Intelligence Officials Fear Snowden's 'Doomsday' Cache 381
Dega704 writes with news that Edward Snowden is believed to have a collection of highly sensitive classified documents that will be released in the event he is detained, hurt, or killed. According to Reuters, "The data is protected with sophisticated encryption, and multiple passwords are needed to open it, said two of the sources, who like the others spoke on condition of anonymity to discuss intelligence matters. The passwords are in the possession of at least three different people and are valid for only a brief time window each day, they said. The identities of persons who might have the passwords are unknown." These details have caused several security experts to express skepticism, but multiple sources, including Glenn Greenwald, believe Snowden has not released all of the documents he appropriated. "U.S. officials and other sources said only a small proportion of the classified material Snowden downloaded during stints as a contract systems administrator for NSA has been made public. Some Obama Administration officials have said privately that Snowden downloaded enough material to fuel two more years of news stories." Whether or not it's true, U.S. and U.K. officials clearly believe it, which can only serve to protect Snowden.
Lovely (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Security is a tricky thing (Score:5, Funny)
Re:The real news (Score:4, Funny)
Kennedy killed by Sturgis and Hunt in Poppy-managed operation.
Re:Brief time window? (Score:2, Funny)
#!/bin/bash
nc -lp 31337 | while read key /tmp/massive.info | openssl aes256cbc -k "$key" -iv ~/iv.data -d | pastebin -t "Snowden's Docs"
do
if [ `date` 9am -or 9pm `date` ]
then
echo "skipping key read because the world is sleeping and no one would notice a massive release of information at this time..."
else
if [ "$key" == "zomgztheygotme!" ]
then
cat
fi
fi
done
- stoops!
This Holiday Season on RT! (Score:5, Funny)
Join us in our traditional gathering around the samovar, for a Christmas presentation of what's surely to become an RT classic:
"Snowed In with Snowden". Edward Snowden invites various RT holiday gusts, for the cheer of the season, in the shadow of St. Basil's. The laughs begin, as Max Kaiser drops by with a little flask of "holiday cheer" - and some very special "snow" of his own. Then, we solemnize with George Galloway and Ken Livingston, who join Ed for a haunting rendition (did we just use that word?) of "Rudolph, The Red Nosed Reindeer". But hang tight on the presents! Orthodox Chrismas in't til January, innit?
Well, happy Feast of Epiphany, in any matter. Stay tuned!
Re:Torn (Score:4, Funny)
Re:The real news (Score:5, Funny)
Kennedy killed
Kennedy shot himself.
And Snowden has the documents to prove it!
But Jackie immediately jumped out of the car with Kennedy's DNA on her dress, so she could be quickly transported to Area 51, where Wernher von Braun (Eva's brother) was filming the trips to the moon with Stanley Kubrick, and other Operation Paperclip scientists, who combined JFK's DNA with Martin Luther King's DNA to create Barack Obama, so he really is American, even though he doesn't have a birth certificate, because both his fathers were American (Chew on that, Fox News!), and Stanley Kubrick was so impressed with what was going on in the German test tubes, that he filmed Obama's birth and used it in 2001 for that last scene in the film that nobody understands, but the CIA wanted to cover up his suicide, because they were afraid of looking weak to the Russians, so they pumped Hunter S. Thompson full of LSD, mushrooms, and gave him a case of Jack Daniel's to take the edge of a bit, and then he ranted and raged out loud, while the NSA wrote all the crazy conspiracy theories down, so they could leak them to the public over the years, so the public would be distracted from the NSA and CIA's really evil long term plans for subverting control of the government of the USA . . .
. . . and it all would have worked, if it wasn't for that meddling Snowden!
. . . Snowden, and the three secret holders of the secret decoder ring, who will reveal the secrets if Putin gets bored of Snowden, which he won't, because he likes sticking a weed up the US governments ass, and he is also afraid that Snowden's Secret Stash contains information about what (and who!) he was doing in East Berlin, while supposedly working for the KGB, but was really a tool of OPEC and de Beer's controlling the USSR's diamond and oil reserves, oh, and nickel, Russia has that, too, just like Canada, where aliens landed a spacecraft built of it in Sudbury, Ontario, just like the spaceship that crashed in Siberia, but was never found, because the Russians hid it to keep the nickel for themselves, and are currently testing the alien space technology on the International Space Station, where secret scientists are also working on . . .
Re:Mod parent up! (Score:5, Funny)
Seeing that I was a young boy in Dallas when this happened and actually got to shake his hand earlier in the day...
Could you please make sure we never shake hands?