G.I. Joe No Longer the Real American Hero?

Advocate123 writes "Clearly, Hollywood has forgotten the, 'Real American Hero.' G.I. Joe originally symbolized the American WWII soldier and a great generation. Now Hollywood celebrities are going to turn him into a international multicultural coed task force with no government affiliations. Isn't anything sacred to these people?"

Wanted to post a non-RightWingWacko version of TFA

[Anonymous Coward]

...but FOX News [foxnews.com] had the only other one I could find. =(

Still better than the crap in the submission.

In other news....

[MonorailCat]

President Bush has signed a $100 million appropriations bill to supply soldiers in Iraq with red lasers.

Damn It!

[rossz]

Now those bastards are turning him into a euro-pussie. They already have Ken, what more do they want?

Re:In other news....

[MagusSlurpy]

Well, now, that's good news, but when is he going to send them the sharks?

And I, for one, welcome. . .

[MagusSlurpy]

Our new international multicultural coed overlords!

Re:Old News

[the_humeister]

Wait, you mean Cobra-La wasn't a real nation???

the hurt . . .

[LiquidHAL]

i'm rolling my eyes as hard as i can. it hurts, but i dare not stop.

Re:Damn It!

[wamerocity]

Are you suggesting that a Greenpeace Soldier action figure would not be manly?!

Re:Damn It!

[Anonymous Coward]

Well, hey it's a new century. Everybody can go metro at the drop of a hat at least pretend to. Anyways my point being is that soldiering is boring without a little sex added to the mix. Just imagine finding out if Snake Eyes is really deformed and the only one who knows is the Scarlet Witch whose been doing him, Duke, and Cobra Commander on the side. It makes military, mercenary, and overall killer jobs a whole lot more interesting than going to a foriegn place and wacking some moron. Nothing says nothing like a little killin' and a little sex mixed in a foriegn country. Do you agree?( I'm just playing around but kinda serious but not really in a tired, out of my mind with fatigue type roundabout way. Apologies for the lunacy. It's Friday!).

Re:Damn It!

[rossz]

A greenpeace action figure would eat tofu, wear earth shoes, and run screaming like a school girl at the first sign of any real danger.

What?

[Anonymous Coward]

Your comment is nearly incoherent. It looks as if you've been cutting and pasting random quotes from some sort of badly translated alternate history comic book.

Re:Mmm, bias

[Jah-Wren Ryel]

Hollywood limousine liberal idiots are exceeding my patience. I can handle their unabashed socialism, even their global warming insanity, but when they attack G.I. Joe, enough is enough.

If GI Joe can't fight off a bunch of 'limousine liberals' then he is already a pussy.

Re:No...

[poopdeville]

I've got a bad feeling that Jerry Bruckheimer, Michael Bay, Uwe Boll, or W.S. Anderson is going to direct. This has the potential to make Team America: World Police the world's first parody of a chronologically later film.

Grammatical error!

[Bieeanda]

Some random person's screechy blog is news by nerds, not news for nerds.

Re:Damn It!

[gwaawg]

lol! first Jesus Christ and now G.I. Joe.... Those darned Europeans.

Fuck GI Joe!

[coaxial]

He's no hero. [salon.com] He always let Cobra Commander -- the leader of a ruthless terrorist orgainization determined to rule the world -- get away. A real leader like George W. Bush would never let that happen [csmonitor.com].

Hollywood even tried to make Tomatos "evildoers"

[UncleWilly]

with Attack of the Killer Tomatos

G.I. Joe as he should be remembered

[commodoresloat]

WTF is up with this article? Some wingnut freeper whining in his blog about the demise of G.I. Joe? Get a grip (yeah, like the GI Joe with the Kung Fu Grip). I present you GI Joe's real finest moments:

• cooking [youtube.com]
• singing [youtube.com]
• protecting intellectual property [youtube.com]

Chuck

[chiller2]

So they emasculated GI Joe? We still have Chuck Norris. Balls of steel!

Re:Don't these rightwing bozos understand ....

[1u3hr]

Incorrect, gripping hands make him an action figure. Looks at Ken's hands then look at Joe's.

So Joe grips Ken?

Re:In other news....

[hoppo]

All I want is sharks with frickin laser beams, and you have to bog me down with all these details.

And Jordan Carlos, as "Alan"

[Scrameustache]

I can't help but shudder at the thought of complaints from minority groups if there weren't any token blacks/Hispanics/etc. Personally, I find characters whose sole purpose is to stand up and scream "look at me, I'm not white!" to be rather annoying.

That's why the black guy always dies first: they didn't want him in the first place.

On the flipside, Lando [suite101.com] WAS awesome, as a space pimp ought to be.

Re:Old News

[Anonymous Coward]

I would support a war against CORBA.

Re:Damn It!

[hollywoodb]

Dude, it was called the "Rainbow Warrior". Everyone knew it was going to go down.

Re:Damn It!

[hawk]

Oh, c'mon.

France was *desperate* for a military victory after 900 years . . . :)

hawk