Lord of the Rings Musical to Open in Toronto

MitsuMirage writes "Mirvish Productions is hosting the world opening of The Lord of the Rings musical in Toronto in March 2006. Originally planned for London, UK and to coincide with the 50th anniversary of the publication the trilogy, the musical was moved to Toronto when no theatre was available." From the article: "With a cast of 50 and elaborate staging, the audience will be "plunged into the events as they happen...We have not attempted to pull the novel towards the standard conventions of musical theatre, but rather to expand those conventions so that they will accommodate Tolkien's material." A look is also available at the BBC. We originally mentioned the musical when it was slated to run in Britain.

Ob: The One Man Lord Of The Rings

[fembots]

40 characters. 3 masterworks. 3600 seconds.

One Man to do it all [onemanstarwars.com].

Re:Ob: The One Man Lord Of The Rings

[Rei]

I can just picture it now... to the tune of "Bohemian Rhapsody"

Gandalf: "I see a little silhouetto of an eye!"
Saruman: "Scaramouche, scaramouche, can hear the eye calling? Thunderbolts and lightning, Lord Sauron is calling thee!"

(switch scenes)

Frodo: Samwise Gamgee!
Samwise: Mr. Frodo!
Frodo: Samwise Gamgee!
Samwise: Mr. Frodo!
Frodo: Samwise Gamgee, off the road!
(chorus): The Nazgul come!!! ... oy, I better stop myself, this could get bad.

Re:rotten fruits of inspiration

[Rei]

Great job ;)

Bah!

[spidergoat2]

I'm waiting for Lord Of The Rings On Ice!

Re:Bah!

[kc0re]

This is about as close as you can get. What's next? Return of the Jedi... the musical?
*starts singing..* you're not my faaaaaaaaaatttheeeeerrr. .....

Re:Bah!

[Shadow Wrought]

Simpsons actually had an episode once in which Mark Hamill did a guest appearance. I don't remember the whole thing, but there was a Star Wars musical and he did in fact sing "Luke be a Jedi Tonight" to the tune of "Luck be a Lady Tonight" from Guys and Dolls;-)

Personally, I enjoyed the over-the-top comments from the producer like, "The environment surrounds us and we are in Middle Earth." I guess their insurance premiums are going to skyrocket after Orcs eat the folks in the mezzanine;-)

Re:Bah!

[drinkypoo]

There's also a classic SnL skit with Bill Murray playing a lounge singer/pianist in what looked like some sort of tropical bar. I can't really remember many of the lyrics, except something about darth vader in that big scary mask.

Re:Bah!

[carpe_noctem]

I would like to take this opportunity to pre-emptively mock the first slashdotter that will inevitably reply to your post with the exact quotes (including corrections for your paraphrasing) as well as the Simpson's episode number to which you are referring.

It was Guys & Dolls in a dinner theatre

[sbszine]

And the marquee read:

MARK HAMILL is NATHAN DETROIT

PEPPER STEAK is THE ENTREE

Re:Bah!

[Rei]

Note: If this comment happened to spoil anything for anyone, GO AND SEE STAR WARS (IV, V, AND VI) RIGHT NOW!

If that comment happened to spoil anything for anyone reading this, I suggest that they make sure to collect an ample supply of ochre and azurite before the winter snow sets in so that they can whittle away the hours by adding new pictographs to their cave walls.

But as soon as Gandalf faces the Balrog, ...

[burgburgburg]

the entire rink would melt. And where's the fun in that? Scores of soggy hobbits. That would make any child sad. And imagine this smell: wet Gollum.

Nuff said.

Re:

[account_deleted]

Comment removed based on user account deletion

Re:Bah!

[macaulay805]

I'm waiting for Lord Of The Rings On Ice!

... and StarWars in space!

... ohh wait ...

Re:Bah!

[ackthpt]

I'm waiting for Lord Of The Rings On Ice!

How about Lord of the Rings the Flash:

The ring ring ring ring ring ring
In Hobbiton!
Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring
In Hobbiton!

