Personality Secrets in Your MP3 Player 326
Jeremy Dean writes "Once past saying 'hello' and 'how are you?' to someone you've just met, what is next? How do we make friends and get to know other people? Psychologists have talked about the importance of body language, physical appearance and clothing but they've not been so keen on what we actually talk about. A recent study put participants in same-sex and opposite-sex pairings and told them to get to know each other over 6 weeks (Rentfrow & Gosling, 2006). Analysing the results, they found the most popular topic of conversation was music. What is it about music that's so useful when we first meet someone and what kind of information can we extract from the music another person likes? "
Likes country: emotionally stable (Score:5, Funny)
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Re:Likes country: emotionally stable (Score:5, Funny)
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The awful truth (Score:5, Funny)
Pop: "Something sad happened but I didn't let it get me down"
Country: "Something sad happened but I'll get over it"
Indie rock: "Something sad happened and I want to kill myself"
Metal: "Something sad happened and I want to kill you"
There's plenty of sad bastard country out there, but it's not what most people have in mind when they ask "what kind of music do you like?"
Me too! (Score:2)
Ugh. (Score:5, Insightful)
Well, that's probably (another) reason that I manage to have a hard time creating memorable "hooks" with other people; I have practically no interest in keeping up with or finding new music. (It isn't that I don't enjoy nearly all forms of music, mind you, it's just that, for me, there's approximately zero value in seeking out new things to listen to.)
On a related note, the common geek tendency to disparage everyone who doesn't have the same eXtreMely obscure/not-yet-trendy/running counter to current popular opinion taste in music as he/she does is very lamentable. Seriously, most people don't use their taste in music to define themselves, so judging people on that is very narrow-minded.
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Agreed. This is why ask questions about likes: "So, what do you think of Brand New's new album?" or, "Are you a fan of Fall Out Boy?". Sometimes I'll work in a band refe
Re:Ugh. (Score:5, Insightful)
The article is about 18 year olds, many of whom do define themselves through their musical tastes. They are of necessity narrow and shallow--they have rarely killed or fought for their life, rarely had lovers or children or freinds die, rarely risked everything to achieve a dream. They haven't had time to do anything with their lives yet. And in the West there are few tribal institutions for them to attach their loyalty to: family is thankfully not very important, religion ditto, and while a few get latched onto sports teams of one kind or another the crass commercialism of popular sport is such that a tribal affilliation with a team is too lame even for the average teenager.
To be useful as a source of the tribal feeling that all humans crave a thing must be public and communal. What is more public and communal than music? One day the teens will grow up and find a tribe of their own that is based on genuine common interests, if they're lucky. But until then they will find solace in being part of a tribe defined by the music they listen to.
This is why so many bands are decried by their early followers as "sell outs" when they become popular. It is not the kind of music they are making that has changed, but the dillution of tribal feeling, of belonging, of being part of a select and special group, that causes the psychological pain.
Because... (Score:5, Insightful)
If you and I like the same artists, chances are relatively high we hold the same views.
Not to mention when I'm blasting Emperor or Dimmu Borgir or Dying Fetus, you won't ask me to put on some Kenny G.
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Re:Because... (Score:5, Insightful)
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I want my rockstars dead!!
Bill Hicks says it best =)
Myers-Briggs Jung (Score:5, Interesting)
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I like Jazz, Bluegrass, Country, Classic Rock, Death/Black metal, Jungle, Breaks, "political rap" (i.e. immortal technique) Opera, Ambient, Noisecore, Power Metal, Mathcore, Tech-Step, Trip-Hop....
What kind of personality would you put that at?
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That's funny, because based on what my personality is IRL matches exactly ZERO of the things that identify ENTP.
I will never tell someone they are wrong to have an interest in something, nor have I ever found anyone "boring."
EVERYBODY is an interesting person. That doesn't mean they are good or bad. However, I have yet to meet or see a single solitary person that I would call boring. In addition, I have yet to meet or see a single solitary person that I would apply a "personal
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I am an INTJ (and I suspect that although we only represent 1% of the population we're pretty common on Slashdot) and one of the more obvious characteristics of our personality type is an interest in everything
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As far as listening alone or at a party, I actually prefer to listen to whatever the majority of the people at the party are listening to. I find it easier to converse with people I don't know if they are in an en
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Mathematics is the universal language. Music expreses that, and also the language of the soul, so it has the best of both worlds.
