Star Wars Collector.....Guitars? 242
SchwarzePuppen writes "Fernandes Guitars International in association with Lucas Licensing Ltd., a division of Lucasfilm Ltd., is presenting the Star Wars Retrorocket Collector's Series. Based upon Fernandes' Retrorocket model, these premium Japanese instruments showcase stunning Star Wars graphics created by using a revolutionary computer controlled painting process. Check it out!"
ummmm... (Score:1, Funny)
Re:ummmm... (Score:3, Funny)
Re:ummmm... (Score:1)
Re:ummmm... (Score:2)
Re:ummmm... (Score:2)
--
Evan
Re:ummmm... (Score:2)
On Ebay I'll occasionally sell near mint (maybe worn once, but not washed (never washed! (the value goes waaaaay down if you wash them))) ones for $2700+, fine (worn the same amount of time but with a stray fart mark or other small blemish) for $2100+, good (full blown skidmark and/or other deposits), and fair (corn) for $1000+.
You guys can laugh all you want, but I've been living *very* comfortably for 6 years writing open source code and selling used underwear. You have no idea the number of crazies out there who buy this stuff. Me, I'm in it for the money.
In fact, I also run a business in Japan with my ex room-mate, Masahiro, from college. It's this "private club" that sells underwear to these weird fetishists with deep pockets. All these secretaries, clerks, and a smaller number of upper-middle-class housewives sell us their dirty panties for about $200 each. Sometimes it's more, sometimes less, depending on "what they leave behind". We then turn around and sell them for about 700 bucks a pop. I kid you not.
It's sick, but good natured and pretty funny I think. Nobody is getting hurt, and everyone walks away happy. Though last year I was out there visiting him and we got drunk and for a laugh were laying hockers in the crotches of cheap cotton panties, bagging them up (for maximum freshness) and shipping them off to guys Kyoto, Nara, farming towns outside Ibaragi, you name it.
:)
No, you have to... (Score:1)
SlashDot Star Wars Themes (Score:2)
Sort of like what the Register does from time to time. Corporate themed sections.
Can you just hear the midi now?
There has got to be some way to keep it all "tasteful"
[problem is, some folks _would_ see this as cool.]
ROCK AND ROLL IS EVIL! (Score:4, Interesting)
emperor guitar (Score:1)
Re:ROCK AND ROLL IS EVIL! (Score:2)
Aah, who want's to be a good guy? Think about it:
"I can rule the galaxy as father and son, or I can throw myself down this mineshaft."
Decisions, decisions...
Cheers,
Ian
Re:ROCK AND ROLL IS EVIL! (Score:2, Funny)
It's the name isn't it. The really need to get some PR people in to chage it from the Evil Galactic empire to the Fluffy Galactic Empire.
Re:ROCK AND ROLL IS EVIL! (Score:2)
Re:ROCK AND ROLL IS EVIL! (Score:2, Funny)
You Tell Me (Score:2)
Virg
Star Wars Knobs : Finally!!! (Score:2, Funny)
Ahhh, "Star Wars Knobs"
It's good to see, someone has finally identified who the knobs in the film were
And perhaps if you don't find this funny, it's because it's more a British term then an american. Calling someone a "knob" that is...
Re:Star Wars Knobs : Finally!!! (Score:2)
That's okay...when he first started talking about Knobs, I was thinking of all my pricess Leia fantasys.
Full getup.. (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Full getup.. (Score:2)
Re:Full getup.. (Score:1)
Re:Full getup.. (Score:1)
Wow, they look amazing (Score:3, Informative)
Never buy a guitar cause it looks good (unless it sounds good too).
Re:Wow, they look amazing (Score:1)
Re:Wow, they look amazing (Score:2, Insightful)
Where does the sound come from? (Score:3, Insightful)
My guitar teacher always told me that the sound comes from your hands.
With the amps and digital hardware that is out there today, you can pretty much make any guitar sound like any other. Sure, there is nothing that beats a great classic guitar (My favourite is a Gibson SG), but the idea is not to get hung up on the label, and how much it costs.
If you have talent, and play with passion, you can make magic with the cheapest guitar (as long as it stays in tune...)