I've got this feeling
so appealing
for us to go out and destroy the ring - RING!

Re:Bah!

[dokkeri]

I'm waiting for Lord Of The Rings "The Musical" and "On Ice" extended DVD boxed set.

Re:Bah!

[fitten]

The Riverdance Director's edition?

Oh my god that scared me...

[Alpha_Traveller]

I thought for sure they were talking about "Fellowship" the Tap-Dancing hobbit musical in LA...

http://www.dailytrojan.com/news/2005/01/21/Lifesty le/TapDancing.Hobbits.Bring.New.Light.To.ring-8375 27.shtml [dailytrojan.com]

Oblig Simpsons

[da3dAlus]

"I love legitimate theater."
"This play has everything!"

I can't wait to see the parody on the Simpsons...

[ackthpt]

Hum along...

Luke, be a Jedi tonight!
Just be a Jedi tonight!
Do it for Yoda, while we serve our guests a soda.
Uh, and do it for Chewie and the Ewoks, and all the other puppets ...
Luke, be a Jedi tonight!

starring

[PoopJuggler]

Troy McClure as Frodo

Re:

[account_deleted]

Comment removed based on user account deletion

Re:starring

[Rei]

Hey, if you do bad enough of a cast, it could be amusing (sort of a "Springtime for Hitler" effect):

The voice of the ring: Michael Dorn ("Worf")
Frodo: A muppet, voiced by Leonardo DiCaprio
Sam: Lewis Black
Bilbo: Danny Devito
Aragorn: Robin Williams
Boromir: Dick Cheney (come on, who else would try to take the ring?)
Gimli: Jack Nicholson
Gollum: Carrot Top
Gandalf: Uri Geller
Saruman: David Blaine
Arwen: Joanie Lauer (Chyna)
Legolas: Howard Stern
Galadriel: Martha Stewart
Directed by: Quentin Tarantino
Special Effects

Re:starring

[plasticsquirrel]

Phil Hartman is dead, you insensitive clod!

Looking forward to the giant battles

[The Amazing Fish Boy]

That ought to be an interesting "interpretation."

I seriously wonder (not being involved in theatre at all) how they plan on pulling that off. In the movies they used CGI, but on a stage both the space and number of people is limited. Any theatre buffs have any idea on how they'll pull this off?

I'm not buff...

[ImaLamer]

... but I assume that once you fill the stage you make it start to look like there are a lot of people and you get the point.

Either that or they will use a background which has faces painted on them (and they would also move that back and forth).

On the other hand, they may not show the battles at all because theater is supposed to capture the drama and comedy and so forth, not the action. They may simply say "The battle of Evermore has started" and show the fall out (dead bodies, etc).

Re:Looking forward to the giant battles

[SiO2]

Any theatre buffs have any idea on how they'll pull this off?

I'm not a theater buff, but my best guess is poorly.

SiO2

Re:Looking forward to the giant battles

[owlstead]

I'm not a buff, but I presume they rely on human imagination. Something that's aplenty in humans, with the possible exception of - well - you.

Re:Any idea on how they'll pull this off?

[Bagels]

Reminds me of the Far Side cartoon... bunch of knights preparing to joust, while one of them is crying "Skins? Why do we *always* have to go skins? I'm telling you guys, this is a bad idea!"

Bombadil

[ctrl-alt-elite]

Here's hoping they cut Tom Bombadil out of this one, too...

Re:Bombadil

[LurkerXXX]

Are you kidding? With all his singing, he's the most appropriate character in all the books to end up in a musical. As for the rest of the story in musical format? ugh.

Re:Bombadil

[Spy der Mann]

Here's hoping they cut Tom Bombadil out of this one, too...

Yeah, but unfortunately they don't want ENTIRELY to cut him out.

"Oooh jar jar found a ring!!!"

Starring Troy McClure...

[sczimme]

"Hi, I'm Troy McClure! You might remember me from such Tolkien epics as Hobbit 2: There and Back Again, Again and Dial M for Mordor..."

/ Oh, my god - I was wrong:
/ It was Frodo all along...

