Review: Evolution 83
Our main characters are misfit scientists led by Duchovny who is as stone cold as ever playing Ira Kane. Along with the Make Seven Up Yours guy, they are teachers at the local community college. Ira has a cloudy history and Mr. 7-Up has no future (unless you count coaching the women's volleyball team). They don't quite fit in at the university, and they are busy hitting on the ladies (no, they don't administer shock therapy based psychic tests, but they might as well have).
So we've also got Stiffler's Mom's Son Seann William Scott playing the dummy wanna be firefighter who discovers the meteor that crashes out in a field in their desert town. The scientists go to the library and collect slime samples. Oh wait, no. They go to a cave and collect biological samples. Sorry, my bad. It's immediately apparent that the meteor contained some strange new life form (10 base pairs!) that evolves much faster then our pathetic (4 pairs!) earth life forms do.
Of course the government has to be called in led by a mean old general and the beautiful Julianne Moore who's slumming it playing Allison Reed, the military scientist who reveals that Duchovny and her go way back. She's probably the best actor but she doesn't really do much funny stuff except fall and bang into doors. I found it super strange watching her act this way. I hope she was paid very well for this part. Or at the very least, had tons of fun making it.
The plot progresses obviously with... Evolution! The alien life forms evolve from yellow mushrooms and worms into new exciting computer animated monsters. Our trio of heros continue to fight the authorities as well as these strange new monsters that wreak havoc on the small town. And despite the differences between Dana and Venkman, the sexual tension continues to grow. A great minor part by Dan Akroyd provides several good laughs- his delivery can still make a scene even when his lines aren't the best.
The computer animation and special effects is all reasonably good. But I didn't feel like it broke ground like it's stepbrother did. In Ghostbusters, the groundbreaking special effects advanced an entertaining plot and developed interesting characters. In Evolotion, effects no better then any film we've seen in the last few years advance a tedious plot and develop bland characters with obvious quirks taped onto them.
Allright, after all that cynicism, I have to say that I actually enjoyed a lot of the movie. Besides the obvious numerous parallels between this film and that "Other" movie, we've got a few pretty good action sequences, and a ton of jokes, and some of them are funny. Some of them don't involve asses, butts, colons, or farting! And the movie builds up to an exciting climax where the good guys must execute the biggest butt joke of all and destroy the stay puft marshmellow man, or their town is doomed.
But I laughed out loud many times. The movie has many awkward parts (random pauses for laughter which never came in the audience I was sitting in, characters explaining things like idiots which is supposed to be funny, but isn't) but check your brain at the door, forget you saw Ghostbusters, and have some fun. This film isn't going to innovate special effects. It's not going to have characters that we're going to remember in 15 years. It's not going to have scenes that you and a group of friends can quote verbatim after 3 beers. But you'll probably have fun for an hour or so. And the effects are good enough that it's worth seeing on the big screen.
In short, if you miss it, don't sweat it. But if you go, you'll probably have fun. And try to count the ghostbusters parallels while you go. Then make a mad lib and construct your own Ivan Reitman special effects blockbuster script and see if you can sell it to Dreamworks.
Oddball Offtopic Side Note For the first time ever in Holland, a total stranger noticed the Slashdot t-shirt I was wearing and asked for an autograph when I fessed up to who I was. Even tho he was the dude selling the tickets, it didn't get me in for free :)
Re:'Takedown' kicks this movie's butt (Score:1)
Best Quote... (Score:1)
Re:Mr. 7-Up Has A Name!!!! (Score:1)
Hey, I remember Ghostbusters... (Score:1)
Face it. You're getting old. Movies don't mean the same thing to 15 year olds now, as they did when you were 15.
Can't you tell?
I agree with Rob on this one... (Score:1)
LOTS of sci-fi references, though. 2001 and Ghostbusters have been pointed out, but I was seeing Andromeda Strain through the whole thing. A friend of mine said it reminded him of some radio program he heard as a kid.
Re:Burgess Shale (Score:3)
One of the clips showed a weird multi-segmented bug with stilt-like legs, very similar to one of the weird fossils in the burgess shale.
I think I know the one you're referring to -- it has stiff spines on one side and little knobblies on the other. The story I heard about it is that scientists decided the spines were the legs and came up with all kinds of wacky theories about what kind of environment such legs would be advantageous in.
Until one day some guy came along and said "Fellas, that's the top half." And all kinds of theories went bye-bye as biologists scratched their collective beards and went "y'know..."
I have no idea if it's true or not, but That's What I Was Told (m*tt*!)
Product Placement (Score:1)
Fifth Element (Score:1)
Just to go OT here... I thought it odd that in fifth element they decided that Freakishly Complex Genetic Structure automatically implied Artifically Engineered Organism...
