Microsoft Applies For Page-Turn Animation Patent 293
eldavojohn writes "Ever seeking to out innovate their competition, Microsoft has applied for a patent on animating page flips in devices like the Nook or Kindle. The application summary reads, 'One or more pages are displayed on a touch display. A page-turning gesture directed to a displayed page is recognized. Responsive to such recognition, a virtual page turn is displayed on the touch display. The virtual page turn actively follows the page-turning gesture. The virtual page turn curls a lifted portion of the page to progressively reveal a back side of the page while progressively revealing a front side of a subsequent page. A lifted portion of the page is given an increased transparency that allows the back side of the page to be viewed through the front side of the page. A page-flipping gesture quickly flips two or more pages.' Maybe you've seen this before?"
Hurry up and someone patent.... (Score:5, Funny)
.... reading.....
Next Patent... (Score:5, Funny)
Microsoft Fast Page Flip Lick Moistener (TM). It's for when you moisten your index or other page-flipping finger on your tongue to flip faster.
Software patents suck ass (Score:5, Funny)
I'd flip Microsoft a gesture but they've probably patented that too.
Re:Hurry up and someone patent.... (Score:3, Funny)
Hey, what does this Slashdot comment say? Can anyone help me determine this?
Maybe if I throw in a licensing fee?
Re:Maybe you should ask the right question: (Score:3, Funny)
Re:I claim prior art (Score:3, Funny)
I used that in a short story I wrote that was published in the 80s and it's on record both in the US and Canadian copyright systems.
MSFT can't patent what I already described in a public magazine.
Dude, my Canadian girlfriend, who is totally real, remembers reading that story in the 80s. I asked her about it while I was totally boning her and she remembered it because both her and it are totally real. Next time she visits, I'll totally ask her what it was in!
Re:Hurry up and someone patent.... (Score:5, Funny)
To hell with reading. I'm going to see if I can patent ball scratching. Think about it - half the people in the world scratch their balls, even before they come out of the womb. Reading is just for the elite, who have had time, money, and coddling enough to learn to read. Scratching balls? I can sue people for patent infringement even before they are born! I'll be richer than Microsoft, Apple, Government Motors, and the United States Government combined!
Oh, for anyone who wonders - we have video from a sonogram that distinctly shows the kid scratching at his groin at around 7 months gestation. It's time we dragged that out and showed it to everyone again. LMAO
Re:Hurry up and someone patent.... (Score:3, Funny)
You're too late, I already applied for the more generic "Method for applying manual repetitive friction generation as genital stimulus".
Re:Hurry up and someone patent.... (Score:2, Funny)
I'll be richer than Microsoft, Apple, Government Motors, and the United States Government combined!
Doesn't the United States Government pretty much cancel out the other three?
Re:Hurry up and someone patent.... (Score:2, Funny)
patent cock stroking, then you get half the population PLUS the straight girls and hookers!
'One or more cocks are displayed on a touch display. A cock-stroking gesture directed to a displayed cock is recognized. Responsive to such recognition, a virtual cock stroke is displayed on the touch display. The virtual cock stroke actively follows the cock-stroking gesture. The virtual foreskin turn curls a lifted portion of the skin to progressively reveal the back side of the foreskin while progressively revealing the tip of the cock. A lifted portion of the foreskin is given an increased transparency that allows the back side of the foreskin to be viewed through the front side of the foreskin. A multi-stroking gesture quickly stokes two or more cocks.'
There you have it.