Forty-Three Monkeys Escape From US Research Lab (bbc.com) 138
An anonymous reader quotes a report from the BBC: Police are on the hunt for 43 monkeys who escaped from a research facility in South Carolina, after a keeper left their pen open. The rhesus macaque fugitives broke out of Alpha Genesis, a company that breeds primates for medical testing and research, and are on the loose in a part of the state known as the Lowcountry.
Authorities have urged residents to keep their doors and windows securely closed and to report any sightings immediately. The escaped monkeys are young females, weighing about 7lbs (3.2kg) each, according to the Yemassee Police Department. Police said on Thursday that the company had located the "skittish" group, and "are working to entice them with food."
"Please do not attempt to approach these animals under any circumstances," police said. The statement added that traps had been set in the area, and police were on-site "utilizing thermal-imaging cameras in an attempt to locate the animals". Police say the research company has told them that because of their size, the monkeys have not yet been tested on and "are too young to carry disease." In an update Friday, the local police department said the monkeys are still staying around the perimeter of the facility. "The primates are exhibiting calm and playful behavior, which is a positive indication," the department noted.
"They're just being goofy monkeys jumping back and forth playing with each other," Alpha Genesis CEO Greg Westergaard told CBS News Thursday. "It's kind of like a playground situation here."
The article points out that all the escaped monkeys "carry no contagious viruses because they were too young to test, according to the lab. "
"Please do not attempt to approach these animals under any circumstances," police said. The statement added that traps had been set in the area, and police were on-site "utilizing thermal-imaging cameras in an attempt to locate the animals". Police say the research company has told them that because of their size, the monkeys have not yet been tested on and "are too young to carry disease." In an update Friday, the local police department said the monkeys are still staying around the perimeter of the facility. "The primates are exhibiting calm and playful behavior, which is a positive indication," the department noted.
"They're just being goofy monkeys jumping back and forth playing with each other," Alpha Genesis CEO Greg Westergaard told CBS News Thursday. "It's kind of like a playground situation here."
The article points out that all the escaped monkeys "carry no contagious viruses because they were too young to test, according to the lab. "
Cold weather? (Score:3)
My first concern is cold weather. South Carolina has relatively mild winters, but freezing temperatures at night are common.
Wikipedia says the monkeys' range extends into high Himalayan areas and they can tolerate some cold.
I wish them well. I hope SC is happy with their new monkey colony.
Re: Cold weather? (Score:2)
Re: Cold weather? (Score:3)
Re: Cold weather? (Score:5, Funny)
That's okay. SC is a red state, but if they make up to Maryland one of the monkeys can declare itself male now and all the other monkeys have to go along or else.
SC being a red state, you should be worried about one of the locals breeding with the monkeys.
Re: Cold weather? (Score:5, Funny)
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Monkeys are pretty vicious; I think they'll stick with their sheep.
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First will be 53 GOP senators demanding pork-barrelling and a loophole law for their state.
Inflation is dropping and the economy is booming: If Trump sat on his arse, he would be the greatest president ever, in 4 years. The problem is, the GOP has majority and wants to make the country in their Fundamentalist Christian image. The leaves Trump blocking an anti-abortion crusade: Losing that fight will have massive political fall-out.
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I'm curious what they think for former alleged president will do for prices. The R's weren't really voting against inflation. To listen to them, they were voting against higher prices and they expect that asshole will make prices go down. Were he to manage that, the economy would go into a tailspin. I don't think he can do that and any of his tariff and immigrant policies will make prices go up.
But the addled faithful believe he has a magic button on his desk that will make prices go down...they aren't the
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"Fundamentalist Christian"
FUCK THIS SHIT. This needs to be fought back against and buried once and for all. Fuck them, their sky daddy, and their rapist priests.
If they must deport anyone, they should deport every Christian fundie in this goddamn country
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I don't care if this gets modded to -100. I'm tired of these fuckloafs being given free reign to abuse people including children, and freely push their fascist shit because "fReEdOm oF rElIgIoN". BULL-FUCKING-SHIT on that. What these fuckloafs need is a fucking BEAT DOWN and getting shamed and spat on on the streets.
Good thing one of them isn't near me hear and now, because I would give that person a punch in the fucking jaw.
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Wait until you find out there actually are gay penguins.
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cause there will be at least 30 new monkeys in about 5 months.
You’re thinking of rabbits, bud.
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Re:Cold weather? (Score:4, Insightful)
Police say the research company has told them that because of their size, the monkeys have not yet been tested on and "are too young to carry disease."
Too young to carry disease? I don't think it works that way. I'm pretty sure even young monkeys can be exposed to, and contract, disease.
Re:Cold weather? (Score:4, Insightful)
They are too young to have been yet part of the medical experiments in which these monkeys are inoculated with pathogens.
