7-Year Old Prequel Fan On ANH

Random BedHead Ed writes "It is a subject often pondered by Star Wars fans: what is it like to watch the six films in order with a fresh perspective? From the Desk of Ghent, On one of the Star Wars blog site's many journals, answers this question in a recent blog entry about the writer's 7-year old son, who recently watched A New Hope for the very first time. Some enlightening quotes: 'Look... Obi-Wan is pretending he doesn't know R2-D2,' and 'Why don't those ships need Hyperspace rings?' It's a pity the end of Empire has been spoiled."

yeah

[softends]

"'Why don't those ships need Hyperspace rings?'"M

Because they didn't even exist in the past in the future in the past. DUH.

You meant...

[dscho]

Future past future!

And from Empire Strikes Back

[scolby]

How did Yoda go so senile so quickly?

I know what I'd be thinking...

[Anonymous Coward]

"What happened to everybody's madd light saber skillz???"

Ah ...

[SpooForBrains]

"Why are red leader and gold leader the leaders? They don't know what they're doing..."

A question many of us have been asking ourselves ever since *we* saw it the first time ...

It's all about the droids

[Soong]

"So, does this mean that R2-D2 is really the main character in Star Wars?"

Yep. R2 is truely the most Force attuned of them all. Yoda and the other Jedi may have Midichlorians, but R2 has METAL chlorians! [guitar riff!] Excellent!

Good question.

[NIK282000]

So, does this mean that R2-D2 is really the main character in Star Wars?
Well you could ask Lucas but I doubt he would know.

Re:And from Empire Strikes Back

[__aaclcg7560]

If your pension paid only enough to live in a slimy mud hole after living your life in top of an ivory tower, you would be senile too. The dark side of being a retired Jedi... :P

Re:It's all about the droids

[Jace of Fuse!]

R2 has METAL chlorians! [guitar riff!]

Yeah, but George Lucas has MENTAL chlorians!

Re:Ah ...

[ScrewMaster]

"turbolaser cannon fodder"

Re:Bad Acting

[Anonymous Coward]

I think arthritis set in for Obi-Wan and Darth Vader. Remember they're much older now. Too bad their light saber didn't double as a walking stick.

Re:And from Empire Strikes Back

[Hogwash McFly]

You mean, 'then he turned to pot'...

Re:That seals it

[Anonymous Coward]

And how would you expect to react when finding out that your wife died? By softly whispering, "yes" and then doing the moonwalk?

Where is Qui-Gon?

[mre5565]

Answer: George didn't think of till it till after the latest re-release of a A New Hope. Don't worry, George will digitally add Qui-Gon and dialog with Obi_wan when the 3D version comes out.

It's all about more money for George.

Re:It's all about the droids

[sdo1]

That's how he can ignore the millions of voices that cried out in pain upon the release of Episode I ... and were suddenly silenced

Silenced?

Darth Vader's prosthetic penis.

[CyricZ]

When Anakin started to burn up after losing most of his limbs, it is quite possible that his penis was severely burned. Considering that he was engulfed in flames, it is probably safe to say that his penis and scrotum were literally quite gone. Now, my question is, did the Emperor install a prosthetic, mechanical penis onto Darth Vader?

Ewok with a stick

[AHumbleOpinion]

The more important question is why do they wear armor that can't even take one hit.

From a blaster or an Ewok with a stick?

Re:And from Empire Strikes Back

[Hatta]

If your pension paid only enough to live in a slimy mud hole after living your life in top of an ivory tower, you would be senile too. The dark side of being a retired Jedi... :P

Don't you mean:

If slimy mudhole after living your life in the top of an ivory tower your pension paid only enough to live in, senile you would be too"

Re:That seals it

[Anonymous Coward]

Moonwalk? Hell I'd get my full on booty shakin' on then I'd be all callin' that cute little 19 year old and sayin stuff like hey baby turns out I'm free for a while you wanna get together and bump uglies and she'd be all hell yeah and your my daddy and shit and then we'd be ON TEH SPOKE and she'd help me out with my greased yoda insertions.

Re:That seals it

[Anonymous Coward]

And how would you expect to react when finding out that your wife died? By softly whispering, "yes" and then doing the moonwalk?

Hmm. My wife? ...

Just kidding, honey!

Re:That's what I was saying.

[OmgTEHMATRICKS]

"So until he saw the message from Leia and knew it was not a trap of some sort, he had to maintain his cover."

Ackbar: It's a trap!
Leia: No it's not.
Ackbar: Oh.

If...

[hummassa]

you are implying that the Dark Side is a gay conspiracy, then you are being very, very naughty. :-)

Re:That's what I was saying.

[Gleng]

Exactly. I doubt I'd remember my family's washing machine from 20 years ago if I saw it again.

Re:Yeah, so hard to cheer for Rebellion anymore..

[h3llfish]

You are more bound to side with the good folks who:

- killed kids
- enslaved the wookies
- destroyed the weaponless planet Alderaan
- yada yada yada

You MUST be a Republican. Heil Bush!

Re:That seals it

[Adrilla]

And how would you expect to react when finding out that your wife died? By softly whispering, "yes" and then doing the moonwalk?

robert blake did.

OH FOR GODs SAKE!!!

