MI5 Laptop Stolen -- Along With Top-Secret Data 240
Tuscahoma writes "ZDNet has this story about an MI5 agent who lost a laptop containing sensitive information at Paddinton station. Does this sound like the plot of a bad spy movie (turns out that Julia Roberts picked up the laptop to return it, and now she's on the run for her life from enemy spies)?" This really does sound like a screenwriter's dream. I wonder if the machine's already been fenced, the hard drive wiped, and some Londoner is wondering at the "Property of M15. PLEASE return" in the BIOS.
Gulf War Incident (Score:1)
The general battle plan for the gulf war was stored on a laptop computer that was stolen from an unattended car just before the air war started. See Colin Powell's _My American Journey_
-- Ender, Duke_of_URL
Re:Old news (Score:1)
Re:well trained agents... (Score:1)
A journalist who had pissed off Muldoon (our prime minister) was under survaliance by the SIS (think CIA/Keystone cops). The journo noticed the agent sitting on a park bench opposite his house, and when the agent left, he left his briefcase on the bench.
Naturally the journo looked at the contents of the brief case and wrote an articlce on the contents of SIS agents briefcases. The contents are:
1. Pencil (chewed)
2. Notebook containing record of journo's movements
3. A Pork pie
4. A copy of playboy (well thumbed).
The SIS *never* lived that one down. To this day there are jokes about the contents of SIS briefcases.
Here's one unencrpyted file (Score:1)
#ifndef __css_descramble_h_
#define __css_descramble_h_
struct playkey {
int offset;
unsigned char key[5];
};
extern int css_decrypttitlekey(unsigned char *tkey, unsigned char *dkey, struct playkey **pkey);
extern void css_descramble(unsigned char *sec,unsigned char *key);
What is this?:-)
yes, they should. (Score:1)
It never ceases to amaze me how incompetent the British have been, individually and as a nation, over the course of history. The first bit of recorded history we have of the British is them getting conquered by the Romans. The Romans were far more advanced than the British, yet somehow the British managed not to learn anything from their experience and slip back into the Dark Ages once the Romans left. They then got conquered by the French in 1066, and the conquerors evidently were none too bright either, because they let themselves assimilate.
Britain then spent most of its time involved in some minor intrigue or petty civil war or something of the like, until, blindly following the rest of Europe who had about a fifty year lead, it decided to make a totally inept attempt at gaining an empire. This was successful for a while, but what do they have now? That's right. Nothing. They lost it all. And this is not even mentioning the fact that they had to get bailed out of two world wars by an ex-colony. Or that while Shakespeare may have produced fine literature by British standards, he's not really anything special in the grand scheme of things. Or that certain members of this sorry culture who felt the need to create a series of movies (the Bond films) for the sole purpose of holding on to their last shreds of cultural self-esteem.
So, in short, yes, I wouldn't trust a British spy, or anyone from that sad little island, with ANYTHING without handcuffing it to the poor brute so that he wouldn't lose it.
I'd be scared if (Score:1)
Re:Hmm... (Score:1)
Only the decoys. Why?
Re:Should have used Encryption (Score:1)
Rubber Biscuit (Score:1)
Hope this helps.
Should have used Encryption (Score:1)
Re:Oh yeah? (Score:1)
As in, he was (hopefully!) just kidding...
sensitive information? (Score:1)
Re:Not again. (Score:1)
Even more serious, several months ago Bono lost his laptop that had the lyrics for U2's next album. Fortunately, he got it back and all was well.
Look at it this way: they're not called 'portable' for nothing. It'll happen.
Re:why? (Score:1)
The real question is why the data wasn't removed, or why the agent was allowed to carry his/her laptop out of headquarters. Or here's another one:
Why didn't the laptop have an autodestruct?
Re:why? (Score:1)
Watch the movies! (Score:1)
Skippy
Re:Bad Publicity (Score:1)
nmarshall
#include "standard_disclaimer.h"
R.U. SIRIUS: THE ONLY POSSIBLE RESPONSE
Re:The semi-definitive post about Monty Python (Score:1)
Next Distributed.net Project (Score:1)
Re:old cliche (Score:1)
The cliché he used may have been referring to an oxymoron, but that doesn't make it wrong to call it a cliché.