--
Computer & Music Joke: Rember, C# is still a Db.
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Your response implies I am referring to corporate acts who have their lyrics and music written for them. These are not artists, they are performers.
Now, there is nothing wrong with that. They do what their abilities grant them to do.
However. My point here is that considering that your initial reaction was to assume that I am a "sheep" following whatever happens in the mainstream just goes to show how unbelievably shallow you are.
There are musicians that write thei
It's easier than thinking (Score:4, Funny)
Re:It's easier than thinking (Score:5, Funny)
As yes, the notes of love.. (Score:3, Funny)
and it's made for me and you!
Why don't, we get drunk, and screw...
Squirt me three random songs! (Score:3, Funny)
New line in a bar on a Saturday night -
"Squirt me three tunes, and I'll let you know if you can buy me a drink."
Re:Squirt me three random songs! (Score:5, Funny)
Not many use the word "squirt" in a bar without intending to follow it up with some form of fluid exchange. This can too often be misinterpreted as a bad pick-up line, and in some cases might actually get you tossed out of the bar like some kind of pariah.
Not that, uh, I know about this, uh...first-hand....
Shit.
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Music is essentially universal (Score:2, Insightful)
It breaks the ice.
Music is "easy" (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:Music is "easy" (Score:5, Insightful)
1) Music comes in much smaller and more discrete bites, and therefore more can be judged faster.
2) Music is easier to say "Yes" or "No" to. Most movies fall in grey areas, where you didn't like it, "but it had redeeming values" (or, corollary: it "wasn't perfect but it was still really good"). In short, people don't qualify their music tastes as much as their movie tastes.
3) Music, because it is generally easier to create, as a whole has a much larger spectrum. So niches are easier to find (and accentuate.) Again, more music means more niches.
4) And finally, music (again, because it's easier to create and has more niches) is more divided sociologically than movies are. When someone says, "I like country & western and I can't stand rap", they are making as much a statement about their sociological identity as they are about their music tastes. Someone who says "I like comedies, but I can't stand thrillers" isn't making the same kind of statement. And more to the point, there's nothing sociological that precludes someone from enjoying Pirates of the Caribbean or Superman Returns. For music, that's a lot less true.
In short, cinema as a whole must cater to drawing in as many fans as possible. Music simply doesn't need to cater to the whole, because the niche in and of itself can sustain music. Movies are "for the masses"; but if you don't like one thing of music, you can just try another.
Great idea for next /. poll (Score:5, Funny)
* Retreat back to cube and resume coding
* Avoid eye contact and hope someone else comes along to relieve you from having to make conversation
* Launch into a rant
* "I don't have friends/conversations/etc, you insensitive clod!"
* Generic Cowboy Neal reference
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* Launch into a rant
I know you were joking, but ranting is a pretty good bonding strategy. Disliking the same things is a much better ground for friendship than liking the same things. NYT [nytimes.com], PDF paper [ou.edu], Wikipedia [wikipedia.org]
Oh yeah, I can see the conversation... (Score:5, Funny)
Girl:Hey
Guy:Hey, I've got a nano!
Girl:I have to go... and... wash my hair...
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Random sample (Score:5, Insightful)
Or am I too cynical?
Re:Random sample (Score:5, Interesting)
1) How drunk you got last night.
2) Which lecturer you hate the most.
3) Have you written that stupid paper yet.
4) Are you going to the club tonight.
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High Fidelity (Score:3, Insightful)
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I don't think there's anything profound here. (Score:5, Insightful)
Unless your a farmer or a meteorologist, you can't talk for more than a few seconds about the weather.
Sex, politics, and religion are way too dangerous.
But there is a lot of music, there is a lot to talk about, the chances are that two people selected at random know a lot more of the same music than the same books, the same movies, etc.
You can care enough about music to have a spirited, passionate discussion about it, but few people care so much about it that disagreements could lead to violence, or even to the breakup of a budding friendship.