Re:Where does the sound come from? (Score:2, Insightful)
It is both psychological, and based on the physical construction of the instrument.
Re:Where does the sound come from? (Score:2)
But that's extreme - he was a genius. And more to the point, he always sounded like Jimi. Most every great guitarist is as recognizable for his sound and tone as his playing, but keep in mind that most of these people found one guitar, or type of guitar, and stuck with it. I mean shit, what would Angus sound like on a Strat? Anything but AC/DC, that's for sure.
The greatest masters can get more and better sounds out of a guitar than an amateur, or even a very good player, but the guitar does matter.
Re:Where does the sound come from? (Score:2)
Granted, but I bet Clapton would still sound like Clapton, regardless of whether he was playing a cheap Squire or a vintage US-made Strat. Van Halen guitar work is recognizable if it's a bastardized Kramer, or an Ernie Ball. The talent shines through regardless.
If you talent and ability, you don't need an expensive rig with loads of effects in order to sound good. That would be the difference between guys like Eric Johnson and Joe Satriani and lame-ass pretenders like Wes Borland.
Ugly Crap (Score:1)
Is there really that big a market for a product that caters to star wars obsessed guitarists?
I nominate this for worst-use of a "revolutionary computer-controlled process".
Re:Ugly Crap (Score:1)
I want my (Score:5, Funny)
Re:I want my (Score:2)
I'll do a version of the "Imperial March" that'll kick Metallica's ass...
This is.... (Score:5, Funny)
"Hey, look man - we ordered a frigging 40 foot deathstar, not 40 inch. It looks like a glitter ball but without the glitter. And what the fuck are they? We wanted chewbacca's , not motherfucking Ewoks"
ObSimpsons (Score:2)
"Filled up with air, it's quite evil and impressive."
"We salute you, our half-inflated superweapon!"
Japanese guitars (Score:1, Troll)
Re:Japanese guitars (Score:1)
REgardless of quality, most of your Japanese manufacturers (Ibanez, Fenrnandes, Washburn) put out aesthetically unappealling guitars.
Re:Japanese guitars (Score:1)
substitute japanese with korean.
Re:Japanese guitars (Score:1)
The only really bad guitars, nowadays, are made in Indonesia, but they are dirt cheap anyways. Korean-made guitars tend to be hit or miss, but are generally improving. Only a few Japanese-made guitars are even sold in the US, but those that are (Yamaha and Fernandes being the main makers), are generally at least worth the price, something that can hardly be said for many American-made Fenders and Gibsons. Now, if you were to talk up a company like Heritage, you'd have a point.
Light saber (Score:1)
(-1 Troll ?)
Re:Light saber (Score:1)
more more more! (Score:2, Funny)
you think i could get the tremelo bar in a light saber do-up? that would be sweet...
Re:more more more! (Score:2)
Oh my... Star Wars condoms too (no joke) (Score:4, Funny)
Have you guys seen the Star Wars condoms?
This is no joke!!!
http://www.toysrgus.com/images-misc/starcondoms.h
Although, I would consider one of the Star Wars guitar straps for my PRS... (I know, geek...)
Embarrassingly (Score:1)
The marketing concept: Fans buy but lack in playing skill; Prof. players won't buy because of embarrassement --->> yeah, we can produce painted crap and sell it overpriced (cos' we'll have to pay 80% to LucasArts anyway)
;)
Message from LucasFilms: (Score:5, Funny)
how low... (Score:1)
com on you star wars lovin' moderators!
btw fernandez sux0r!
Re:how low... (Score:1)
Don't Blame George (Score:2)
Virg
P.S. I don't know if "Gorge" Lucas was an intentional pun or not. If it was, well done.
Optimized for the Empire Strikes Back theme (Score:1)
DUN DUN DUN dun-de DUNN dun-de DUNN,
DUN DUN DUN dun-de DUNN dun-de DUNN,
DUN dun-de DUNNNNN, DUNNN, DUN DUN-DUN-DUN,
DUN DUNNNNN, DUNNNN, DUN DUN-DUN-DUN,
DUN DUNNNNN, dun-de DUNN, dun-de DUNNN.
