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Microsoft The Media Windows News

Mainstream Press "Cringes" At Win7 Launch Parties 830

lurking_giant writes "Well, Microsoft has done it again with the YouTube Windows 7 launch party video that is turning the stomachs of even the mainstream press with its clueless and campy marketing style. A Washington Post reader was quoted as saying 'If Microsoft had been put in charge of marketing sex, the human race would have ended long ago, because no one would be caught dead doing something that uncool.'" Even the Guardian's resident die-hard Apple hater calls it "the most nauseating advert in history."
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Mainstream Press "Cringes" At Win7 Launch Parties

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  • by Anonymous Coward on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:24PM (#29573737)

    I see everyone else is catatonic from watching the video.

    • by Anonymous Coward on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:45PM (#29574001)

      After watching the clock on the oven behind them lurch around between 3:00 and 5:00 I have an awful headache, and my eyes and ears are starting to bleed. I think I need to find a constant.

      • by Runaway1956 ( 1322357 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @08:57PM (#29574821) Homepage Journal

        HA HA!!!! Yes, the video sucked, but I found cool links!! And, I got a new sig!!!

        I LOVE this story!

      • by EdIII ( 1114411 ) * on Tuesday September 29, 2009 @12:27AM (#29576393)

        After watching the clock on the oven behind them lurch around between 3:00 and 5:00 I have an awful headache, and my eyes and ears are starting to bleed. I think I need to find a constant.

        There is a simple explanation. While you are watching the video time ceases to have any meaning. The laws of physics and nature are rent asunder and you are thrown into a reality in which only you and that video exists.

        What you may, or may not, realize... is that the clock is different for every person. It represents an unconscious awareness of something very wrong.

        Be happy you have seen the clock. Sadly, some people don't even see it and don't even realize what has happened to them. Like many poor victims they have been traumatically wrenched from this reality and cannot understand, will not understand, what has happened to them. Shoved violently across existence into a sea of un-time they will experience this state of agony forever.

        A work of evil worthy of the old gods it is.

        • by cerberusss ( 660701 ) on Tuesday September 29, 2009 @02:50AM (#29577183) Journal

          A work of evil worthy of the old gods it is.

          They are among us and they are on the internet.

          Let me tell you a story.

          Stacy Griffith, 15, liked frequenting chat rooms online. One day, she met a funny, goofy boy who was deep and intelligent. They talked all the time and eventually, they decided they were going to meet up at a mall in Stacy's home town.

          Only when they met, Stacy realized he was no boy.

          It was motherfucking Cthulhu. Holy fucking shit.

          5,000 Americal girls lose their sanity to Cthulhu each year. Stop online predatation from Great Old Ones before it can start. Educate your children about Cthulhu today.

          (Seen on Wil Wheaton's blog [typepad.com].)

    • by socceroos ( 1374367 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @08:02PM (#29574201)
      Yep. I'm at a loss for words.

      But seriously, what are Microsoft getting at? This is looking more and more like a cult thing than ever. Inviting friends over to preach to them about the virtues of Windows 7 so the unrepentant soul might offer sacrifices and money to the Microsoft god? I found the advert really eerie and unsettling...

      I couldn't get the word 'scientology' out of my head when watching this... The church of Microsoftology - has a nice ring to it. Doctrines include Windowsology (overarching doctrine which includes many sub-doctrines and principals including DOSomatics, BSODology and Restartology) amongst many others.

      Its Ballmerific!
      • Re:First post... (Score:5, Insightful)

        by Darkness404 ( 1287218 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @08:09PM (#29574313)
        I think its more Microsoft attempting to be similar to Apple. But the problem is they are failing because PCs are just too common. Its not a "choice" to use MS software, its just there by default. And its a pain for the average user. Either they spend a lot of $$$ getting an easy to use Mac or save money and get a PC with problems. Thats just how the average person sees things.
        • Re:First post... (Score:4, Insightful)

          by postbigbang ( 761081 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @08:25PM (#29574505)

          This is a company that's trying to get back the fanfare that they lost after dragging out XP in three service packs, then a real loser with Vista, and misses those lines at Best Buys. Community support makes Windows 7 a kind of empty event. We wanted Vista to be cool, but it was a slap in the face. Trying to buy back user fanboyness isn't easy to do, and this one looks like a backlash attempt.