Re:Bad Publicity (Score:1)
He then looked around the station a bit desperatly (as one would
As for seeing people running through stations... I know that I wouldn't stop them and ask them what they were doing - more often than not, it's someone running for a train just about to leave.
As it is, I have had a laptop nicked on the train... ok, not exactly nicked, but I left my laptop on an underground train, noticed that I no longer had it about two seconds after the train had left, and therefore started shouting obscenities.
I had the train searched two stations later only to find out that some bastard had nicked it.
Re:British british british (Score:1)
Re:Watch the movies! (Score:1)
I know this comment was meant as a joke, but it has a serious answer: the reason you don't keep your valuables in a solid metal case that's handcuffed to you is:
a: It's bloody obvious your valuables are in there
b: You don't want anybody cutting your arm off to get it.
What if... (Score:1)
Scene: office.
RING RING.
"MI5, M's office."
"Moneypenny? This is James. I seem to have lost something."
"James, *really*!"
"Could you take a quick dash into M's office and see if there's a laptop somewhere?"
"Only if you get it from me when you take me to dinner."
"Yes, well.. that's all well and good now - but if it's not there, we might just have a tad of a problem. You see, it does hold a few fairly important documents, and I am sort of responsible for it, you know."
"Is that a yes?"
"I might have to dash off and save the world because of this. That would take prescidence, you know."
"I don't hear a yes in that sentence."
"It's a terribly nice world. I have saved it a few times before. Would be a terrible shame to see it destroyed now, you know."
"James."
"Nice lakes. Beautiful trees."
"JAMES."
"Appealing overpasses?"
"Yes or no."
Sigh. "Yes. Now would you please go look?"
Re:Old news (Score:1)
Re:Hey those wacky kids ... (Score:1)
Around here in SF, the cabs are
Fast, Curtious, Cheap, Safe, choose two...
Oh yeah? (Score:1)
Wasn't some spammer skewered by a certain slashdotter for posting some BS about "being one with the markets"? It's likely that he needed a way to get his get-rich-quick secrets onto slashdot, while still appearing to hate spam.
My point is, don't automatically jump to conclusions on this guy. Maybe he is a dunderhead, but a traitor? That's not quite our place to say.
Re:Same thing happened in Toronto (Score:1)
But MI5 is supposed to be full of a bunch of James Bond-like smart and handsome people, right?
why? (Score:1)
Re:yes, they should. (Score:1)
Yeah, the Australians did a pretty good job in both wars, didn't they ?
They screwed up... (Score:1)
Re:The semi-definitive post about Monty Python (Score:1)
Encrypted, eh? (Score:1)
Every byte was xored with 'A'.
Re:Hmm... (Score:1)
--
DeCSS source code! [metastudios.com]
Re:yes, they should. (Score:1)
--
DeCSS source code! [metastudios.com]
Re:yes, they should. (Score:1)
as for his comments, they're rude but amusing. many americans perceive an arrogance from most britons. i have nothing against britons i meet, 'cept they all seem to look down on me FOR SOMETHING I CANNOT CONTROL. and DAMMIT does it ever irritate me, 'cause i NEVER did anything to them. it's a hateful world and it's silly. cut your shit out, yeah? "fight fire with fire" doesn't fucking work.
--
DeCSS source code! [metastudios.com]
Re:Hmm... (Score:1)
--
DeCSS source code! [metastudios.com]
Hey those wacky kids ... (Score:1)
As the taxi was taking them home it just happened to be approaching the house of a suspected spy. So the top secret agent had the taxi pull up, the passengers spilled out onto the pavement of a quite well to do residential area, then proceeded to scream obscenities through the suspects letter box. Including the immortal line, 'Come on out you commie b*****d, I want to give you a good thrashing'.
Loosing a laptop seems a rather minor misdemeanour after that don't you think?
Re:The only way... (Score:1)
Watch out for the MIBs!
Re:Anyone have better data (a source?) for Toronto (Score:1)
Certainly. A quick google search finds us these two existing references.
This from canadanews.about.com [about.com]
and
another from www.indiatribune.com [tribuneindia.com]
well trained agents... (Score:1)
how? (Score:1)
also, i wonder if there is going to be a reward or something for it...
I have it and have CRACKED it! (Score:1)
This dude knew exactly what Windoze is good for. My commendations for a shrewd hire, MI5! I almost feel bad about embarasing him.