Re:Optimized for the Empire Strikes Back theme (Score:1)
Well turn it up!
Idea? (Score:3, Funny)
Just how bad... (Score:1)
Lucas: "Quick, sell some more Star Wars licenses, no matter to whom - we can't delay the movie much longer!"
People must be buying them (Score:1)
Someone paid a lot of money to license those marks from LucasArts, and I don't think they did it without conducting at least a little market research. That means that at least a few people out there believe people will buy this. And why not?
Why not believe it, that is. Take a look around you. Plenty of companies are having a great deal of success convincing people to pay them to advertise for them. People pay top dollar for t-shirts with some other guy's name on the front (Tommy Hilfiger, Calvin Klein, etc.). Why would people do that? The way I see it, if they want me to be a billboard for their brand, they should be paying me
Personally, I refuse to wear clothes in public with logos on them. You will never catch me walking around the mall with a big Nike "swoosh" on the front of my shirt. Nor will you catch me in a band playing a "Star Wars" guitar, unless I have a check in my pocket from Mr. Lucas.
Nevertheless, lots of people out there, in their quest for conformity-friendly-individuality, will pay money for something just a little different. And companies are making lots of money off of them. A fool and their money, so to speak.
Understand that the people reading this don't exactly make up an accurate cross-section of consumer society. Of course, we would never buy these things, but we would never gush over the virtues of Windows XP, either, and Microsoft is having plenty of success without us.
So laugh and joke if you will, but in the end, the scariest part about all of this is that these guys will probably actually make a profit on these things. And that truly saddens me.
Re:People must be buying them (Score:1)
Not necessarily a valid assumption; products can bomb even after all the market research possible.
Wasn't the 'Phantom Menace' license a big turkey for most companies that shelled out for it, largely due to the fact that Jabba-Lucas sold it to everyone and their dog?
(Han) Solos! (Score:5, Funny)
I have been *fret*ting about this - to the point I haven't been able to *string* sentences together. I think I will go and *pick* one up... But I wont break my *neck* over it.
(ohmygod - I have turned into Mr Atkins - my old music teacher
Re:(Han) Solos! (Score:2)
If it helps you feel any better: when I read your post, I threw up.
Warning! (Score:2)
Warning. Warning. Fanboy author alert.
Some Things These Guitars don't do or are not. (Score:2, Funny)
It is not an atuhentic guitar from Yoda's hair band days.
Turn into a drone.
Screaming "Luke, I am your Father!" is not a hit song title.
"I met him in a swamp down on Degobah..." (Score:3, Funny)
"The long-term contract I hadda sign
Means I'll be making these movies 'till the end of time
With my Yoda..."
Out of hand (Score:1, Funny)
You know, one of these days the marketing of Star Wars merchandise is going to get out of hand.
-------
http://www.kaejae-worx.com/~don/ [kaejae-worx.com]
The picks are cool, but... (Score:1)
soon available (Score:1)
Ok I like Star Wars and all... (Score:1, Troll)
Yeah, I thought you could.
Lucas and Lucasfilms have become such outrageous merchandise whores they are like a parody unto themselves.
I will seriously have to hear some good review or word of mouth before I even bother seeing this next Star Wars fiasco with or without the BackOver Boys.
I have been let down to hard last time (I should have know better after Jedi "Ewoks and JarJar oh my!).
_______________________________________________
Jimmy Hendrix Light saber (Score:2, Funny)
Imagine if Darth Vader had a guitar in the film... (Score:3, Funny)
"No Luke, I am your bass player"
"I find your lack of a solo disturbing"
"The lyrics are strong with this one"
"Jimi Hendrix has taught you well"
It only makes sense if you play (Score:2, Informative)
Sour Grapes... and a contest (Score:4, Informative)
Anyway, at the risk of giving a decent online business a vicious Slashdotting, check out the link after reading this: The contest is only open to US and Canadian residents age 18 and over, so if you're not eligible, do the site a favor and don't even bother! the contest [music123.com]
I am not affiliated with Music123. I didn't enter the contest.