If you take someone home to meet your parents, you don't need to worry about whether that person's taste in music will match your parents or not.
Re:I don't think there's anything profound here. (Score:5, Funny)
Music just has the right characteristics to be a good conversation topic.
I strongly disagree. Music is often thought to be good conversation topic and a good meter for determining what type of personality someone has. 90% of the time actually starting such a conversation, however, results in canned responses based upon what social circle the person is in and what they think is "cool." Most younger people especially tend to listen to music to make a statement, rather than to reflect their real tastes. The average conversation about music goes something like this:
So, what kind of music do you like?
Umm, you know, indy music, like [pop_band_x] or [pop_band_y]
Really, huh those are okay, have you heard [band_z]
Umm, no, are they good?
...
Such conversation is dreadful and useless. If you want to get to know someone and make an impression, you need to be a bit more interesting yourself. I like to start conversations with something spontaneous, like, "hi you don't know me but I think you're really sexy. Can you think of any circumstance under which you'd murder someone?" Or start off by breaking them out of the conversational mold. I met some really interesting people by introducing them to my friends like, "hey everybody, this is my old friend Veronica, she once punched a homeless guy who said her shoes were ugly." If the random girl I'm referring to as "Veronica" is an interesting person, she'll almost always run with it and I met someone fun. If not, she runs for the door or her boyfriend and I haven't wasted 5 minutes repeating the same boring conversation about music.
My advice to everyone is to ignore the topic of music and develop some character. Be confident and interesting and you don't have to worry about picking "safe" topics to meet people.
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Amen to that. I only started making friends in any number when I stopped caring so much about whether I made them, whether I impressed people, what they thought of me, etc. Just hang around with people who make you feel better than you otherwise do, and avoid people who make you feel worse, while being yourself. That's the bot
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Ah, a man after my own. I wanna start up a surrealist greeti
Just note (Score:3, Insightful)
When 50 or 70 year old persons meet they probably would talk other things.
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Honestly, if someone found that they were incompatible with me because of the music I listen to, I would have a hard time believing that they were worth it.
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My wife and I have relatively little overlap on the music we 'really' like, and I don't see what the big deal is. Hell, I didn't even notice that until awhile after we were married, and
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Her - I love you (Score:5, Funny)
Her - Yeah, they are a great band.
Phooey (Score:4, Funny)
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Yeah, that weeds out the hotties real quick.
Apologies to all the smokin' female Linux users out there...
personalized (Score:3, Interesting)
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The Billboard Hot 100
Irreplaceable
This Ain't A Scene, It's An Arms Race
Say It Right
It's Not Over
I Wanna Love You
I've heard of Beyonce, Snoop Dogg, and Nelly. I don't know that I've heard any of these songs. It's possible that I've insulated myself sufficiently by listening to Old Fogey Radio.
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I haven't bothered to tuneprogram the radio in my car (that I bought 5 years ago) and that tends to be where I hear "popular" music.
I do however listen to a lot of music though....
Do they still have charts? (Score:2)
my ipod (Score:2)
Re:my ipod (Score:4, Funny)
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It's interesting that you should bring that up, because the results show that you have latent beastality tendencies... and you touch yourself at night.
Just kidding. As other people have mentioned, this study doesn't mean much at all. People just talk about music because it's an ice-breaker. It prevents dreaded conversational deadspace that can make even the most extroverted of us akward. Can you t
shit (Score:5, Funny)
Comment removed (Score:5, Funny)
A human being != a personality (Score:5, Interesting)
I hate shit like this. Question: Do you want to know how to make friends, or do you want to make friends? Because when you start to look for the secret procedure behind friendship, you start looking at people as if they were abstract personalities, with some quanitifiable set of properties, and you stop looking at them as human beings. And this attitude can prevent you from actually connecting with them. It's completely absurd. Not everything is meant to be turned into cold science.
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I know, I felt kinda weird after posting it. I tend to get worked up by this type of discussion (on or off Slashdot). That's just me. I wouldn't call sociology "evil", if it's not taken too seriously. I just didn't like the pretentious tone of the summary (and article) and I'm also interested in seeing how people react to a comment like that on Slashdot.
