The Virtual Teacher

Roland Piquepaille writes "Researchers from Illinois and Florida are developing a networking system which will create virtual representations of real people to improve our knowledge. They will use artificial intelligence and natural language processing software to enable us to interact with these avatars. The goal of the project, sponsored by the National Science Foundation (NSF), is to give us the possibility to interact with these virtual representations as if they were the actual person, complete with the ability to understand and answer questions. We should see the results at the beginning of 2008 — if the researchers succeed."

Yes that's all well and nice ...

[Average_Joe_Sixpack]

but can I frag them with a rail gun?

Good idea

[Kohath]

It will never be able to be used to help in public schools because it doesn't pay union dues.

There's a problem with this.

[jeevesbond]

The problem is as soon as the teacher says anything like: 'Now class, I'd like you to help me do this...' WAAAJAANNAAA!!! Everyone gets a massive fine from Amazon for infringing their 'Humans Assisting Computers [slashdot.org]' patent.

I wonder if Amazon will use special lawyer avatars to hand out the court summons?

OK, so virtual teacher, not virtual student.

[Runefox]

How does Virtual Teacher discipline Non-Virtual Ritalin-Required Student? Shock buzzer? Stern language? Complete room lockdown with titanium sheeting? Lasers? How does Virtual Teacher respond to vulgarities? Slang?

"Yo', homes, teach me sum alg'braw 'n' shiz so I be up on da fo'-one-one and tut' me sum ladayz, fo'shizzaw muh nizza, biznatch."
"Please repeat query."
"Yo, man, dis shit is whack."
"Please repeat query."
"What da fuck."
"Please refrain from using profanity."
"Hey, fuck you, man."
"LOCK DOWN IN PROGRESS."
*CLANG CLANG CLANG*
"Cleansing speech orifice with Javex. Please wait..."

Fine, so long as ...

[PPH]

... they have a Mary K. Letourneau avatar available.