ASCAP Wants To Be Paid When Your Phone Rings 461
Posted
by
kdawson
from the don't-even-think-about-whistling-the-beatles dept.
from the don't-even-think-about-whistling-the-beatles dept.
gerddie notes a piece up on the EFF site outlining the fairly outlandish legal theories ASCAP is trying out in their court fight with AT&T. "ASCAP (the same folks who went after Girl Scouts for singing around a campfire) appears to believe that every time your musical ringtone rings in public, you're violating copyright law by 'publicly performing' it without a license. At least that's the import of a brief (PDF, 2.5 MB) it filed in ASCAP's court battle with mobile phone giant AT&T."
Someone... (Score:5, Funny)
...needs a cup of tea and a lie down
RIAA (Score:5, Funny)
Even if ASCAP doesn't win, the RIAA will sue for your phone to see if you have any illegal downloaded ring tones.
One cannot help but wonder . . . (Score:5, Funny)
. . . why these people have not been struck by a meteor. If there were a God in this universe, there would be a meteor.
Re:Slippery slope on "public performance" (Score:0, Funny)
I don't mean to be ridiculous but ... (Score:5, Funny)
Pick you battles (Score:5, Funny)
They're Absolutely Right! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:RIAA (Score:5, Funny)
Some of us use our phones for - can you believe it - communication
But at some point you probably sung Happy Birthday to your child over the phone. As an unauthorized public performance that allows the RIAA to sell your children into slavery. This is all covered by the brief filed in their case "RIAA vs. All of Humanity".
Re:RIAA (Score:5, Funny)
My phone has 5 megapixel camera, opera mini as browser and full Java support. And it's not a high end phone. ... SSH to my computer ...
My phone has none of that. Stupid cheap plastic junk. It does, however, have dozens of probably infringing ringtones. My favorite is a redub of Aerosmith's "Eat the Rich" that goes "Fuck the RIAA". The meter doesn't quite scan, but the point gets across.
ASSCAP demands payment when your phone rings (Score:3, Funny)
(to be posted on NotN [today.com] tomorrow, probably)
The American Super-Society of Composers and Performers has filed a brief in a lawsuit against AT&T arguing that its members deserve payment every time a mobile phone rings.
The owners of the musical compositions are already paid for each ringtone download, but this does not cover ASSCAP public performance royalties.
"The musicians and songwriters are the true creators of objective value in society," said ASSCAP spokesdroid Ayn Rand. "They deserve your support. How would civilisation survive without Crazy Frog or the Nokia Tune?
"To this end, we are bringing suits against those individuals who, having purchased RIAA-licensed ringtones, do not then silence them when in public. Statutory damages of $80,000 should have a salutary effect on our coffers and, of course, our public image."
Further lawsuits will then be brought against those who silence their mobile phones. "4'33' by John Cage is a copyrighted work. Without the money going to his estate, he may never write another measured piece of silence again."
Re:RIAA (Score:2, Funny)
Geez, I should stop whistling popular tunes to myself while in public areas. Bad, bad habit! Some RIAA or ASCAP jerk may overhear me and sell me into slavery to the Third World. On the other hand, there I'll be allowed to whistle at least!
Re:Copyright law... (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Someone... (Score:5, Funny)
Another word for "composer" is "handicrafter." Another word for "publisher" is "typesetter." So ASCAP should change their name from "American Society of Composers, Authors and Publishers" to "American Society of Skilled Handicrafting, Authoring and Typesetting Specialists."
Short form: ASSHATS.
Re:Someone... (Score:5, Funny)
come on... it's
"Tea, Earl Grey, Hot"
Re:RIAA (Score:3, Funny)
hey, if you're going to do that, at least quote the obligatory xkcd
http://xkcd.com/479/ [xkcd.com]
EVEN WORSE! (Score:1, Funny)
ASPCA Wants To Be Paid When Your Dog Rings.
Re:Pick you battles (Score:1, Funny)
Hopefully only if you have a Guess Who ringtone. That would only be fair.
Re: Constitutional Foundation... (Score:3, Funny)
Yeah, that process is called "Amendment".
Remember, The Constitution grants the Federal Government its legitimate authority. If it's not delegated, it's not legitimate.
They thought good and hard when they wrote: "to Promote the progress of Science and the useful Arts".
No Doubt's "Bathwater" doesn't meet that criteria. I might entertain arguments for "Hella Good", but it's still gonna be a uphill climb.
Re:What about radios, etc? (Score:2, Funny)
Please stop with the outlandish displays of ignorance.
Ewe muss bee gnu hear.
Re:Someone... (Score:5, Funny)
That line is the property of Paramount Pictures. Please remit settlement payment of $5,000, or hire legal representation.
Performance (Score:3, Funny)
If ASCAP really believes that ringtones constitute a performance, then surely they won't mind standing between any decent rock band and their fans when the band comes out and only performs 16 bars of all their hit songs.
So that would be....? (Score:3, Funny)
For the joy your friggin' phone is bringing to those around you when it goes off? ASCAP should be forced to set aside a fund to pay _US_.
Re:One cannot help but wonder . . . (Score:2, Funny)
That might fall under cluster munitions, though. Oh, they're still legal in the US. You're in with a chance, but you'd better get that meteorite swarm in quick.
Re:Someone... (Score:5, Funny)
I hope they get what they wanted (Score:2, Funny)
I really hope they get their measure passed. Any incentive for people to abuse my ear less with this idiotic invention of "ringtone" is very welcome by me.
Re:Someone... (Score:1, Funny)
Still, they won't be happy when they realize that the "spider" drawing bears an uncanny resemblance to a hand giving them the finger.
Re:Someone... (Score:1, Funny)
I would say that drawing is at least worth $6000. Please send this fine artist change!
Re:Someone... (Score:3, Funny)
Excellent. Don't forget to check if they scan/copy the image, as you may be entitled to $50 mil in statutory damages.