          If you make good stuff, they'll come and love you. Viz others currently enjoying heaps of (oft undeserved) fanboy love.

        • by flyingfsck ( 986395 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @09:01PM (#29574865)
          I think someone with a webcam on an Ubuntu netbook made that 'advertisement' to spite M$...
          • by tehcyder ( 746570 ) on Tuesday September 29, 2009 @07:43AM (#29578461) Journal

            I think someone with a webcam on an Ubuntu netbook made that 'advertisement' to spite M$...

            But everyone knows that only Windows XP runs a netbook properly, there's no way you'd get Ubuntu to work a webcam unless it was at 2fps, in grainy black and white and with no sound.

      • Re:First post... (Score:5, Interesting)

        by Chabil Ha' ( 875116 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @08:12PM (#29574345)

        I'm actually hosting one of these, but we're also going to be doing comparison demos of Ubuntu and Snow Leopard. In addition to the Windows 7 junk that comes in the party kit (including a free copy of Windows 7 Ultimate), I will be giving out LiveCDs and and discs of free software.

        I think Windows 7 is a marked improvement over XP (I have been using it fulltime since the beta), but friends help friends find what's best for their situation. I have die hard Windows/Mac/Linux friends, so doing it this way is a chance for everyone to explore something new--even if I have to make an excuse like a Windows 7 party to do it.

      • Re:First post... (Score:5, Insightful)

        by Intron ( 870560 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @09:21PM (#29575043)

        I couldn't get the word 'scientology' out of my head when watching this

        I was thinking "Amway"

    • Re:First post... (Score:5, Insightful)

      by TW Burger ( 646637 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @08:02PM (#29574207)

      Uuuuuuuuuuuhuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhh... drool, pass out. No wonder adding comments has been disabled for the video. This reminds me of anti-smoking ads that are so lame and stupid (usually directed at teens) that they make you want to smoke.

    • by holloway ( 46404 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @08:13PM (#29574363) Homepage
    • Re: (Score:3, Interesting)

      by Gerzel ( 240421 ) *

      Is it just me or is it incredably ironic that the video is streamed from YouTube which is owned by Google. Shouldn't they have their Bing or equivalent knock-off by now?

  • Funny. (Score:5, Funny)

    by Anonymatt ( 1272506 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:25PM (#29573745)

    Come on, this video is complex, challenging art.

  • by ihatewinXP ( 638000 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:26PM (#29573759)

    Have Leo Laporte and the TWiT's had their Windows 7 party yet?

    He said that they were signing up (2 weeks ago?) and would receive among other things: Windows 7 themed balloons, napkins and cups.

    Wow, Microsoft.... Just, wow...

    • Re: (Score:3, Insightful)

      Wow, Microsoft.... Just, wow...

      It got attention. Isn't that the point of marketing?

      And I dare say MS wasn't expecting to convert slashdot posters with usernames like "ihatewinXP" to using Windows 7 with these ads... :)

      • by pohl ( 872 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:36PM (#29573893) Homepage

        A shooting spree at the local mall gets media attention too, but I wouldn't want it associated with my brand.

      • by _Sprocket_ ( 42527 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @08:13PM (#29574355)

        It got attention. Isn't that the point of marketing?

        Not entirely. Take the Taco Bell Dog as an example. From Snopes [snopes.com]:

        In July 2000 fast food giant Taco Bell (a subsidiary of Yum! Brands, Inc.) did the ostensibly unthinkable: it abruptly ended what appeared to be a highly successful ad campaign that had worked to establish this memorable brand identity. Seemingly out of the blue, the corporation announced it would no longer feature the wise-cracking Chihuahua in its ads. Though the Taco Bell dog might make cameo appearances in subsequent commercials, he was being retired as company spokespooch.

        The reason behind the move was simple enough: the dog, though beloved of consumers, wasn't working magic on the company's bottom line. Though Taco Bell had succeeded in creating a cultural icon, the resultant symbol wasn't inspiring a great enough segment of the fast food-buying public to make a run for the border. Same-store sales were down 6 percent in the second quarter of 2000, a result the company could only regard as alarming and a certain sign that changes had to be made.