[THEUBERGEEK]

OK people, pay attention and learn something There have been tech advances in the 20 years since the "end" of eps 3 and the start of 4 Obi-Wan did not "recognize" R2D2 because he was not supposed to let on what had been happening, obviously he had been training himself to hide from Vader. Uncle Owen did not recognize C3PO because threepio did not have coverings when he was on that farm previously. In additon there are probably MILLIONS of similar protocol droids, recall the one that threepio ran into on Bespin? Vader walked like "frankenstein" because he was 1) in pain, 2) using new prostheses 3) probably having problems breathing He shouted NNNOOOOO!!!! because he went through everything he did in order to SAVE his wife and yet he has been told HE killed her. Would eny of you done differently? AND FINALLY>>>> you people need to quit trying to apply EARTH and HUMAN values and concepts to what is supposed to be an ALIEN and NON_TERRAN society, these people were not meant to think like you and me, their culture is considerably different than the USofA

Re:yeah

[debilo]

I've had a post go from +5 insightful to 0 flamebait in 6 hours. The moderation system is broken.

True. How did it get 5, Insightful in the first place?

Wookie Survivors

[Servo5678]

- "Is Chewbacca the only Wookiee that survives the Clone Wars?" (with great concern)

No, there is another.

Re:yeah

[NoData]

In reality this makes perfect sense.

Hahahahah. Truly, Friday night Slashdot is the purest form of Slashdot.

Re:And from Empire Strikes Back

[rubycodez]

.....until he was 900 years old, when sadly the Imperial Supreme Court ruled the Empire's authority to ban medicinal pot superceded any planetary laws allowing use; whereupon Yoda quickly faded away.

Re:That seals it

[The One and Only]

Pop quiz. Star Wars is:

(a) Cheesy fiction.
(b)Real.

Re:That seals it

[rawb]

Vader on Wheel of Fortune [ytmnd.com]
NOOOOlercoaster [ytmnd.com]
Vader on the Internet [ytmnd.com]
The starfox crew, and Vader, mourn Fox's death [ytmnd.com]
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO [ytmnd.com]
Vader, Paddle, NOOOO [ytmnd.com]
Vader loses his Stapler [ytmnd.com]
Vader wants to be a millionaire [ytmnd.com]
CNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO! [ytmnd.com]
Vader's NOO dance [ytmnd.com]
The price is not Vader [ytmnd.com]
The King teaches Darth Vader about the Truth [ytmnd.com]
Vader gives his son the talk [ytmnd.com]
I am your father [ytmnd.com]
Lindsay Lohan NOOO [ytmnd.com]
Vader makes a YTMND [ytmnd.com]
Vader vs Chapelle NOOO [ytmnd.com]
The Knights who say NOOOO [ytmnd.com]
Vader joines Destiny's Child [ytmnd.com]
Bohemian Vader [ytmnd.com]
Where everybody KNOOOOOOOOOWs Your Name [ytmnd.com]
Vader Ice Cream [ytmnd.com]


I think thats quite enough actually... laugh

Re:Children and RotS

[Cruciform]

Meanwhile your family has gone through 634 mattresses and 853 pairs of bedwetting diapers :P

Re:OH FOR GODs SAKE!!!

[Anonymous Coward]

No, it doesn't stop there. It's just that only evil exists beyond there. I thought our president explained that to everyone!?

Re:Wookie Survivors

[happyslayer]

Which brings up my thought during ROTS: Chewbacca went from being a mighty general who fought with Yoda to a smuggler who hangs out in Moes-Eisly space port. What dark path did he follow?

• Selling Meth to the Ewoks?
• Smuggling Ridlin in for the Jawas?
• And then there were those movies a few years ago that he just doesn't want to talk about...but he needed the money.

Re:yeah

[tha_mink]

Not to mention the fucking *CONTENT*

Jesus fucking christ...I like computers and all but I didn't sign up for this Star Wars freak shit.

Kill me.

Re:yeah

[bt3]

hahaha, yeah, that cracked me up in the first two movies.

"Anakin will bring balance to the force"

Lessee, there are like ten zillion Jedi and two Sith.

I guess they don't teach any math at the Jedi Academy.

It's Only A Flesh Wound

[Ranger]

After watching the final fight scene in Episode III between Obi Wan and Anakin, was anyone else reminded of King Arthur's fight with the Black Knight [rit.edu] in Monty Python and the Holy Grail? Oh, well. Sith happens.

Re:Darth Vader's prosthetic penis.

[Anonymous Coward]

Yes [blogspot.com].

Re:Edited Episode 6 - New Ending

[(el)Capitan.Nick]

It fills me with a fury that can only be compared to that of a fairly angry person.

Re:yeah

[PsiPsiStar]

Shit I sound like a star wars geek, I am not

Even worse, you sound like a Starwars geek in denial.

Re:Darth Vader's prosthetic penis.

[payndz]

When Anakin started to burn up after losing most of his limbs, it is quite possible that his penis was severely burned. Considering that he was engulfed in flames, it is probably safe to say that his penis and scrotum were literally quite gone.

Alternate dialogue from ROTS:

Vader: Padme... is she all right?
Emperor: She's fine. But really, I'd forget about her if I were you.
Vader: Why?
Emperor: Look down.
Vader: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Any Asimov fans in the audience?

[ggvaidya]

R2D2 = R. Daneel Olivow?

Okay, *THAT* I did not see coming ...

Re:There are only two answers to that question.

[vertinox]

So, which do you prefer? :)

A recent poll of humans found they gave either these two answers:

1.) If I am in charge, then a dictatorship.

2.) If not, then democracy is fine.