WTF? (Score:2)
After I finish this post I'll paint my dick black and put a Darth Vader helmet on it. That should make a pretty cool Slashdot story! You see, chicks can't resist the power of the dark side.
You must have confused "news for nerds" with "news for lusers", because no self-respecting musician would play one of these. If I ever see anyone on stage playing a guitar with a Star Wars picture on it, they are getting a beer bottle thrown in their face before they can finish the first song. (I doubt I would be he who casts the first bottle...)
If you still think this is cool, I can also airbrush pretty portraits of the ST-Voyager cast on your instruments. Everybody will see your band and be impressed because it shows that you have enough integrity to pay to be an advertising tool for the Hollywood merchandising machine.
So please, buy one of these and come play in my town. And editors, please keep an eye out for the "Man Paints Own Dick Black and Appends Darth Vader Helmet" story. It will be under the "Star Wars" heading, of course.
What's Next (Score:3, Funny)
not exactly 'Lucille'... (Score:1)
but maybe these guys [nerfherder.net] should...
The Stormtrooper graphic is slightly cool... (Score:1)
The accessories are actually pretty cool. (Score:3, Informative)
The Vader knob is nicely done as well, made of fairly heavy metal (pewter, I guess). The only problem is, it looks absolutely ridiculous when actually mounted on a guitar. I do concur with the general perception here that the paint jobs on the Star Wars guitars rank right up there with the worst atrocities ever committed against a defenseless musical instrument. At least they didn't do a Jar Jar. Yippee!
Is this part of the new ad strategy? (Score:1)
Hmm... I like one, (Score:2, Insightful)
No self respecting guitarist (who can jam), would buy a guitar for some stupid starwars pictures. Not some one like Reeves who used to play with a vibrator, Jimmy Page who was the first to use a bow, Steve and his 7 string guitar, Hendrix who revolutionized distortion, Brian May of Queen, robert johnson, Clapton during cream days, Al Di Meola's jazz guitar and john lee hooker. There's plenty of other great guitarists who wouldn't buy these starwars guitars. It will probably be a gift to some kid who is just learning to play.
Funniest bit for me... (Score:2)
...Is that Lucasarts keep trying to move away from ep 4-6 merchandise now that ep1 is out and ep2 looms on the horizon. And yet the demand for 4-6 vintage continues, as these guitars clearly demonstrate. Where's the Jar Jar axe?
Oh, and they've definitely said there will be no more ep 4-6 games. Several times, if I remember correctly, the first after X Wing: Alliance. Uh, right. I love how Star Wars Galactic Battlegrounds [lucasarts.com] headline art is episode 1, but most of the content is ep 4-6 vintage. Characters, art, storylines, it even opens with that explosive and unforgettable John Williams Ep 4 theme, and Ep 4 art on the menu.
Despite all Lucas's attempts to convince us to the contrary, eps 4-6 are still more evocative and enduring. Hum the famous theme from ep 4 (DAAA-da, da-da da-daaah daah). Now the Imperial March (dum dum dum, dumdy dum, dumdy dum). Now - even though the music was still by John Williams - try to recall any tune from Ep 1. Anything at all. Any luck? Anything?
Picture a rebel trooper from the start of Episode 4. Easy, right? Now picture a Naboo Imperial Guardsman. I've got a vague impression of a coppery helmet or something. Maybe. Did they have cloaks, or were they long coats? Any ideas?
I'm sure I'm wide open to accusations of cognitive dissonance, that I watched Eps 4-6 as a child, and that Ep 1 is equally as memorable to the children that watched it. Mmm, OK, if you like. Let's wait another 20 years and see which characters are still selling them.
Define "sad"... (Score:1)
Having been in working bands for many years, I have to tell you that I would not only not be caught dead on stage with something like this, I wouldn't even want to be seen picking one up in a store. The only comparable guitars I ever saw that actually were pretty cool were the beautiful Fender American Strats with the Vargas pinup girls on them. Now THOSE were cool guitars, even if they were out of my price range.
Huh? (Score:2)
Where did that come from? I don't recalling Fernandes ever making a "premium" guitar, even among the other Japanese offerings.