        So while Microsoft's marketing may bring smiles to churro [seattlest.com] vendors everywhere, it doesn't mean the attention is really getting anything for Microsoft.

      • by dangitman ( 862676 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @09:28PM (#29575093)

        It got attention. Isn't that the point of marketing? And I dare say MS wasn't expecting to convert slashdot posters with usernames like "ihatewinXP" to using Windows 7 with these ads... :)

        Selling more product, or raising your brand's identity is the point of marketing. This does the opposite. The point of this story is that it's not just slashdot folk who are hearing about this - it's all over the mainstream media. The problem (for Microsoft) is that the Windows 7 launch is supposed to remove the negative associations that Vista caused people to have. For a while, the "buzz on the street" was that Windows 7 is actually a decent OS, unlike Vista. But as soon as the average person sees this House Party video, they are going to be very suspicious that Windows 7 is nothing but marketing hype, and may not actually be a decent OS after all. That's very bad for Microsoft, especially after the success they've had in viral marketing of Windows 7 so far.

    • Fools (Score:5, Funny)

      by Greyfox ( 87712 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @08:06PM (#29574259) Homepage Journal
      They're in need of some serious help here. Ok Microsoft, I feel so bad for your social ineptitude that this one's for free.

      Windows 7 themed jello shots, strippers and potato cannons.

      You can thank me later.

  • by cjfs ( 1253208 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:27PM (#29573771) Homepage Journal

    Most advertisements only evoke one or two emotions. This one manages to make me feel despair, disgust, fear, and rage, all at the same time.

    They've truly taken it to the next level.

    • by QuantumG ( 50515 ) * <qg@biodome.org> on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:29PM (#29573795) Homepage Journal

      wait until you try the OS.

      • by cjfs ( 1253208 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:31PM (#29573831) Homepage Journal

        wait until you try the OS.

        I've been using it for several months, it's definitely not as bad as their marketing.

        • Re: (Score:3, Interesting)

          by node 3 ( 115640 )

          wait until you try the OS.

          I've been using it for several months, it's definitely not as bad as their marketing.

          I remember hearing this about Vista, pre-launch as well.

          The only real difference here is that Windows 7 has Vista to compare against, which can only make it look good. Additionally, new PCs will really require Windows Vista/7 to take full advantage of the hardware (or, perhaps XP64, which is too problematic to be mainstream). I'd wager, though, that hardware consideration aside, average consumers would rather run XP than Windows 7.

    • by kallisti777 ( 46059 ) <TimWalker@@@gmail...com> on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:58PM (#29574161) Homepage Journal

      Read the Guardian article [guardian.co.uk]. What you're feeling is called "shitasmia".

    • Re: (Score:3, Interesting)

      This one manages to make me feel despair, disgust, fear, and rage, all at the same time.

      ...and yet, there's something like a 90% chance that you will buy their product (just a guess based on the current usage share of windows, not necessarily a /. reader). Does it matter that it's a horrible marketing attempt if the goal of the company is still accomplished?

      • by node 3 ( 115640 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @08:50PM (#29574757)

        ...and yet, there's something like a 90% chance that you will buy their product

        Far fewer than 90% of people actually ever buy a Windows product. They may buy a PC (still, nowhere near 90%, but I'm not going to quibble here), but they generally *aren't* particularly set on Windows specifically.

        Does it matter that it's a horrible marketing attempt if the goal of the company is still accomplished?

        MS's goal isn't met, hence the ads. They want everyone to run out and buy Windows 7. This won't happen. They want PC makers to not sell Linux. This won't happen. They want Apple to fail. This won't happen. Calling 90% (or whatever) to be MS's goal is like running with football, then drawing an end zone around the spot where you were tackled.

  • Ratings disabled? (Score:5, Informative)

    by SanityInAnarchy ( 655584 ) <ninja@slaphack.com> on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:28PM (#29573789) Journal

    I wonder why...

  • by BeaverAndrew ( 1645577 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:28PM (#29573793)
    White Guy: "Of course the first thing you're going to do is install Windows 7." Group: *Laughs* (Like we're going to do that.)
    • Re: (Score:3, Funny)

      by pintpusher ( 854001 )

      Black Guy: "Can you believe Microsoft put the launch of windows 7 in our hands?!"
      Group: *laughs*
      Black Guy: "Are they nuts or what?!"
      Group: *laughs*
      White Guy: "(maybe|only)*** by letting you be involved!"
      Group: "ooh harsh!"