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This is a psychology study, it's supposed to be cold science. Do you complain about the categorization of insects being cold science because it describes the beautiful butterflies in the same terms as the cockroaches? These people want to know how we make friends, regardless of whether they have any or not.
Socializing is an exercise in not being too boring but not being too excentric either. If somebody's first topic is the collected works of Tolstoy, they may learn from a study like this that they might
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Say what you will, but humans are automatons to certain extent, enough to have predictable behavioral patterns.
Re:A human being != a personality (Score:4, Insightful)
Do you want to know how to do math, or do you want to do math?
For many people in the world the answer is do math because they have never seen it as being particularly difficult; as an example, until my forth year of mathematics in university I never bought a text book because the material was obvious. As hard as it is for most of us to understand there are millions of people in this world who have difficulty making friends, getting into romantic relationships, and functioning in a work place; by studying how personal relationships are formed, and how people interact, you can figure out a way to help people with their own issues. There is value in this work regardless of whether you see it.
science != a personality (Score:4, Insightful)
Re:A human being != a personality (Score:4, Interesting)
Because when you start to look for the secret procedure behind friendship, you start looking at people as if they were abstract personalities, with some quanitifiable set of properties, and you stop looking at them as human beings.
Long ago I read a book where two characters were discussing personality types. One character claimed he categorized people into two groups. He'd show people the idyllic garden behind his home and eventually tell them he had built that small hill, and moved those rocks so they looked like they had fallen there, and reshaped the stream to run a different way. One type of people were appalled that the beauty was not natural and felt disillusioned and the other group were amazed by his ability to create beauty and enlightened by the knowledge. The claim was that some people prefer to believe in the beauty in the natural world, while others prefer to see the beauty inside a person expressed.
I don't believe in such dichotomies, but I think there is a valuable lesson there. Understanding the processes that lay behind some phenomenon need not devalue that phenomenon and may in fact enhance one's appreciation of it. Every day I am appalled by the ignorance and meanness and stupidity and selfishness of people. They lie right to your face, care nothing for people they profess to love, and are unthinking animals in making decisions, while they are cold and calculating robot lawyers when it comes to justifying those same actions.
Every day I am amazed by how amazingly generous and giving people are. People will ruin their entire day to avoid disappointing a friend, children put us all to shame with their friendliness and wonder and lack of prejudice, and people with completely different world views and beliefs can set that aside to do some good in the world.
I've read more psychology books than some psychologists I know. I am very good at understanding people's motivations and feelings. I understand and implement a half dozen different models of the human animal. I don't think that stops me at all from being a very social person and I don't think it objectifies people. I don't have any trouble making friends and always seem to be meeting new people.
I think it is important to recognize that understanding the human mind in a scientific sense does not mean you cannot understand it from a human perspective as well, and empathize and connect. These are not mutually exclusive points of view.
Re:A human being != a personality (Score:4, Informative)
Definitly nothing profound (Score:5, Interesting)
Most 18 year olds don't have profound achievements that have a commonality. If you have kids, you don't mind hearing about other people's kids. If you're in physics club, you probably don't want to hear about a wrestling match.
Studies also show that teenagers blow at empathetic responses, so it harder to tell if someone is interested by subtle clues. If someone follows along on the conversation, its a go... So music is the most common ground shared by all teens.
Except me, i really didn't ever listen to the radio.
Subconscious Connection? (Score:2, Interesting)
It's not that it's useful (Score:2)
Relationships are about emotion, there's not always logic to how or why we do things.
playlist sharing (Score:3, Interesting)
It would be nice to have this feature on the (wireless/bluetooth enabled) digital music players: an option to share the playlist, so I could get my cellphone and read (and store) the info on the music being played.
You're defined by your subculture... (Score:4, Insightful)
I can determine more about a person I meet from, "I like Brittney Spears and Justin Timberlake" or "I have two playlists: GWAR, and other" (including their willingness to admit either of those) than I can from half a dozen other interests and opinions.
Clothing often crosses subcultures, as do slang, political opinion, religious belief and behavior, but there are very people whose personality and approach to life will defy their music tastes. When was the last time you met a hyper-aggressive, Type-A asshole who lists smooth Jazz before Metallica?
