Highly-Paid Developers As ScrumMasters? 434
An anonymous reader writes 'At my company, our mis-implementation of Agile includes the employment of some of our most highly-paid, principal engineers as ScrumMasters. This has effectively resulted in a loss of those engineering functions as these engineers now dedicate their time to ScrumMastery. Furthermore, the ScrumMasters either cannot or do not separate their roles as Team Leads with those of ScrumMastery and — worse — seem to be completely unaware that this poor implementation of Agile development is harmful to our velocity. To date, I have chalked this up to poor leadership, a general lack of understanding of Agile, and an inability to change from traditional roles left over from the waterfall development mode. In addition, I have contended that, for a given Scrum Team, the role of ScrumMaster should be filled by someone of lower impact, such as an intern brought in specifically for that purpose. But I would like to put the questions to Slashdotters as to whether they have seen these same transitional difficulties, what the results have been at their respective companies, or whether they just plain disagree with my assertion that principal engineers should not be relegated to the roles of ScrumMasters.'
Try before you buy? (Score:5, Funny)
I wish I could try this scrum in a safe environment, I need some sort of ScrumVM.
"Our mis-implementation of Agile includes.." (Score:5, Funny)
"Our mis-implementation of Agile includes.." ..is a pretty good idea for a ThinkGeek t-shirt.
scrum, isn't that a rugby term? (Score:2, Funny)
For all the players putting their arms around eachother and kicking everyone else in the shins. At least that sounds like what the poster was talking about.
Yikes (Score:3, Funny)
"...seem to be completely unaware that this poor implementation of Agile development is harmful to our velocity"
Oh, for fucks sake...
I'll say this once:
Chop the little pointy horns of hair growing out of the side of your head, and get the fuck back to writing code, you stupid monkey.
!rugby (Score:5, Funny)
What the hell? (Score:4, Funny)
Re:"Our mis-implementation of Agile includes.." (Score:3, Funny)
"... Lotus Notes and a machine gun. It is the finest available."
Sorry, I just couldn't help myself.
Re:WTF does this mean??? (Score:5, Funny)
Could we please get some explanatory links in here?
While this is not my area of expertise, I think I can explain. His team leaders/scrotum masters are poor leaders. They don't seem to understand flexibility. He on the other hand, he thinks he understands flexibility. And he wants an intern to be the scrotum master.
The only part that I find confusing is that interns are usually the slaves, not the masters. Somehow, this guy thinks that a new slave can suddenly become a master just like that. That, I don't think so. So I'm either misunderstanding something, or this guy is missing the bigger picture. The issue that the team lead is overburdened is probably a very real problem, that I don't doubt. But it seems to me, this anonymous poster would just be trading one problem for another. An intern doesn't have the experience. An intern doesn't have the authority. One might as very well leave the scrotum alone if there is no one there that can handle it.
Re:Yes, use experts as scrum masters (Score:4, Funny)
Well done, you've just managed to be even more confusing than the original article.
Re:WTF does this mean??? (Score:3, Funny)
Could we please get some explanatory links in here?
Slashdot has been trolled.
In fact, the whole article is written in gay BSDM porn jargon and has nothing to do with computers or programming.
If you want to know what a ScrumMaster is: imagine a half-naked fat hairy guy in black leather with studs. I don't want to go into the details on "interns", "Agile", "principal engineers" and worst of all "waterfall development mode". Really, goatse is like a meadow of beautiful flowers compared to this.
Re:why use scrum in the first place (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Clearly a targetted post: (Score:3, Funny)
Bingo, sir. [dilbert.com]
Re:WTF does this mean??? (Score:2, Funny)
question... (Score:3, Funny)
Did it impact your speed or direction?
Re:WTF does this mean??? (Score:3, Funny)
It basically sounds like Scientology developed its own coding methodology. He was trying to do a sprint to burndown some backlog, but he got stuck in a process and got enturbulated, so he had to get the ScrumMaster to audit his code for engrams so he can make some big wins and move up the bridge. The best part is that under this system, you pay your boss to write code for him...
Re:Hurl (Score:5, Funny)
I can see it now. Several years from now, a developer who has been working, doing heads down coding, doing his job, and getting the projects finished, goes for an interview...
"Have you any experience being a ScrumMaster"
"A what?"
"A ScrumMaster"
"I'm sorry, I don't play those online fantasy games"
"No, that's not what I mean"
"Oh...well, I don't play rugby either."
Re:DTFT! (Define That Fucking Term!) (Score:1, Funny)