Re:Starring Troy McClure...

[blackmonday]

Bah, nowhere near as good as "Hobbit on a Hot Shire Roof".

You'd figure that with 50 years to plan

[winkydink]

that they could have managed to reserve a theater. :)

A Slashdot First!

[Chatmag]

All the hotel web sites have been slashdotted.

Re:A Slashdot First!

[tomhudson]

Poster wrote:

A Slashdot First!

All the hotel web sites have been slashdotted.

I doubt it - it's in Toronto:

... in Toronto in March 2006

Seeing as Toronto is the 5th-largest city in North America (after Mexico City, Los Angeles, New York, and Chicago), and #1 on the B*O*R*I*N*G index ...

http://www.city.toronto.on.ca/economic_profile/ [toronto.on.ca]

One quarter of Canada's population lives within a 160 kilometre (100-mile) radius of Toronto.

... it's the city everyone else in Canada loves to hate [tt]. Until a couple

Bah! Nothing compared to...

[Dirtside]

Fellowship! [fellowshipthemusical.com] The Musical Parody of "The Fellowship of the Ring." Playing in Hollywood for only another week or two, unfortunately, but hopefully they'll continue it somewhere down the line. We've seen it twice, and it's damn hilarious.

Got the script here

[grub]

I'm off to destroy the One Ring... after which all the hobbits will siiiinnngggg...

My pressshhhhious... my pressshhiiiouuusss... we must get the ring backs to ussssss...

Frodo! Frodo! Be careful where you trod, lest that Golum take the ring whilst you nod...

Sam, you have eaten all the fooooood. That was very ruuuuuude! I'm most upset... as your lack of respeeeeeccttt...

To the mountain! To the mountain! The ring will go in the fire, or I am a big fat liaaaarr...

What shall I do? The ring calls me so... I must say NO! I must say NO! Into the fire you go!

My pressshiousss... I will not linger! I will get you and eat his finnngeeerrrrr!

Into the lava, into the lava!

[chorus] We're a happy Hobbit town! Our frowns have all turned upside down!

[curtain drops]

"Lord of the Rings Musical"?!

[Anita Coney]

April 4th is coming sooner and sooner!

Oh come on

[Anonymous Coward]

alright, this is "aesthetically" more ok compared to the tons of merchandising (games etc u name it) but still.... Give us a moments pity!

LOTR was made into movie, fine, good, soundtrack was awesome (i play it regularly) but how about spending some book time with it?

i've seen the movies so much i feel an urgent need to refresh myself on what really happened... and now this? please....wait 15 years?

Re:Oh come on

[Valiss]

refresh myself on what really happened

That kinda says it all, doesn't it?

Run away! Run Away!

[craw]

This musical [yahoo.com] looks more appealing to me.

I have no idea how they are going to handle the flying cow.

Featured songs

[Dark Paladin]

One (sung by Gandalf, to the tune of "One"):

Well it's - one Ring,
To bind,
And hold them in the darkness -
Tonight

It's One, but we're, not the same
We'll just hurt each other

I'm Too Sexy (Sung by Aragorn):

I'm - to sexy for my sword,
To sexy for my shield, to sexy for my shirt
So sexy it hurts,

And I'm, to sexy for shampoo,
My hair is long and greasy,
But girls don't think I'm freaky,
No way I'm becoming the High King

I'm a Ranger, you know what I mean,
And I'm dating a real hot Elf girl
Oh, an Elf girl, yeah.....

Fish Heads (Sung by Golem)

Fish heads, fish heads,
Rolly polly fish heads
Fish heads, fish heads,
Eat them up - yum!
(OK, so no word changes - but why mess with a classic?)

Re:Featured songs

[hcdejong]

That's because it's a U2 song, lyrics here [lyricsdomain.com].

Re:Featured songs

[hcdejong]

Duh. It was written by U2, but Cash covered it on one of his last albums (American III: Solitary Man). That's where I knew it from, so that's how I found the lyrics.

Tom Bombadil?

[Geoffreyerffoeg]

I hope they keep Tom Bombadil in this adaptation.

