages from AT-AT walkers, Gungans being impaled on stakes, an imperial encampment surrounded by poles bearing Gungan heads. They finish things off by nuking the planet down to the bedrock, which explains why there are no Gungans in episodes 4, 5 and 6, the Sith the proto-Empire wiped them all out.

They're saving that for the animated series on Cartoon Network ...

Re:The real reason for the rating.

[Anonymous Coward]

...
> in the privacy of my den. ;)
^^^^^^

You spelled "hand" wrong....

Re:Bzzzt

[jacksonj04]

83% of statistics are made up on the spot.

Re:As he lit....

[hal2814]

I ain't gettin in no spaceship, Hannibal! That crazy foo Murdoch'll get us all killed. I ain't going up there with that sucka!

Re:The real reason for the rating.

[Just Some Guy]

I watched it again, after the wife went to sleep, in the privacy of my den.

[plugs ears, clenches eyes tightly] LA LA LA LA LA LA LA

May the 4th ...

[Draoi]

... be with you!!

(Sorry, sorry. It only works once a year!)

Re:The first 30 minutes of the fim.

[Anonymous Coward]

Much anger I sense in you.

Re:If the level of Sex

[Meagermanx]

Hi, I'm from a little place called America.
I think that's an unfair comparison. People have been fighting bloody, dangerous, daring wars since the dawn of man. It's a natural part of our culture, our species, and our instinct. Sex, on the other hand, is dangerous, dirty, disgusting, and objectifies people. Sexual education should not be tought to our impressionable children before they turn 21, and Sexual intercourse should only be practiced to create a child, and even then nothing fancy. And if you recieve pleasure from such an act, you must immediately repent, or you, most likely, will go to Hell.
Remember, fear the lord, kill Arabs, and God bless America!

Re:Bzzzt

[Barlo_Mung_42]

"Leo's head was blocking said bush."

I'll admit that I've not seen the movie so forgive me, but wouldn't the above certainly warrant at least an R?

Re:As he lit....

[isorox]

Shut up and drink your milk

Comment removed

[account_deleted]

Comment removed based on user account deletion

Re:Bzzzt : )

[Scrameustache]

# Return of the Jedi Fox $587,871,300 1983^

These are not the chickens you are looking for...

Real thoughts for ratings

[dwhite20899]

1. PG13 Titanic = adultery, death
2. PG13 The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King = violent, magic
3. PG Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone = magic, scary
4. PG Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace = violent
5. PG13 The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers = violent, magic
6. PG13 Jurassic Park = violent
7. PG Shrek 2 = innuendo
8. PG Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets = magic, scary
9. G Finding Nemo = almost scary
10. PG13 The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring = magic, violent
11. PG13 Independence Day = violent, aliens
12. PG13 Spider-Man = violent
13. PG Star Wars = violent, threatened moviemaking ideas
14. PG Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban = magic, scary
15. PG13 Spider-Man 2 = violent
16. G The Lion King = the "cirle of life" song made up for the violence
17. PG E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial = aliens (offend southern Baptists)
18. R The Matrix Reloaded = violence, violence, too much tech, violence
19. PG13 Forrest Gump = violence, sex, Viet Nam, innuendo
20. PG13 The Sixth Sense = ghosts, head game plot ending