Re: Cold weather? (Score:3, Interesting)
Re: Cold weather? (Score:2)
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>If they are really harmless there wouldn't be a problem approaching them.
They may not currently have any infectious diseases, but they're still animals that will likely attack if you try to grab them... and they're strong and fast for their size, and probably pretty smart too.
Do you want a monkey bite?
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Rhesus Macaques are carriers of Macacine alphaherpesvirus 1, better known as B-Virus. In non-human primates, it's annoying, roughly the same as a cold sore in a human. In humans, however, it has something around an 80% case fatality rate with limited treatment options available.
The colonies are routinely tested for B-Virus by PCR, but it's possible that the virus is dormant in a given animal, resulting in a negative test. While that animal wouldn't be able to infect a human AT THAT MOMENT, they could start
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My first concern is cold weather. South Carolina has relatively mild winters, but freezing temperatures at night are common.
Wikipedia says the monkeys' range extends into high Himalayan areas and they can tolerate some cold.
I wish them well. I hope SC is happy with their new monkey colony.
My first concern are the hosts of (US television) ABC's The View roundtable talk show.
Why?
These monkeys will work for peanuts and they are a darn sight more entertaining than those endlessly whiny women.
After all, ABC is a BIG CORP, part of ABC Disney (or whatever they are called) and it could be justified as A Cost Cutting Move by management ...
cuz layoffs at BIG CORPs are So In Vogue Right Now.
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I ask that you try not to look like an idiot in future posts. You have no authority to define someone else's right to comment here. Also, your assertion, "if you can't watch these, then you have no right to comment because you are uninformed" implies very clearly that anyone not watching 2 YouTube videos is uninformed on a topic. This further implies that there is no other information available that is valid for those that desire to be informed regarding the topic.
I ask this because I think you are accurat
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looks like the truth hurt so you needed to lash out, just saying
insults speak volumes about the insulter
Well that's just great (Score:5, Funny)
Who's going to moderate Reddit now?
Re:Well that's just great (Score:4, Funny)
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On the other hand, the force to combat the 30-50 feral hogs is now in place.
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Sorry, not happening in this universe.
"Beyond that, a single chimpanzee has just a 5 percent chance of randomly typing the word “bananas” within its lifetime, they found. The odds of a chimpanzee typing a short phrase like “I chimp, therefore I am” are 1 in 10 million billion billion."
https://www.smithsonianmag.com... [smithsonianmag.com].
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Mod that one funniest, but the story was quite productive for Funny.
Isn't this the precursor to Planet of the Apes? (Score:3, Interesting)
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They're all female, like in Jurassic Park.
Life finds a way.
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*Planet of the Lesbian Apes*
Just edit the original 1968 poster a bit: "Man hunted... caged... forced to WATCH THEM mate... by civilized lesbian apes!"
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This is the plot of a book I read when I was young, "Summer of the Monkeys" [wikipedia.org] and it looks like they made a movie about it as well. With the current Hollywood trend to only do sequels or remakes I doubt there will be much interest in your original script.
Re:Isn't this the precursor to Planet of the Apes? (Score:5, Funny)
The lead monkey successfully won a presidential bid, so this tracks.
Very organized! (Score:5, Funny)
The 43 monkeys were extremely organized and their escape was well-planned, because each monkey had a folder, making 43 folders.
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playground situation (Score:1)
"They're just being goofy monkeys jumping back and forth playing with each other,"
I'm struggling to see how commenting on slashdot is different.
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One monkey at a time.... (Score:1)
I liked it better when it was only 13 (Score:2)
"There's no right. There's no wrong. There's only popular opinion."
- Jeffrey Goines
Only 43? (Score:2)
No way they'll be able to type out MacBeth before the heat death of the universe.
Re: Only 43? (Score:3)
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12 Monkeys is all you need.
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Ah, another former theater person. Techie or actor? I was the lighting guy, finally got so disgusted that I swore I'd never go back until they replaced actors with holograms. (Of course then you wouldn't need the lighting guy any more.)
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Richard III ? Haven't heard it referred to that way, no, but it was the first Shakespearean play that I watched back in high school. I was so enraptured watching the Stratford (Ontario) Theater Company's really remarkable lighting system that I lost the plot of the show entirely. BTW, they found his (Richard's, not Shakespeare') grave just a few years ago.
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Recommended viewing order: S3E4, S4E6 and then it doesn't matter because you'll binge watch.
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Used to watch it when my wife was on late shift at the store, she doesn't care for it at all. Haven't watched any for the last few years now that we've retired. She loves Mr. Bean though.
It is good... (Score:1)
Which movie is this? (Score:2)
Re: Which movie is this? (Score:1)
At least it was 43 Monkeys and not 12. But still if some kid runs across one in their back yard and gets bit. I'd start to worry.
