The Secret History of Star Wars

lennier writes "How exactly did George Lucas develop the script for the first Star Wars? Why were the prequels so uneven when the originals were so good? Did he really have a masterplan for six, nine, or even twelve episodes, and why did the official Lucasfilm position keep changing? And just how big an influence were the films of Akira Kurosawa on the whole saga? Michael Kaminski's The Secret History of Star Wars, Third Edition is a free, thoroughly unauthorized, e-book that brings together a huge amount of literary detective work to sort fact from legend and reveal how the story really evolved. Download it or have your nerd credentials revoked."

nerd credentials?

[OrangeTide]

"Download it or have your nerd credentials revoked."

I like programming in my spare time, when I'm not programming at work. But I hate Star Wars. I guess I'm just not nerdy enough.

I will have to hand write some PostScript to print my own nerd credentials and post them on my cubical wall.

Re:nerd credentials?

[kylehase]

In addition to your credential revocation, your impressive /. ID will be reset to the current new user value.

Re:nerd credentials?

[Elrond, Duke of URL]

124937? It's just sad what passes for impressive these days. Have you all become so jaded?!?

Re:nerd credentials?

[CrazedWalrus]

Picking up women.

(... who need their computers fixed.)

Re:nerd credentials?

[Ai Olor-Wile]

Bonus points if the PostScript puts it up on the wall for you.

Re:nerd credentials?

[JetJaguar]

Yeah, I couldn't agree more.

Re:Cult of Lucas. I don't get it.

[_Shad0w_]

The way Obi-Wan looks at Luke when he first sees the holo recording from Leia makes a lot more sense when you find out they're brother and sister.

Re:nerd credentials?

[Raul654]

I'm sorry, we're revoking your math license. [xkcd.com]

Re:nerd credentials?

[Anonymous Coward]

Do you oldfags. I mean, long time members just lurk and wait for posts like this?

Re:nerd credentials?

[kfort]

tag you're it

Dude, where's my Jar Jar?

[fahrbot-bot]

Why were the prequels so uneven when the originals were so good?

By the time the prequels were made, Lucas could afford good Crack and Weed.
(How else does one explain Jar Jar? "Meesa so high...")

I don't know if its the writing style or what...

[Adambomb]

But was anyone able to get past the introduction without the whole thing starting to narrate in ones head with the Simpson's Comic Book guy voice?

Re:nerd credentials?

[OrangeTide]

"I'm all for learning more about things."

Well for lunch I had some beef ball soup at TK Noodle over in Cupertino. It was pretty good, cheap and the service was slow. But otherwise satisfying. And yesterday I had to change my password at work. Damn 60-day password rotations and crazy ActiveDirectory crap. I want my 10+ character random letter and number passwords to be something I can pass down to my grandchildren. Oh and some more information, I am considering going to Muir woods, but can't decide if the memorial day weekend traffic would be bad. (I didn't even realize Memorial Day was even coming up soon). I wonder if I should hang out a flag. I'd have to buy one first (made in china).

There, you learn something every day. And just like after seeing Episode I, I want that wasted portion of my life back.

Re:nerd credentials?

[JetJaguar]

Listen up, you whipper snapper! What you are witnessing is a very sophisticated and nuanced art of gamesmanship that is only understood by people with uid's less than 10,000.

So go back to sleep and let the real men get on with their business.

Re:Does anybody really care?

[Omestes]

Just wait until the Star Wars Trek... Or was it the Star Trek Wars?

Re:nerd credentials?

[PCM2]

Jesus Christ, will you guys keep it down?? Some of us are trying to sleep, here. Whoever invited these guys with IDs greater than four digits needs to explain to his friends that this is not that kind of party, they need to bring their own beer, and YES, the girls will be perfectly fine until they get back from the liquor store.

Re:Oh please

[kungfoolery]

Exactly! Who would actually give credence to this 'star wars program'? I mean, this would be as ridiculous as striking down hypersonic projectiles down with a beam of light, or something...

Re:nerd credentials?

[CronoCloud]

You really play nethack in a dark basement, admit it.

Doesn't everyone?

Re:nerd credentials?

[CronoCloud]

Next thing you'll say is that you're a sysadmin who "doesn't" play Nethack

What's the world coming to, "when the world is mine, your death will be quick and painless."

Re:nerd credentials?

[LKM]

Today, I learned something about Americans. Thank you, sir. I find your ideas intriguing and wish to subscribe to your blog.

Re:nerd credentials?

[Gandalf]

*Four* digits? Wow, this site sure has grown during my trip to New Zealand.

Re:nerd credentials?

[maelstrom]

Quiet you.

Re:nerd credentials?

[somersault]

I am not a number - I am a man!

Oh wait, I'm number 5. In your face number 6!

Re:Oh please

[LordSnooty]

Have real life people been killed because of it?

Not killed, but this guy [bbc.co.uk] got pissed off enough to dress up as Darth Vader...

Re:Does anybody really care?

[ultranova]

As Stanley Schmidt, the current editor of Analog magazine said "Star Wars is just cowboys and Indians set in space".

Yeah, and without any of that politically correct Noble Savage bullshit the more recent westerns are full off. That's what makes SW great.

Re:nerd credentials?

[Yvanhoe]

Just recognize me as a mad scientist genius and we are all set...

You all get dork-creds

[terbo]

For finding various things to nit-pick over, while not addressing the original purpose of the article.

(I know, I do it too ...)

*This is not the post you are willing to moderate*
(slowly waves hand)

Re:nerd credentials?