Leave 1 million pounds sterling (in silver!) in the LSU quad fountian at 2AM, April 1st or I will disable this critical piece of software and erase it's entire history. No tricks!
Put the Data on the Net!! (Score:1)
Re:Old news (Score:1)
old cliche (Score:1)
" 'Government Intelligence' is a contradiction in terms. "
Re:Not again. (Score:1)
I just "got" your
Welcome to Slashdot. Please do not feed the trolls.
Re:Don't make me go holy hand grenade on your ass. (Score:1)
----
Don't underestimate the power of peanut brittle
Re:The semi-definitive post about Monty Python (Score:1)
----
Don't underestimate the power of peanut brittle
Re:yes, they should. (Score:1)
----
Don't underestimate the power of peanut brittle
Don't make me go holy hand grenade on your ass. (Score:1)
----
Don't underestimate the power of peanut brittle
The semi-definitive post about Monty Python (Score:1)
----
Don't underestimate the power of peanut brittle
Re:Hmm... (Score:1)
An example would be "enemy" agents would just need to watch for people with briefcases chained to their hands, and they would then know that person is in posession on sensitive information, or at least something quite valuable.
Something you might find interesting. At my place of employment, we do some government contracts, and do have what we deem "secure labs" where Classified and even at times Top Secret data is stored. They have procedures for all electronic equipment (such as physically crushing tapes and hard drives for disposal), however a co-worker of my noted "You know what, I bet they don't zero out the RAM when it goes out of the lab.". Ingenius observation!
Re: (Score:1)
Re: (Score:1)
Re: (Score:1)
Re:Hmm... (Score:1)
I know that the US president has a guy follow him around with a briefcase handcuffed to himself. Supposedly this has to do with our nuclear weapons, but I don't think there has ever been an official statement about what's inside.
I once saw a movie like this too. I think it starred Dolf Lungren(i butchered the spelling there), the Russian from Rocky IV. Anyway he lost the briefcase, and had to save the world and chase down some terrorists in some midwestern missle silo. Wish I could remember the name of the movie.
Wigs
--"Only after you've lost everything are you free to do anything"
Re:Old news (Score:1)
At this rate, the thief will be posting next: "I posted it three days ago because I knew I was going to do it tomorrow." Tomorrow never dies. James Bond will definitely be on the case.
Re:Old News.... (Score:1)
There should be a new moderation category (Score:1)
(Score:-1, Spam)
Re:Rubber Biscuit (Score:1)
Where does it say "Top Secret"? (Score:1)
The article says that the laptop contained "sensitive" data, but it makes no mention of the classification involved. Encryption does not imply a security classification; you'd expect (and hope) that agencies like MI5 encrypt all classified information (particularly if it's left around where any Artful Dodger can pinch it.)
Just the facts, Ma'am.
Re:why? (Score:1)
Not again. (Score:2)
...phil
Re:Hmm... (Score:2)
Re:yes, they should. (Score:2)
On the humour front, I love a line I recall from a humorous TV program some time in the seventies/eighties (cold war still going strong). Sorry if this is offensive
"The Americans are trying to make up for being late for the last two world wars by making sure they are really early for the next one".
Anyway, as to "many Americans perceive an arrogance from most britons" - that does seem quite possible.
But is this because Brits feel superior, because Americans feel inferior or because Americans feel Brits feel superior?
How do you perceive what I'm phrasing now? I'm just trying to be precise...
Oh no! (Score:2)
Wait...that's an I, not a 1...
If 90% of everything isn't crap, your standards are too high.
We will never be able to come to a consensus on which 10% ISN'T crap.
Re:Not again. (Score:2)
Instead of trying so desperately to get First Post, how about giving some detail on the other incident?
-- Give him Head? Be a Beacon?
It's MI5 .. not M15 (Score:2)
--
other agencies in the UK are in competition... (Score:2)
I think MI5 is domestic and MI6 is supposed to be international, but there is overlap.
--
I wonder if they use encrypted ext2fs (Score:2)
I wonder if it was this, or some Win32 based encrypted filesystem.
--
Nit Picking (Score:2)
Doug
The data is safe (Score:2)
And they call it intelligence?!? (Score:2)
Other organizations (Score:2)
We're the guys who are always talking about how the NSA has such amazing technology and can decrypt things sooo much faster than we or distributed.net can come close to, aren't we?