      If only they had followed up with

      Black Guy: *pounds White Guy for being a jerk*
      White Guy: *screams like a girl while blood gushes from his nose*
      Women: *laughs*

      it would have avoided

      Me: *pukes*

      ***unintelligible

  • by bughunter ( 10093 ) <(bughunter) (at) (earthlink.net)> on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:29PM (#29573803) Journal

    I like how they disabled comments on the video.

    Because, of course, the video's obvious coolness needed no acknowledgment from the viewers.

  • NPR weighed in (Score:4, Informative)

    by Peter Simpson ( 112887 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:29PM (#29573805)

    Heard it on All Things Considered on the way home tonight. They played a clip from the "how to give a party" video. There were several comments about how MS's marketing dept had missed the target again.

  • by eldavojohn ( 898314 ) * <eldavojohn@noSpAM.gmail.com> on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:29PM (#29573807) Journal
    I remember for the Heinz Ketchup creativity contest they had recently there were a bunch of videos they kept removing despite them getting a lot of votes. Like this one that showed a wicked old lady chugging ketchup and then at the end she holds the bottle up and smiles and has this awesome snaggletooth grin with missing teeth.

    So Microsoft will have to put with questionable content and I'll be there to vote it up and love it. Example:

    *man sits behind TV set with only shoulders and head visible and upper arm working vigorously while expressions of joy cross his face*
    Narrator: So there I was watching some kitten snuff films before my friends arrived for the Win7 Launch party.
    *doorbell rings, narrator gets up to open door behind which are three guys with sunglasses on and a white powder visibly smeared across their upper lips*
    Narrator: Guys, what's the deal, where are the hookers?
    Christian Slater Sounding Partier: Yeah, Fred, about that, we had a little accident. One of the hookers got a bit lippy and they're not gonna make it.
    Narrator: They're coming later?
    Christian Slater Sounding Partier: Just make sure you don't leave any fingerprints on your dumpster if you go there tonight.
    Narrator: Awesome, well, you all brought your stolen laptops so let's fire 'em up and start doing something better than snorting coke and killing hookers: installing Win7.

    Remember, it's not just the comments that are impressively stupid on YouTube. There's also videos. Opening up your company to a video contest? Yeah, I'll be searching YouTube for "Win7 Launch Party REJECTED."
  • by Anonymous Coward on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:29PM (#29573811)

    ...are not generating any free press for Microsoft.

  • by A Wise Guy ( 1006169 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:30PM (#29573817)
    I have seriously thrown up and lost 10 pounds of food from my intestines including water. You too can achieve rapid weight loss.
    • Re: (Score:3, Interesting)

      by Adammil2000 ( 797026 )
      The Windows 1.0 video was intentionally a joke video made for the annual company meeting shown to employees.
    • Re: (Score:3, Funny)

      by Just Some Guy ( 3352 )

      "Except in Nebraska!"

      Crap. I wish they'd saved that restriction until now so I could avoid this latest iteration.

  • by Jahava ( 946858 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:30PM (#29573827)
    T=5:43: Can you believe that Microsoft put the launch of Windows 7 in our hands? Couldn't have said it better myself. I love the token nerd, attractive woman, old-but-hip person, and black guy. It's like they hired marketing undergraduates to design the video.
  • by mikeiver1 ( 1630021 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:34PM (#29573863)
    I could not get through even 30 seconds of it and I am in shame for that. I would rather light my ball hairs on fire and have a bondage trans sexual primordial dwarf beat the fire out with a sledge hammer than have to watch another second of that bowel evacuating drivel! The camera work sucks too. Mike
    • Re: (Score:3, Insightful)

      by Jeff DeMaagd ( 2015 )

      I was about 10 seconds, and this was without audio. The camera work is that of a douche, the camera is always panning at least a little bit, and there were too many stupid snap zooms. I realize this has become popular lately, but I start feeling like I'm getting tipsy.