[Anonymous Coward]

>have touched boobs! irl!

I guess that's why they call you happydan.

Re:nerd credentials?

[Seindal]

You people sure know how to make a man feel like a loser :-(

Re:nerd credentials?

[troc]

yes.

We spend every waking hour running scripts that look for an opportunity to flaunt our 3 or 4 digit IDs because we naturally have no life.

Re:nerd credentials?

[Omestes]

We really need an ISO standard for this.

But the way things are going it would end up with only Window's users being the cool kids. With the OS X users being the leper colony, and all the rest being the modern equivalent of untouchables, though we might get a badly supported plug-in someday.

Re:Does anybody really care?

[somersault]

Yeah I had thought he was a carpenter before Star Wars as well. Just like Jesus!

Re:nerd credentials?

[LynXmaN]

I remember the good old times, when in order to post to Slashdot I had to walk 50 miles uphill, both ways!

Now get off my lawn!!!

Re:nerd credentials?

[Anonymous Coward]

Yer tellin me...

Re:nerd credentials?

[Anonymous Coward]

IF you had scripts doing the dirty work of parsing all posts for opportunities, you'd have plenty of time for a life... Or make grilled-cheese hamwiches.

Re:nerd credentials?

[drinkypoo]

the girls will be perfectly fine until they get back from the liquor store

...mostly because they're unlikely to be impressed by an in-depth discussion of the origins of Star Wars, or the reasons why vi is superior to emacs or vice versa.

Re:nerd credentials?

[chill]

WTF do you think GPS was invented for? It was a couple of scientists who had managed to land hot girlfriends/wives and needed to make sure they could find their way home. They just sold it to the military to get someone else to pay for the satellite launches.

Get thee to an electronics store!

Re:Does anybody really care?

[Anonymous Coward]

Yeah I had thought he was a carpenter before Star Wars as well. Just like Jesus!

And Han Solo did throw the first "stone" :p

Re:nerd credentials?

[Talderas]

Recipe for Free Mod Points:

1. Wait for someone to make post about how a 100k UID is low.
2. Post using your 10k UID.
3. Wait for others to post their UIDs lower than you.
4. Wait for Funny upmods.
5. ????
6. Profit!

Re:nerd credentials?

[Anonymous Coward]

with a really hot, fit girlfriend, with a brain that cooks cleans and likes to have sex with me three to four times a week.

Maybe one day you will convince her body to do these things instead of just her brain.

Re:nerd credentials?

[MistrBlank]

You feel like a loser? I've been reading /. for something like 7 or 8 years now and look at my id.... Yeah I'm an idiot for not signing up sooner.

Re:nerd credentials?

[Anonymous Coward]

have touched boobs! irl!

How did she react when she woke up?

Re:nerd credentials?

[Timinithis]

I am quite proud of my number.

This is my number.
There are many like it, but this one is MINE.
  My number is my best friend. It is my life.
  I must master it as I must master my life.
My number without me is useless. Without my number, I am useless.
  I must fire my number true.
  I must shoot straighter than my enemy who is trying to Karma-Whore me.
  I must flame him before he flames me. I will...
  My number and myself know that what counts in flame wars is not the replies we fire,
  the noise of our bursts, nor the smoke we make.
We know it is the hits that count. We will hit...
My number is human, even as I, because it is my life.
  Thus, I will learn it as a brother.
  I will learn its weaknesses, its strengths, its parts, its accessories,
  its sights, and its karma.
I will ever guard it against the ravages of weather and damage.
  I will keep my number clean and ready, even as I am clean and ready.
  We will become part of each other. We will...
  Before God I swear this creed.
  My number and myself are the defenders of my geekdom.
  We are the masters of our enemy.
  We are the saviors of my life.
So be it, until there is no enemy, but .
        -- With Respects to : Maj Gen WH Rupertus

Nerd priveleges

[bkr1_2k]

I gave up my nerd credentials years ago. I choose to retain my "geek" credentials though.

If you don't understand the difference, you really are a nerd.

Re:nerd credentials?

[bkr1_2k]

That's because everyone else is at the other parties. There's definitely nothing like a party alone, I'll agree there.

Re:nerd credentials?

[bkr1_2k]

I've seen his mom, and I wouldn't be too proud of that if I were you.

Re:nerd credentials?

[Atriqus]

Really? Because I felt like a loser for signing up. :)

Re:nerd credentials?

[Anonymous Coward]

I was here before all of y'all!

Re:nerd credentials?

[Falrick]

Speak for yourself. Those of us below 1000 are soooo above such childishness as to tout our low uid, especially when those uid's are clearly superior to yours.

Yes! Now to lie in wait for the next opportunity to strut and posture and assert my god like prowess!

Re:nerd credentials?

[Ihmhi]

Will you guys keep it quiet?! I have preschool in the morning!

Re:nerd credentials?

[Shorts Eater]

These people (Cmnd Taco and Cowboy Neal) look deep within my soul and assign me a number based on the order in which I joined.

Re:nerd credentials?

[spun]

He's the guy I created first, before I came back a few months later.

When did /. become a MMORPG?

Worst. MMORPG. Evar.

Re:nerd credentials?

[Pollardito]

that recipe would only work for someone old enough to have a 10k UID or lower, the rest of us have too short an attention span to follow that many steps

Re:nerd credentials?

[jd]

Girls... yes, I do believe I have heard the word used in reference to some members of the population. Never encountered any.

Re:nerd credentials?

[_Sprocket_]

That's because you just don't understand the magic system or how to manage aggro.