RIAA Filed 62 New Cases In April Alone 243
NewYorkCountryLawyer writes "Based upon a quick examination of the records in PACER, I detected 62 new cases brought by the RIAA against individuals in the month of April alone. In December, 2008, the RIAA had represented to Congress that they had 'discontinued initiating new lawsuits in August [2008].'"
Surprising (Score:5, Funny)
They've gone to the reverse psychology defense (Score:5, Funny)
Perhaps... (Score:5, Funny)
... they discontinued initiating lawsuits on August 31st and started right up again on September 1st. Everyone needs a few hours off now and then. =)
They were technically telling the truth (Score:3, Funny)
While they were in front of Congress, they had stopped filing lawsuits... because their mobile broadband connection wasn't working. As soon as they returned to the office, they started again.
Re:They were technically telling the truth (Score:3, Funny)
Nope. Believe it or not, they were telling the truth, and it still applies. This is possible due to a little-known law enacted in the summer of 1837, which states that lawsuits are not really considered to be lawsuits, if they're brought against defenseless pensioners who have no idea what the charge means, much less how to defend themselves against it.
Re:Surprising (Score:5, Funny)
"Normal, 'thinking' people" can arrive at drastically different conclusions. See Conservative v. Liberal v. Libertarian.
Wait, why are you talking about thinking people in the first sentence and then switch to a totally different topic in the second one?
Re:They were technically telling the truth (Score:5, Funny)
Nope. Believe it or not, they were telling the truth, and it still applies. This is possible due to a little-known law enacted in the summer of 1837, which states that lawsuits are not really considered to be lawsuits, if they're brought against defenseless pensioners who have no idea what the charge means, much less how to defend themselves against it.
Thank you so much for the explanation; I never would have known.
And here I thought Mitch Bainwol was a lying, yellow bellied piece of garbage.
Boy did I have him wrong.
Re:Well, who saw that coming... (Score:1, Funny)
>>>>> I hereby propose that anybody over the age of 18 who uses a moniker of "D_Jedi" has to slink away from normal people.
Already done- That's why he's on Slashdot...
Wheat germ and chessboard. (Score:5, Funny)
Poor innocent RIAA-tan [blogspot.com] will never catch all the piracy scofflaws using this time-consuming serial approach. Hasn't she ever heard of multi-level marketing? Or the classic wheat and chessboard problem [wikipedia.org]? It's simple.
They need to sue the bejeesus out of someone, and offer to settle by forcing the person to buy the rights to a minor song, and then requiring that that person protect their rights by suing two other people. And those two other people will have to settle by each suing two other people, and so on, and so on.
Eventually everyone will wind up being sued, but at least having nice smelling hair [youtube.com].
Re:Surprising (Score:1, Funny)
Rules? Who's rules? Your rules? What gives you the right to impose your rules on me?
I don't need any rules. The rules are great for keeping YOU in line. Rules are great for keeping YOU from bothering me. But don't ever assume YOUR rules apply to me. I don't need them, because I'm fine. YOU follow the rules, and leave me the hell alone.
--The general consensus among the populace if they were ever really honest with themselves. Seriously, when was the last time you heard a senator or congressman say "We have to pass this bill! It will protect ME from myself!"
Re:Surprising (Score:2, Funny)
Re:The RIAA didn't really promise anything... (Score:5, Funny)
First, it doesn't say that the RIAA "stopped" doing anything. To "discontinue" does not mean to "stop," it means "to break the continuity of."
Quickly! We need to repaint all the octagonal red signs in this country to say "DISCONTINUE MOTION."
Otherwise I predict severe, permanent traffic problems.
Re:The RIAA didn't really promise anything... (Score:3, Funny)
You just have to get more familiar with the lingo, Ray. They have discontinued the practice of bringing "new" lawsuits, but will indeed continue in the finely honed craft of suing the living shit out of John Doe.
So i.e. they're still working on perfecting the "old" one, which had never been well crafted in its inception?
Or it could be that they will no longer initiate lawsuits in August. Company vacation time and whatnot.
I see, they discontinued suing in August, but will continue suing September through July?
Besides, does anyone REALLY want to argue that the definition of those words are really all that concrete? Those are GOOD words. Good words are like good whores--just don't think they won't put on a completely different show for the next customer at the same price.
I see that your time here at Slashdot has been productive, and served you well, and that you have learned the wisdom of the ancient ones. Thank you for sharing. I think I understand now.
Cowboy Neal is writing their press releases.