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Outbreak https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0... [imdb.com]
Political Hot Zone (Score:5, Funny)
Forty-Three Monkeys Escape From US Research Lab
Is this about the House election? :)
This could make a really great indie game. (Score:1)
43 Monkeys have escaped your research lab!
Build crazy monkey traps to bring them all back to the lab.
It'll be a 2D side scroller puzzle + physics sim, a bit like Untitled Goose game but with a hint of Bad Piggies and World of Goo. But with monkeys. Right, like build the contraption, and then find a way to lure the monkey over to the trap.
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It only takes 12 monkeys (Score:2)
it's all fun and games until the future shows up to correct the past
https://www.youtube.com/watch?... [youtube.com]
some day one of these mistakes will wreck everything for everybody
Army of the 12^H^H43 monkeys (Score:2)
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Will a hot tub do?
Who set all these lab monkeys free! (Score:2)
Sounds like the're having fun. (Score:2)
Maybe I'll join them.
An ape escape? (Score:2)
Look for the police sirens on their heads.
I think I made a mistake (Score:2)
I thought it was 12 monkeys.
labs (Score:1)
This is effectively a call to arms (Score:1)
Plague Inc. (Score:1)
https://plagueinc.wiki.gg/wiki... [plagueinc.wiki.gg]
I like monkeys (Score:1)
I like monkeys.
The pet store was selling them for five cents a piece. I thought this was odd since they were normally a couple thousand. I decided not to look a gift horse in the mouth so I bought 200 of them. I like monkeys. I took my 200 monkeys home. I have a big car. I let one of drive. His name was Sigmund. He was retarded. In fact, none of them were really bright. They kept punching themselves in the genitals. I laughed. They punched me in the genitals. I stopped laughing.
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Lol, I haven't heard that one in many years.
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Try again. I know you can be intellectually honest just this once if you try reaaaaallly hard and ask a 6 year old for help.
I know you can do it!
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Comparing people to children is something people do in confrontation during emotional weakness.
The hope being that it'll make the opposing party feel some degree of insecurity.
But usually it's a sign that whoever is doing so is themselves insecure and flustered as if they had anything more biting criticisms they would have used them.
From now on I will provide you with valuable human insights you're incapable of having on your own.
Like a Jiminey Cricket for spergs.
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I was not comparing the intellectual weakling to a child. I was suggesting he find a child because that child will be able to identify the issue where he can not.
But you understood that.
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lol why would you respond to me?
For a troll you’re not very good at this.
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I'm not a troll. That's why. If you feel trolled that's on you. It's an inner state not an external cause. Perhaps therapy would help you resolve this issue.
Isnt this the begining of most terror movies? (Score:1)
Spanking the monkey (Score:2)
Brings a whole new concept to "spanking the monkey" up in dem dar hills.
Chernobyl-level reaction. (Score:1)
When Chernobyl disaster happened, we were also instructed to keep doors and windows closed securely, and wait out.
With that level of fear, I suspect these monkeys are not as innocent as it seems.
We should know more what had they been doing with them.
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Give it a few weeks (Score:2)
The gators will solve the monkey problem.
I hate every ape I see (Score:2)
How does 1 pen door lead directly to outside ?? (Score:2)
Shakespeare? (Score:2)
Were they experimenting with the infinite monkey theorem, trying to reproduce the complete works of William Shakespeare?
Douglas Adams — 'Ford! he said, there's an infinite number of monkeys outside who want to talk to us about this script for Hamlet they've worked out.'
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All they need is a few more monkeys!
12 Monkeys (Score:2)
They started out as the Army of the Twelve Monkeys, but the movement has really caught on and their ranks have swelled.
The Secret of NIMH (Score:2)
First it was the rats, now they’re enhancing monkeys. Stealing power is going to be the least of our worries. Lol. Those of you that get this reference, youre as old as me! Lol
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"Bookworm, run"? Though that was a chimpanzee, and I don't remember the rats. Could also be "The rats of NIMH", though that's missing the monkeys.
Slashdot is a tabloid (Score:2)
Slashdot turned into a tabloid.
Once upon a time, it was news for nerds, it even had a partner Geekshop.
Now it is a tabloid for grandma with fearful stories about escaped monkeys.
Summer of the monkeys. (Score:2)
Some kid is going to have a good time.
They may be happy & playful now... (Score:2)
Can't even wait for OrangeManBad's inaguration (Score:2)
You have to do it now to give him cover. Wait until he's the president, and then destroy the world, so it'll be his fault.
The great escape (Score:2)
Good news! (Score:2)
At least it wasn't 12 monkeys!
Let's hope nobody's seen... (Score:2)
Brad Pitt and Bruce Willis hanging around together...
What pandemic will we have in 2025? (Score:2)
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Asperger's?