Of course, when you meet someone who says they like "everything" and then proceeds to list mainstream rock AND mainstream rap, know the conversation doesn't need to proceed any further because they're a fucking toolbox.
Safe and sure (Score:2)
One, it's a common interest. Lots of people don't read. Many aren't into painting or cars or gaming or photography or other hobbies. But it's rare to find a person so uninterested in music that they can't converse on the topic at even a superficial level, even if all they hear is what's playing on the radio at work.
Second, it's a safe topic of discussion. It's not religion or politics, and it's even unlikely to segue into those topics.
So "when you first meet people," it makes sense that it's
for the same reason music is useful in religion (Score:2, Interesting)
there are very valuable emotions communicated by very shoddy musicianship. there are very bland emotions communicated by overproduced garbage. the conglomeration of what people like is telling at least of what they're going through at the moment.
it
Music Is Universally Enjoyed (Score:3, Informative)
I know people who hate television and movies, calling them "useless time-wasters". I know people who don't like ice cream and hate dogs. I even know somebody who hates nearly everybody else. But music is different. Some people don't notice it much, but even they know what they like.
People know that their musical choices are very personal. If you ask what kind of music they like, they get a chance to talk about themselves. And many are proud of their musical taste. It's like fine wine. Some people are connoiseurs, and some just drink whatever is available. And a wine expert generally just LOVES to talk about wine.
For anybody who thinks that showing disdain for some form of music somehow increases their credibility on the subject, remember this: nothing turns off somebody else faster than saying their favorite band/artist sucks.
Deaf? (Score:2)
Trust me. If you could hear it, you'd like it.
Besides, even deaf people can dance if the bass is loud enough. You dance to a beat - not to a melody.
The great communicator (Score:2)
Instant Agreement and Non-threatening (Score:2)
First of all it is all about preferences so it isn't intimidating
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Furthermore, once you've convinced yourself you like them you often will so it won't fall apart later.
Jazz is deep and intellectual? (Score:2)
And the Italians utterly pwn the French in dining. French cuisine is for people who have decided they hate food, and that meals must be an ordeal to be endured rather than enjoyed.
Hey, mod me +5 in-tuh-lektual, baby!
The Onion has been at this for a while (Score:4, Interesting)
The Onion has a feature called Random Rules. [avclub.com] They take a celebrity type person and put their MP3 player on random. Then have the person being interviewed discusses what happens to come up on their player.
It's actually a pretty good feature. I especially liked the one with Gerald Casale.
How do we get to know other people? (Score:2)
The Culture of Music The Sound of Music (Score:3, Interesting)
IAAMusician, and let me be the first to tell you that coming to this realization was not easy at first, probably due to the fact that I had to first learn and internalize most of the fundamentals of music, which kept me focused on the structural aspects. That being said, I still have no idea what music is or why I enjoy to make or listen to it. I do know that most people refuse to believe that the reason they don't like rap music isn't because of the sonic structures or lyrical content of the music rather the fact that they cannot relate to the culture that is responsible for its creation. Most musicians I know refuse to believe this as well, and while I cannot even come close to proving my thoughts on this, I know that if it is not the most important aspect of music, it is at least partially true.
For example, last night, I was coming back from a friend's place, and I took a cab, not the easiest thing to do right after the Superbowl ends, especially in New York City. I was lucky enough to get a cab almost right away. The driver, as usual, was minding his own business. He was listening to a type of ethnic music typically known as Hindustani, originating from the Northern parts of India, near the Pakistani border, but also closely associated to Bangalore. I'm pretty in to this kind of music, the vocal styles, the tablas, the sitars here and there. However, he was used to the fact that most white dudes would probably rather listen to classic rock and offered to change to a radio station of my choice. I told him that I was enjoying this music, and immediately, he sprung to life! He handed me the album case and started telling me all about who this guy was that had written the songs, who the singer was, and tons of other information about the music and the culture behind it. Apparently, it was all written by this man, Rabindranath Tagore [wikipedia.org], who my cabbie enthusiastically told me was the first person from Asia to win the Nobel Prize, AND, that he had written all of his work in his native language. He was overflowing with pride. Not wanting to be the cultural hog of the conversation, he grabbed another CD case from the front and passed it back. It was a compilation of the Greatest Love Songs, with stuff like Genesis, Fleetwood Mac, Foreigner, etc... He had grown fond of listening to an Adult Contemporary station here in NYC and bought some albums and he was really in to it! I told him that if he enjoyed these songs, he would love one of my favorite songwriters, Burt Bacharach. At the end of the journey we both exchanged information about the artists we had recommended to each other and completed our cultural exchange.