Ahh... (Score:2)
For the discerning collector, Fernandes Guitars International in association with Lucasfilm Ltd. is proud to present the STAR WARS Retrorocket Collector's Series. Own the ultimate pop culture collectable! Based upon our legendary Retrorocket model, these premium instruments are the ultimate platform to showcase the stunning STAR WARS graphics created by using a revolutionary computer controlled painting process. Whether you choose the Darth Vader or the Stormtrooper model, both of these distinctive instruments feature vibrant images on the body and the neck culminating with the STAR WARS logo on the fretboard. Using the classic Alder body/Maple neck and fretboard platform, the STAR WARS Retrorockets yield rich tone to complement their stunning looks. We invite you to examine these fine instruments at your local Fernandes STAR WARS authorized dealers.
Please! (Score:2)
Star Wars Sex Toys? (Score:3, Funny)
I can see it now,
The Darth Maul 2-Headed Dildo...
Re:Star Wars Sex Toys? (Score:2)
Either you or I has a particularly sick mind, dude... o_O
Grand Moff Tarkin take note (Score:2)
heh (Score:2)
I think someone might be getting a wee bit greedy...:)
Triv
crap guitars dumb idea (Score:2)
HIGH CAMP or ... (Score:2)
Or it would be an admission that I had never crawled out of my parents basement den and had no life (which would make anything I'd play into a joke 'cause I'd have nothing to put into it.)
Some ideas are stoo-pud. This is one of 'em.
More advertising? (Score:2)
Is the increase in ads on Slashdot now extends to putting advertising copy into the text of the story?
Stuff that *really* matters... (Score:2)
Has Lucas Completely Lost it? (Score:2)
I cringe every time I hear Lucas say that he finally made Star Wars like he originally meant to. Gimme a break! And now he's branding guitars of all things? But really, it isn't a suprise, Star Wars was the first of the over-commercialized movies so there's no reason for them to stop now.
What's next? Cars? How about a Milennium Falcon SUV? I might buy one of those...
Brian
Darth Maul version (Score:2, Funny)
Back to computers. (Score:2)
What is the natural resonate frequency of current 8 inch wafers? Could you embed a resonate noise source in the bedrock near a fab and ruin all their chips?
I better shut up before some Mac zealot fixes Dresden and Malaysia; "So pc's have made it to
japanese models are always cooler.... (Score:2)
Cryptnotic
guitar, no knobs..... yessss (Score:2)
N*Sync (Score:2)
Umm. Oh yeah.
Nevermind...
Attack of . . . (Score:3, Funny)
Lucas has pulled this old trick out of the bag. Let me be the first to announce that the actual title of Star Wars: Episode II is to be Attack of the Marketing Drones
-Peter
I Can Hear Obi-Wan Say... (Score:2)
Virg
French or Japanese Rock Bands (Score:2)
Note: I use the term "Rock Band" loosely where the French are concerned because everyone knows there's no such thing as a French Rock Band...
What is the first thing a French Rock Band does when it gets together? Argues about what colour it's guitars are going to be!
(You have to be a guitar player to appreciate that joke)
And the the Japanese? Well there's Loudness [takasaki.net] (Roudness?) "Lock and loll!"
Need I day more?
Ibanez is pretty cool though (Score:2)
The guitarbody paints were ok, the fretboard is too much... UUUH
Re:Ibanez is pretty cool though (Score:2)
Very much agreed. Why do they keep doing stuff like this?? [musiciansfriend.com]
Re:keep selling out, george! (Score:2)
Japanese Guitars & the Frippster (Score:2)
I think Reeves Gabrels has stopped using the Vibrator since he got the Sustainer, but if he gets back into Modern Farming, anything might happen. Weird story about Reeves: he became a friend of David Bowie's since his wife worked for Bowie as a P.A., and only later said "oh, by the way, I play guitar..."
Why are people making sweeping judgements such as "all japanese guitars are knockoffs"? Would you say the same about their cars? Ibanez has already been mentioned, and Yamaha made original instruments such as the SG-series [yamaha.co.jp] in the 70's, and my current objet-de-lust, the John Myung Signature [yamaha.com] bass. Yum...