Re:Tom Bombadil?

[Malc]

With all his songs? That would surely leave insufficient time to tell the rest of the story!

Re:Tom Bombadil?

[owlstead]

So short after the release of the film, it would baffle at least half of the crowd. Who's that guy? He wasn't in the original movie, or was he? They should not mess with the script! After seeing a man turn into a bear, wolfs and big spiders before even getting near Mordor that half will have left and demanded their money back.

Something tells me...

[JeTmAn81]

...this isn't going to help eliminate the running jokes about gay subtext between Sam and Frodo.

Re:

[account_deleted]

Comment removed based on user account deletion

The greatest adventure

[ExistentialEngineer]

If the 'inspired' music of "the Hobbit" animated movie is any sort of indicator we could be in for a treat!

Hat Trick

[MudButt]

LOTR... Musicals... Slashdot member...

I am now in possession of the trifecta of "never to be laid". =)

For people unfamiliar with Canada

[EulerX07]

Toronto is our version of Minas Morgul. Their motto is "one city to rule them all, from the center of the universe, for the rest of time".

Wait until it hits the road...

Re:For people unfamiliar with Canada

[EulerX07]

Well, Toronto is right next to the border, like Minas Morgul. Baradur would be Ottawa.

Sweet!

[d_jedi]

The preciouses is ourses!

You're damn right I'll have opening night seats..

Forget seeing this on Broadway...

[Alpha_Traveller]

There's no way Matt Groening crew will pass this up. Guaranteed this is going to be a Simpsons episode about this.

Re:Forget seeing this on Broadway...

[slothman32]

I liked the "Planet of the Apes" musical better. Hows come they never make a real show like that?

Re:Forget seeing this on Broadway...

[drsquare]

At what exact point did the Simpsons turn from an amusing satire into a lame cartoon that latches onto every single fad, celebrity and political-issue-of-the-day, turning each into an instantly-forgettable episode with dull stereotypes and unfunny jokes?

Re:Forget seeing this on Broadway...

[Alpha_Traveller]

I dunno. I'd give you an exact date but their Web site leaves me smitten with banal hilarity.

Oh god

[Anonymous Coward]

I immediately had a vision of that guy Michael Flatley from http://www.lordofthedance.com/ [lordofthedance.com], playing the part of Frodo, tippity-tapping his way across Middle Earth to Mordor destroy the One Ring, while a bevy of Hobbits, Elves, Dwarves, and Men dance a jig behind him with arms straight down at their sides.

Re:Oh god

[Valiss]

And when it's "LOTR: On Ice," we can get Brian Boitano to play lead.

Canada, eh?

[meikon]

Shit, Thomson, wasn't it your responsibility to book us a theatre??
---
Frankly, I'm a little overfed on LOTR now. Don't get me wrong, best book in the world, but too much hype.
---
Curious of the prices, I typed in 'princess of whales toronto' in the Firefox address bar. Little did I know that I would end up on a page for sex tourism...I couldn't duplicate it, so I must have typed something wrong. http://rotator.siam-data.com/Choice.html [siam-data.com] for those interested :P

Re:Canada, eh?

[Anonymous Coward]

i doubt Aragorn went to Gondor for sex tourism reasons though, so that would be a wee bit out of context

Re:Canada, eh?

[Malc]

The one thing that is more disturbing than you incorrectly spelling Wales is all the web sites out there that Google turns up with the same mistake!

Typo

[Anonymous Coward]

(...) it was slated to run in Britain.
should't be 'it was slated to ruin Britain'?

Re:Typo [tt]

[tomhudson]

(...) it was slated to run in Britain.
should't be 'it was slated to ruin Britain'?

... until the Queen said "Off with his head!".

Normally, I don't cotton to royalty, but I'll make an exception in this case

Just part of my boycott of everything "Lord of the Ring"-ish. Besides, you KNOW they would have had to find some sinecure for Sir Elton John ... and maybe another one for His Royal Highness Dumbo, and/or Lady Parker-Bowl-legged.

