The Feasibility of Star Wars Tech 712
pwnage writes "Forbes Magazine, not usually the the web's premiere source of all things geekish, has posted an interesting summary of Star Wars technology and its scientific feasibility. As a bonus, they also include a great set of Star Flops, including the infamous Jedi Arena Atari 2600 video 'game.'"
What the hell? (Score:5, Funny)
Summary: (Score:1, Funny)
Oh! My Dear Lord!! (Score:5, Funny)
The Jedi Arena!! Two rectangles swinging sprites at an orange glob!!!
Christmas in the Stars!! featuring "What Can You Get a Wookiee for Christmas (When He Already Owns a Comb?)" and R2-D2 dishing out "We wish you a Merry Xmas"!!!
It all makes sense now!!!
But LUMPY!!! If I ever came up with a character name as "Lumpy", I would wilfully get eaten by a Dianoga [starwars.com]!!
cute slideshow. (Score:5, Funny)
That slideshow could make the Kessel run in less than 12 parsecs.
Hey (Score:2, Funny)
ummm (Score:2, Funny)
What the... (Score:5, Funny)
A LONG TIME AGO IN A GALAXY FAR, FAR AWAY...
It's already happened, thus it's feasability is already established.
Re:Regarding Lightsabers (Score:2, Funny)
Uh huh...And then I suppose you're going to tell me they could make a planetoid thing that can blow up other planets, too, right?
tech talk (Score:5, Funny)
And Ben Kenobi referred to laser beam swords weapons of a more civilized age.
I dunno, if blasters are supposed to be "more random", how come Jedis are still able to block their shots?
This makes as much sense as Chewbacca, a wookie, living with Ewoks on Endor.
Maybe in a thousand years . . . (Score:5, Funny)
"Twenty miles . . . twenty miles . . . twenty miles. Eight thousand cube miles of rackspace, powered by fifty sub-atomic reactors, all designed to respond to the subconcious urges of the ancient Krell web-surfers."
Stefan
Re:What the hell? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:What the hell? (Score:3, Funny)
Gluons are not what lightsabers are made of (Score:5, Funny)
Lightsabers are not lasers or simply light, they are directed concentrated energy fields that can cut better than a Ginsu knife.
A better reason for saying lightsabers are not feasible is due to the problems encountered when accidentally firing up one. Many Jedi and Sith limbs have been lost due to carelessness and showing off. Lightsaber safety is a serious issue, and people should not dismiss their potential dangers!
Re:Regarding Lightsabers (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Regarding Lightsabers (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Regarding Lightsabers (Score:3, Funny)
Just like Han Solo. Although he wasn't a Jedi, he was still DEFENDING himself! Oh, wait, nevermind....
Re:I realize we're talking about Star Wars... (Score:4, Funny)
What I want to know is: What kind of offspring do Kirk and the Green Woman have?
Re:Sounds in outer space (Score:3, Funny)
Re:I realize we're talking about Star Wars... (Score:5, Funny)
[Somewhere in space, ca 2400 AD]
"Captain, the screen reads Downloading...\|/-\|/-\|/-\|/ 37% # Connection aborted."
"Scotty, what happened down there?"
"Just a minor glitch. I'll have it repaired in about 2 hours."
"Sir, if I may interject. Sensors indicate that someone is war trekking in this part of the galaxy."
"So you're saying that someone else got the other 63% of that new guy in the red shirt? KHHAHHAHHAHHAHANN!"
Re:Regarding Lightsabers (Score:3, Funny)
New focus now that Cold War is over (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Come on! (Score:2, Funny)
Re:What the... (Score:3, Funny)
It doesn't say that Galaxy was in our Universe. Could have been in a completely different Universe where the laws of physics are slightly different, allowing for photos to interact somehow.
Maybe it takes place in the Universe where flightless birds are not affected by the laws of gravity, but witless canines are only when they realize they're not standing on solid ground.
What a great book topic! (Score:2, Funny)
Can I force-choke the web designer? (Score:4, Funny)
[Fade into dream sequence]
"You are part of the Frontpage Alliance and a hack! *cough* *choke* *gasp* [web designer's corpse thrown to the floor] "Take him away!"
[Fade out of dream sequence]
*sigh* Back to work I guess.
Re:I realize we're talking about Star Wars... (Score:5, Funny)
I... don't know. But... it would... talk like... this!
Re:Oh! My Dear Lord!! (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Gluons are not what lightsabers are made of (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Ok, at the risk of being called a moron (statio (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Regarding Lightsabers (Score:5, Funny)
Next question?
Re:Sounds in outer space (Score:3, Funny)
The Chicago Way (Score:2, Funny)
TIE fighters, atrocious spelling (Score:2, Funny)
Of course, ion engines do exist now. I want some marks back.
Also: Bob's Quick Guide to Its and It's [angryflower.com].
Re:And there's more.... (Score:2, Funny)
Re:What the hell? (Score:3, Funny)
Never underestimate the power of the FORBES
Re:What the hell? (Score:5, Funny)
I second the motion that this is a true atrocity of web design.
Re:Regarding Lightsabers (Score:1, Funny)
What are they, goldfish?
Re:Sounds in outer space (Score:1, Funny)
You betcha. Space sounds nothing like things zipping by with explosions and laser fire.
Rather, it sounds *exactly* like the Blue Danube.
In stereo.
Re:Can I force-choke the web designer? (Score:3, Funny)
Perhaps you're looking for Jockstrap.org News for oafs. Stuff that itches.
Re:Regarding Lightsabers (Score:5, Funny)
i.e. Luke learned to whine in the wild. The tots probably were trained in the ancient Jedi skills of nagging to get what they wanted.
Re:Regarding Lightsabers (Score:2, Funny)
> with blasters at all.
No, the odd thing is that they bother with light sabers. With the kind of prescience needed to pilot a pod racer and the kind of telekenesis that would be required to levitate an X-wing out of a bog, a Jedi master *ought* to be able to just walk through the middle of a blaster fight unscathed, pushing and pulling on the shooters' aim as necessary to avoid being hit. And, as Luke (a complete novice at the time) demonstrates with the little training droid ball, they ought to be able to do all that blindfolded. What do they need light sabers for?
(The answer is, of course, simple: they need light sabers for *image*. Light sabers are cool, impressive, intimidating,