      The whole concept is deranged, if you're putting on a party, don't do it for marketing someone else's product. Heck, any kind of product party is deranged, it says to the invitees that you're so bored, you'll attend a thinly veiled product

  • by Freaky Spook ( 811861 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:36PM (#29573897)

    It wasn't until I was 1/2 way through the video where it dawned on me that they were discussing throwing a party to introduce their friends to all the cool new things that Windows 7 can offer.

    Either Microsoft is planning on selling Windows 7 like tuppaware or what I just watched was the introduction to a very bad porno.

  • by redmid17 ( 1217076 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:38PM (#29573911)
    They think they're on solid ground to criticize the marketing of a company that actually made money last year? Let me know the the newspapers entice their readership back to levels that are slightly above the number of people who'll read my post.
  • by syntap ( 242090 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:39PM (#29573919)

    I wonder why, they were ashamed of it as soon as they posted it.

    I actually watched the whole thing... you guys didn't, so you didn't see the older lady and the oldest lady erupt into passionate lesbian sex. The dudes pulled out weapons and began close-quarters combat. The video ended with the Mac guy emerging from stage right and saying "pwn3d".

  • S3x (Score:5, Funny)

    by Tablizer ( 95088 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:41PM (#29573953) Journal

    ...quoted as saying 'If Microsoft had been put in charge of marketing sex, the human race would have ended long ago

    Blue-Balls of Death, eh?
       

  • by flibuste ( 523578 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:42PM (#29573969)

    This thing is so vomit-inducing that everyone is talking about it and many who would not have watched the video actually did. As a case of viral marketing, I'd say it is brilliant. Few viruses can make you puke just by looking at them.

  • by MisterFuRR ( 311169 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:54PM (#29574119) Journal

    Wow...it took them over 3hrs to film that short 6 minute PSA. Not only was it horrible, but the actors involved didn't even believe what they were pitching.

  • Ah Microsoft. (Score:4, Insightful)

    by tthomas48 ( 180798 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @07:59PM (#29574167)

    They really should have let the product market itself. Because for once they have a halfway decent product. Remember when they said Vista was as good as OSX? And then we used Vista and perhaps we should have treated their marketing campaign like a child with mental deficiencies? Like it's not polite to laugh at them, because they are trying...

    But Windows 7 is actually the product Vista was supposed to be. But they're trying to sell it as something new. The only way that Microsoft could market this is, "Yeah, Windows Vista sucks ass. The UI didn't make sense, and it was often slow for no apparent reason. We'll acknowledge that now that we have a replacement. We know that almost every computer shipped with Vista has been converted to Windows XP. Here's the produce that fixes all those problems."

    The only way to regain consumer trust is to admit your faults. Or just say nothing and let consumers do your advertising for you. I can already see the tweets - "Windows 7 not a steaming pile of dogshit!". That's the kind of grassroots movement that sells software.

    • Re:Ah Microsoft. (Score:5, Interesting)

      by registrar ( 1220876 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @09:50PM (#29575321)

      Not even. Essentially what they are doing is kickstarting a quality viral campaign. Snigger all you want at the ad, that's what they want you do do. They produce ads that are so embarrassing that the message is really clear: "oh, did you see the lame ad, these guys should stick to doing what they do best, which is programming. Win 7 is actually quite good you know."

      The implied contrast is: "Apple is all about good marketing."

      Let's face it: we geeks all do the same thing. When you show up with your dirty beard, beer gut, suspenders, blackened coffee mug, you are telling the world "everyone values my competence so much that I don't need to sell myself via superficial means."

      Same with Zunes and squirting and all that.

  • by Twillerror ( 536681 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @08:06PM (#29574263) Homepage Journal

    The start me up campaign was pretty good if I remember.

    Get AC/DC or something. Something Thunderstruck or Back in Black.

    Then go hire a music video guy to do some funky video where everyone's face turns into a window.

    Why is this so hard?

  • by popo ( 107611 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @08:10PM (#29574317) Homepage

    ... if the creative decision-making behind the actual software is as utterly lost and out-of-touch as this video ...

    well... start the countdown: implosion in 10,9,8,7...

    this is easily the worst promotion I have ever seen. Microsoft, please for the love of god fire your ad agency. There is 'incompetent', and then there's this extra-special, groundbreaking new plateau of retarded-ness.