--
linuxisgood:~$ man woman
Same thing happened in Toronto (Score:2)
Maybe Canada and the UK use the same training programs for their agents
Dana
Re:Hmm... (Score:2)
The only way... (Score:2)
be a 'cute little pink iMac' laptop. >:D
Re:Old (this morning) News ? (Score:2)
In this age of unlimited interconnectivity, it's amazing what we consider "Old News" these days.
_________________________
Re:why? (Score:2)
Old news (Score:2)
Re: (Score:2)
I know who took it (Score:2)
Re:Giving the keys to the kingdom to the morons. (Score:2)
Too bloody right they are !!!!!!
As well as the (*irony*) beautifully crafted RIP bill (*/irony), in their infinite wisdom, the UK government now are bringing in a new 'Terrorism Act' which redefines terrorism as being err.... anything that the Government want really. So swiping a lap-top some MI5 civil service type left unattended can get you 'Enemy of the State' status as well....... bit like being chased by the Keystone Cops, I suppose.
I lost my watch, can you break it on slash dot (Score:2)
Re:james bond is on the case (Score:2)
Did they get the fingerprints? (Score:2)
I must say I don't really feel comfortable about all this new technology...
Probably a good thing (Score:2)
It wasn't stolen, it was *sold*, people.
Bowie J. Poag
This is why I want /. to have a user blacklist (Score:3)
Moderating is all well and good, but it won't always catch them before I read a thread. It seems much easier to provide a simple list that I can add 'impulsiveprofits [slashdot.org]' to, and never have to think about him again.
Look at his profile, he's posted 8 times this week, each one spam advertising.
Giving the keys to the kingdom to the morons. (Score:3)
Yes, I know you're watching me...
Stolen Laptops (Score:3)
Both of the computers were recovered.
It was posted [slashdot.org] on Slashdot awhile back, and here [wired.com] is a link to the original story.
On a note to the story, what's going to happen to the MI5 agent? I'm assuming that he will be quietly discharged, and a few months down the road he'll disappear. (That usually happens to clumsy government agents. heh.)
-- Give him Head? Be a Beacon?
Re:What happens to stolen laptops? (Score:3)
I've always assumed that they end up being bought and sold on the internet's own black market... you know... EBay [ebay.com].
I'm only half-joking. Think about it, you have an open market where people all over the world can legally bid on your merchandise, and no effort is ever made to verify that the product being sold is not stolen (though there is some insurance the the product actually exists). Once someone buys it from you it becomes a legal item again, as that person has their "reciept" from the EBay auction...
Re:Stolen Laptops (Score:3)
They're not taking disciplinary action...
Hmmm... (Score:3)
Though actually, I'll bet there are a lot of people who would like to get ahold of the encryption software or hardware (probably hardware), in order to reverse engineer it. Not neccesarily for any bad purposes, mind you, I supsect that people such as Ross Anderson or Lars Knudsen (a couple of cryptographers, for those not in the know) would love to get ahold of something like that and be able to say that they broke a cipher used by MI5.
Also, I doubt this guy is actually a spy of any sort: more likely a desk worker of some sort.
Dilbert Principle (Score:3)
If you're fimiliar with the Dilbert Principle, this agent will be promoted to upper-management in no time at all.
Bad Publicity (Score:3)
Paddington Laptop (Score:4)
A nice family finds the laptop in Paddington Station and decide to take it home and take care of it. It tends to get into little adventures and hilarity ensues.
Re:What happens to stolen laptops? (Score:4)
One of my former roommates bought such a laptop, only to find out later it was stolen from the CEO of a certain major corporation. He found out after looking at the hard drive, which not only had Windows 95 installed on it, but lots of files relating to executive business of said corporation.
The bizarre part is apparently no one at the computer store ever looked at what, besides Windows 95 itself, was actually installed on the thing, nor did anybody try to format the disk.
I don't think they ever caught the thief.....so some details have been obscured.
---
What happens to stolen laptops? (Score:4)
Re:how? (Score:5)
1) The bloke with the Laptop was buying a ticket. This can frequently be a long, tedious complex process - especially at Paddington Station. One of Londons stations which serves some of the rather less -well organised rail companies. And you wouldn't believe how complicated buying a ticket can be in this country at the moment.
2) He put the Laptop down, between his legs.
3) Someone snatched it from behind and ran off. The guy realised at once and gave chase, helped by a couple of Transport Police. But the thief got away.