Re:Typo

[catdevnull]

Ohh, if I only had Mod points--you'd get a funny.

Like my momma always says...

[Bodhi_D]

The ultimate form of tribute is jazz hands.

I wonder if an opera would be good...

[SmokeHalo]

...with Elmer Fudd as Sauron.

Sauron:
Kill da hobbit!
Kill da hobbit,
With my orcs and flying Nazgul!

Frodo:
Flying Nazgul?

Sauron:
Yes, flying Nazgul!
Let me give you a sample...

DOH

[Spy der Mann]

Do you realize that was a parody of "The Ride of the Valkyries" by Wagner?

Your joke would have been excellent, but see... Wagner and Tolkien's works are well... what can I say... similar. And I doubt an opera about LOTR couldn't possibly match Wagner's masterpiece of art.

obligatory 1970's reference

[pinkfalcon]

Do they have Orc's singing "Where there's a whip, there's a way"?

Re:obligatory 1970's reference

[pizzaman100]

They should include the The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins [tolkiencollector.com] by Leonard Nimoy too. ;)

Can't wait till it gets to Broadway

[arhar]

!!! This is going to be AWESOME.

"No theater available"?

[fm6]

That sounds strange, considering how many theaters there are in greater London. The official line is, "no theatre [was] available to accommodate the massive and technically complex three-hour production". I suspect there was, but the one in Toronto was cheaper. So if the Toronto production doesn't do well enough to justify the expense of staging it in Toronto, the show will never make it back to London.

Sounds like a "Whose Line" skit...

[jpellino]

And who can forget those hairy-foot-tapping show tunes,

"I'm Just Wild About Merry"
"Send In the Orcs"
"Hello, Gollum!"
"Get Me To The Crack On Time"

I wonder how much...

[CaptainPotato]

... Wagner influence there might be in the staging of it. Regardless of what his politics may or may not have been, the Ring Cycle (Der Ring des Nibelungen) occurs to me as being a way that it could be done. Aside from the obvious comparisons to draw (the length of the thing comes to mind... imagine sixteen or more hours of LOTR musical), I imagine that opera would be a more suitable format than a musical (as other posters have quipped, after this it goes on ice...).

From the first Act:

There is one sword
That he could not shatter
Nothung's splinters
Would baffle his strength,
Could I but forge
Those doughty fragments
That all my skill
Cannot weld anew.
Could I but forge the weapon,
Shame and toil would win their reward!

Sound like something from which the LOTR musical could take inspiration from?

Re:I wonder how much...

[Futaba-chan]

If it's anything like the Toronto production of Siegfried [ringcycle.ca] that I saw last month, Shelob will be a troupe of dancers, Mordor will be abstract art, and the whole quest will take place in Frodo's head. Somehow, I don't think that's what they have in mind....

Re:I wonder how much...

[CaptainPotato]

Wagner is an idol of elements of the far right, and he certainly had some troubling views on Jews, for instance. However, regardless of whether this is an issue, the Ring Cycle would provide a good model for how to interpret LOTR for the stage.

Re:I wonder how much...

[CaptainPotato]

... but don't forget the rest of the sentence: "and he certainly had some troubling views on Jews, for instance". Take a look at: this article [jewishvirtuallibrary.org] for a little more information.

Re:I wonder how much...

[hachete]

Wagner was one of those who *promoted* anti-semtism as part of building a larger Germany. Even in the context of the times, he strayed heavily towards being actively anti-semitic. But he didn't go as far as touting extermination. That would be left to Cosima to support. His operas are heavily orchestrated towards building a Germanic state, dredging up the stories of the Volk, and some say making them implicitly, if not explicitly anti-semitic. I think this makes him than averagely bound to the anti-semitic

I can see it now...

[CupBeEmpty]

A whole chorus line of Orcs in straw boater hats with Canes dancing around Minas Morgul while an off stage voice sings a (very baritone) ditty about crushing all the friends of the light.

[lights fade as Mount Doom erupts dramatically in the background and immediately fade in stage left]

A drunk Sam and Frodo jaunt through the Shire [stage right to left] singing "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine..."