    I didn't think it was possible to kill Windows 7 with a single video -- BUT IT JUST HAPPENED.

  • by speedtux ( 1307149 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @08:12PM (#29574335)

    The video is perfect. The video correctly represent Windows 7 and its design philosophy. And it evokes the same feelings in me that using Windows does.

    Congratulations!

  • by Smartcowboy ( 679871 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @08:14PM (#29574377)
  • by Fusione ( 980444 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @08:16PM (#29574407)
    It's so terrible, I feel compelled to send it to everyone I know so they can see its glory. Well played, Microsoft.. Well played. -_-
  • by blhack ( 921171 ) on Monday September 28, 2009 @08:57PM (#29574827)

    It's viral marketing. They know that nobody is going to have one of these idiotic "launch parties".

    They've intentionally made the worst ad they could (while still making it somehow realistic enough for people to buy it) in order to get people to talk about windows 7.

    I did not know when the launch-date for this was. This ad has been posted on all of the major tech-news blogs. Now I do. Mission accomplished.

  • by merc ( 115854 ) <slashdot@upt.org> on Monday September 28, 2009 @10:54PM (#29575849) Homepage

    Apologies in advance to David Letterman:

    * Pin the tail on the Ballmer

    * Simon says "UAC needs your permission to continue"

    * Monopoly

    * Your files in a haystack

    * Twenty clippy questions

    * Musical thrown chairs

    * Darl McBride pinata

    * Red Light, Green Light, Blue Screen

    * DRM may I?

    * Phone Home Scruples

  • by Fantastic Lad ( 198284 ) on Tuesday September 29, 2009 @01:09AM (#29576621)

    People are asking, "How could Microsoft, with all its wealth and power, produce such a stupid series of ads?"

    Because they're smarter than you?

    --Because they have enough wealth and power to hire one of the smartest public relations firms on the planet. Waggener Edstrom is the same firm in charge of the Fox Channels. If there's any one thing they know how to do, it's identify a market and then lock down that market forever and ever and sell them whatever the hell 'truth' they feel like selling.

    Here's a small clip from a page [zdnet.com] I found after about 10 seconds of Google searching. . .

    "Microsoft's primary public-relations firm, Waggener Edstrom.

    Like many tech PR firms, WaggEd also monitors religiously Twitter trends involving its biggest client. On March 11, WaggEd went beyond simply monitoring tweets: It introduced a beta version of a software tool for monitoring and analyzing them.

    Do they sound stupid now?

    My guess is that they're doing three things with this ad. . .

    1. They're trying to tap into a universal feeling of awkwardness that everybody feels when recalling a "PCP" party. (Parents, Chips and Pop). They're doing this because awkward, painful feelings open up memory centers. Information given during a period of high anxiety gets locked into place in the human mind. This is a well-known and often-used ploy in mind control. The information being served up in these ads is NOT how to run your software or all the features offered by their OS, but that "WINDOWS 7 EXISTS AND IT IS UBIQUITOUS AND YOU, AS A PACK ANIMAL HAD BETTER GET WITH THE PROGRAM OR RISK EXPULSION FROM THE HERD!!!!"

    2. Trying to tap into the feeling of safety and love which people also feel when they think of their parents and the silly birthday parties thrown for them when they were little. Why? Because an OS is the bedrock upon which you ground your entire computer existence, --the same way your parents provided the bedrock for your adult behavior sets. You might think your parents were stupid and annoying, and you probably want to deny it, but the truth of the matter is that most people grow up to become their parents.

    3. Go viral. --Using such deliberate tactics designed to rope in the lower echelon of geeks, such as stove clocks which are obviously bouncing around 'wrong' in exactly the kind of way geeks like to point out and be "Right" about. Fuck, fuck, FUCK! There's a whole sick cultural system through which people who like computer technology were warped into that "Look! I'm RIGHT!" head-space, and you had better believe that clock "error" was on purpose so as to lock them in. Low-hanging fruit.

    So, please, for goodness sake, try to think outside of the bloody box when approaching the toxic waste which is advertising! If you fall for this kind of stupid shit, then you're nothing but slaves who deserve to be used and abused, and you WILL be.

    Sorry for the harsh language, but this is important.

    -FL

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