OpenStreetMap Sends UK Volunteer Mapper To Antigua 52
Gerv writes "When Google launched their Map Maker community mapping tool last year, they included loads of Caribbean islands. This led Ed Parsons (chief Google Maps guy) to say that he was sad there wasn't any fieldwork involved. Well, now OpenStreetMap have gone one better — following a successful Pledgebank pledge, they have got together the money to send one randomly-chosen guy to Antigua for a week to work on the OpenStreetMap map!"
Less Successful Field Work Ideas (Score:5, Funny)
Let me be the first (Score:2, Funny)
They don't mention it but... (Score:5, Funny)
Ambiguous Title (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Ambiguous Title (Score:3, Funny)
I not only thought that but also, "I hope they paid his airfare". It was quite disappointing to find out that they did.
Re:They don't mention it but... (Score:3, Funny)
Au contraire, mon frere.
This is no "randomly chosen" bloke Google is sending to Antigua for some kind of mapping exercise. That's just what they want you to think. This is a Special Envoy of Googol the Destroyer [slashdot.org].
So what was Stallmanx working on in his secret laboratory? And what lies beneath his Beard of Druidic Prowess? Answers to these questions and more in this week's episode of Googol the Destroyer!
The truth is that the secret laboratory of the roving druid Stallmanx is in Antigua (which is why he doesn't need to wear shoes). Stallmanx has finally completed what he was working on in his laboratory, and contacted Googol the Destroyer for an audience -- but being a savvy druid, he requested that Googol send an envoy to him, so he wouldn't be caught in Googol's clutches.
The Special Envoy meets with Stallmanx in his secret laboratory, and asked, "You requested this audience. Why?"
"I think I've solved a problem. Googol the Destroyer is intent on wreaking the End of Days via the Rite of a Thousand Target Ads, but it's going to destroy humanity. I want to be a part of the winning side, so I've had a license drawn up to share the Rite."
The Acolyte drew back... this was puzzling. How could he manage to maintain his Master's desire for all knowledge if he restricted his actions via a license? He knew that he had to defer to his Master on this one... and so, with a quick input into his specially adapted G-phone, he summoned Googol the Destroyer to the secret laboratory.
"MORTAL!" thundered Googol, "WHY AM I HERE?"
Stallmanx stood bravely in the face of the most evil demon ever to hatch from the depths of the internet. "I have a license for you to sign, to bring me and my followers in to the Googol fold. Please read and sign on pages 3, 7, 8, 12, 12a, Appendix C, and Addendum 2." Stallmanx hoped Googol wouldn't read the whole license... for it contained a poison clause that would force Googol to share his true name with all the others who were signatories to the license, thus granting them power over him.
Googol conjured a pen and began reading the contract. "WHAT? I NEED TO RENAME MYSELF AS GNU-GOOGOL THE DESTROYER? THAT'S RIDICULOUS. I mean, really, how menacing is a Gnu? I might as well rename myself Antelope-Googol the Destroyer, or Mouse-Googol the Destroyer. Screw that, if you really wanted me to sign, you should have worded it "lion-Googol the Destroyer, or at the very least Wildebeest-Googol the Destroyer." And so Googol conjured a flaming cage of iron (thankfully, the flames were for appearance only, and burned at a comfortable 25 degrees C) and dropped it over Stallmanx.
"MWUA-HA-AH! NOW ONLY JOBA AND GATUS CAN OPPOSE ME!" Googol rumbled as he winked out, taking his Acolyte with him.
Little did Googol know, that Stallmanx had been working off the internet, and so Googol did not know all his secrets. He mumbled to himself (apparently), "Boys, come on out. You've got to help me escape this cage. Go fetch my mistletoe and wooden bowl so I can grow a key to unlock this cage, that is, if you show me how. Please?"
And to no one's amazement (since there was no one else there), three small gnomes climbed out from underneath Stallmanx's beard to fetch his bowl and mistletoe.
Stallmanx was already planning an alternate to subverting Googol. "And while you're at it, can you re-write the license for Gatus and Joba? We've no choice but to join their side."
And so, gentle reader, we have learned what Stallmanx was working on, and that it is actually three Beard Gnomes that live beneath his Beard of Druidic Prowess -- and that the Beard Gnomes are the source of his knowledge.
But what of Gatus and Joba? How goes Gatus's plan to Embrace and Extend the sorcerors he can bu
Re:Less Successful Field Work Ideas (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Ambiguous Title (Score:3, Funny)
They'd have to update the airport locations in real time.
Airports don't tend to move particularly fast relative to their surroundings.