So your musical preferences will have a direct relation to your cultural preferences. How all of this applies to todays hyper-culture, with it's multitudes of sub genres and opinions scattered left and right, I have no idea. I'm still trying to figure that one out. I wouldn't have a hard time believing that if two people are both into neo-industrial-hardcore-skate-ska that there would be enough of a cultural/personality match for them to make a good couple.
So, no offense to all of you Julie Andrews fans out there, but the sound of music really doesn't seem to be as important as the culture of music.
Similar tastes matter (Score:2)
A lot of my friends have overlapping taste in books - and I have often discovered this after making friends. Presumeably the same applies to music.
No music personality (Score:2)
Hey baby, are you alliance or horde? (Score:5, Funny)
Too bad for those who don't listen to music much (Score:3, Insightful)
I'm very knowledgable about art, history, literature, science, religion, politics, cooking, gardening, hunting, woodworking, and a jillion other things. I like to learn about things that interest other people, and I like to talk about things that interest me. I can hold a conversation and engage in a discussion with someone who holds a different viewpoint, without being disagreeable or opinionated. I have a lot of interests, but music isn't one of them.
But because I don't listen to music, the most obvious middle ground is closed to me. I have no idea who any of the big music stars are these days, and do not recognize a hit tune when it is played for me. Even worse, when I say, "I don't listen to music.", it's assumed that I am a completely uninteresting shlub who's leisure hours are filled with TV sitcom reruns.
Music and Personality (Score:3, Insightful)
Musical preferences, like many other preferences, are formed as much by associations and practice as anything else. Often we might not like something at first or be neutral to it but then when your friends keep putting it on you associate it with good times (or just by repetition) and start to like it. One reason that our musical preferences say things about us is that it reflects on who are friends were and what sort of environment we grew up in. Another reason is that these very societal stereotypes affect what music we are likely to be open to liking.
For instance I know several people who weren't particularly into jazz (never really listened to it at all) but they view themselves as intellectuals and having heard that jazz is so complex and deep if you only know how to listen to it they decided to start listening to jazz. Of course they eventually started to get into but I think they could have done the same thing with Britney Spears if they had honestly believe that the music was really deep and complex.
In other words how we feel about music is often just a reflection about the societal stereotypes we have about that sort of music.
If you don't believe me try and think of how many people you know who claim to hate country music who have ever given it a really fair chance? Same with rap. However, pick a song they think they 'should' like and they will give it a much better chance. Particularly with rap and country our likes/dislikes have a lot to do with our attitudes to social class.
I know many people won't believe me because it very much *feels* like you are responding to something in the music. However, just think about how strong the placebo effect can be and how good we are at tricking ourselves and ask whether this is a plausible explanation.
Because Simpsons references don't always work... (Score:4, Funny)
I have this theory that all things in life can be referenced by something on Simpsons, Futurama, or Family Guy. So like an idiot, I tried testing this theory once, with an actual pro football cheerleader I was out on a date with. (Yeah, wrong time to test that theory).
We had things to talk about, but when a moment of dead silence came, I did the Ralph act, "So... do you like... stuff?", and she gave me a WTF look. Yep, I quickly moved onto music and other safe topics.
Figure this out (Score:2)
Yello
Boston
Mozart
Blue Man Group
Green Day (the original stuff)
Yeah, go ahead. Just TRY to put me in a category.
Someone's musical tastes can only give you so much information about someone. The only way to know what a person is really like is to spend time with them.
Musical ?Taste? (Score:3, Interesting)
LOL who listens to lyrics? I just hear the melody (Score:3, Interesting)
If the words are the most important part of the song - then fine go listen to it, but you can drop the music part, since it's not the focus, and call it