[qeue Gandalf stage left]

Startled Hobbits quickly turn to overjoyed hobbits and hug the old Wizard. Ho

A little information about Ed Mirvish

[asoap]

You guys might find him interesting.

Here is a link to the wiki page [wikipedia.org].

He started a business called honest Eds, which is now a landmark in Toronto. Imagine a crummy little store, with a GIANT "Honest Ed's" sign, and thousands and thousands of light bulbs lit up just like the las vegas strip. All the lights turn off/on in the usual patterns. One thing to note also, I don't know if this is true, but one of his marketing gimmicks was to stand infront of his store with a big fist of $1 dollar bills. He would bet people walking by that they couldn't go into his store and buy something the liked for a dollar. Regardless if it worked or not, people did go inside and find all of his great deals.

Oooh

[MightyMartian]

FIRST came the books! Instant classics, beloved and read the world over.

THEN came the pretty decent BBC series. Not bad. Amusing and listenable

THEN came the horrific attrocity known as Bakshi's films. Jesus cried when it was made.

THEN came Peter Jackson, self-style Hobbit. What a pity this unwashed Kiwi halfling couldn't have even made a shallow attempt to follow the story.

FINALLY the musical. Sure to satisfy the cravings of every semi-literate retard!

Re:Oooh

[MightyMartian]

I don't think the films were so great. The only real improvement was Boromir, and what they did to Gimli was idiotic, and the sign that shallow, infantile minds were at play.

Boooooring...

[The Fanta Menace]

Ok, it's flamebait, I know, but really...

Lord of the Rings and musical in one sentence? Either of them, alone, is bad enough, but together, I'd rather spend several hours listening to Donald Rumsfeld recite his favourite passages from Revelations...

Re:Boooooring...

[hiryuu]

...I'd rather spend several hours listening to Donald Rumsfeld recite his favourite passages from Revelations...

Be careful - you may get your wish.

:)

Buh?

[Gothic_Walrus]

How has the thread gotten so far without a link to The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins [tolkiencollector.com]?

Christopher Lee!

[Rakarra]

Please tell me that Christopher Lee will be singing and dancing in this. It's been 21 years since his last singing role [imdb.com], I'm sure Saruman has a great voice!

Re:Christopher Lee!

[Elf-friend]

Personally, I'd rather see him as Gandalf for a change. He was Tolkien's choice, afterall.

My question is...

[DarkMantle]

Actually, two questions.

1. Will it have Tom Bombadil? I was really hoping to see him in the movie
2. Who the hell is gonna sit there for 10 hours? (Based on extended movies lengths) And in the end still only see half what was written by tolkien.

So if they film the musical...

[real gumby]

...it'll be done in Bollywood, right?

Re:

[mr_pollock]

Beautiful! Any word if this is coming to the United States?

Re:

[account_deleted]

Comment removed based on user account deletion

Re:Quote

[jumpingfred]

Frodo of the nine fingers and the ring of DOOM.

Re:Quote

[Dr. Evil]

Why does he have nine fingers?

Re:Quote

[CrackedButter]

A huge fucking book AND probably over 9 hours of film making led up to the scene where they finally throw the ring into Mount Doom and you're asking why Frodo had 9 fingers. Whats a matter did the most pivotal scene in the entire trilogy which the film had been building up to catch you off guard?

Re:Quote

[JeTmAn81]

Hey you guys, now you've spoiled it for him...I tell ya, it's getting harder and harder for people who live under a giant rock in this day and age.

Re:Quote

[rizzo5]

You recognised the original quote, but not the followup? Inconceivable, indeed!

Frodo of the Nine Fingers
And the Ring of Doom
Why does he have nine fingers?
Where is the Ring of Doom?

Re:Prior art!

[Futaba-chan]

The punch line, of course, is that the Ring Cycle [ringcycle.ca] is already coming to Toronto next year....

Re:Lord of the Rings 2005

[SuiteSisterMary]

Actually, it's been done. [lordsoftherhymes.com]