In the recent film Gamera: Guardian Of The Universe, they examined a cell sample of a monster and found it only had a single pair of genes, and since our genetic code was largely evolutionary leftovers, this meant that this was an artificially engineered organism. I found that to be a more satisfying line of reasoning than Greater Complexity == Crazy Genius Science
Bummer (Score:1)
Re:Anal retentive biology correction (Score:1)
Even worse, the number of base pairs has nothing to do with the rate of evolution :-)
Product Placement? ("Spoilers") (Score:1)
My review. Ahem. (Score:1)
Oh my god what a horrible film. Yes, it has a few funny moments. So do my bowel movements. I'm serious, it's that kinda funny. Like this laugh of relief, of, "Oh god, thank you for bringing me a joke that wasn't as horrific as the last fifty I've had to listen to."
Avoid! Run away!
Re:Mr. 7-Up Has A Name!!!! (Score:2)
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Re:Mr. 7-Up Has A Name!!!! (Score:3)
Come on, give him a break. That's the most time Taco's ever given over to spell-checking what he's posting.
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Re:Mr. 7-Up Has A Name!!!! (Score:2)
Bryan R.
Mr. 7-Up Has A Name!!!! (Score:5)
Bryan R.
Bah (Score:1)
No future?? (Score:2)
Re:Mr. 7-Up Has A Name!!!! (Score:1)
Go see Shrek (Score:2)
Re:4 pairs? (Score:1)
Re no of base pairs: it just has to be divisible by two. (If it follows the kind of pattern that life on earth provides.)
I don't know where you got the squares from...
Re:Bah (Score:1)
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rentable. no theater. (Score:1)
So smart and yet so clueless? (Score:1)
It wasn't Julianne Moore's and David Duchovny's characters that went way back. They just met in the movie.
TED LEVINE's characer and David Duchovny's character went way back. They were at the Pentagon together.
(sigh)
Re:Mr. 7-Up Has A Name!!!! (Score:2)
The Slashdot guy's running reference to him as "the 7Up guy" bugged the hell out of me, too.
I also don't trust Mr. Slashdot's reviews either. I'll probably drag my GF to it and I'll probably enjoy the hell out of it.
Re:Mr. 7-Up Has A Name!!!! (Score:2)
Yes, I think Mr. Slashdot has his spelling checker configured to replace every instance of the word "than" with "then".
The sound of one hand clapping (Score:2)
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WOW! (Score:1)
I'd rather read Taco's reviews over Katz's. I try and avoid reading Katz's reviews if I haven't seen the movie yet, since they generally sour the experience for me - even if I enjoy the film. Bastard.
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CAIMLAS
Re:4 pairs? (Score:1)
Re:Product Placement (Score:1)
Re:OT: My geography sucks (Score:1)
Re:Mr. 7-Up Has A Name!!!! (Score:1)
Anal retentive biology correction (Score:2)
Re:Anal retentive biology correction (Score:1)
Re:Anal retentive biology correction correction (Score:2)
Re:Don't expect too much... (Score:2)
Re:Anal retentive biology correction (Score:1)
Re:Product Placement (Score:1)
Re:No future?? (Score:1)
Re:The bottom line... (Score:1)
Don't forget Mad TV (Score:1)
Anal retentive biology correction correction (Score:2)
Re:OT: My geography sucks (Score:3)
Re:Product Placement (Score:1)
Re:Mr. 7-Up Has A Name!!!! (Score:1)
Re:Product Placement? ("Spoilers") (Score:1)
Re:Burgess Shale (Score:1)
Re:Product Placement (Score:2)
What do you call what N611FE did in EWR in 1997 [aol.com]?
I mean, okay, it was landing already, and "any landing you can walk away from is a good landing," but still...
Re:Burgess Shale (Score:3)
Hallucigenia sparsa. The Smithsonian seems to agree with you: http://www.nmnh.si.edu/paleo/shale/phallu.htm [si.edu].
Re:Product Placement? ("Spoilers") (Score:1)
OT: My geography sucks (Score:1)
I swear I sat there looking at the for a while wondering what Taco was doing in the Netherlands (or rather, what he's not doing in the Netherlands).
just one thing (Score:1)
Ever get the impression that your life would make a good sitcom?
Ever follow this to its logical conclusion: that your life is a sitcom?
Legacy of Mr. 7up (Score:1)
Yeah, and I recall seeing him referred to as the make seven up yours guy in reviews for that movie too. In mainstream media magazines, no less. So what's your beef?
Ever get the impression that your life would make a good sitcom?
Ever follow this to its logical conclusion: that your life is a sitcom?
Re:Mr. 7-Up Has A Name!!!! (Score:1)
Re:More classic 'hollywood computers' ... (Score:1)
Re:Julianne Moore fan over here (Score:1)
Re:Bah (Score:1)
Or, a better idea.. how about you quit watching them and let us have our fun.. jeez.. what did he kill your dog or something? Lighten up..
Autograph please? (Score:1)
Can I get your autograph too? (It's for my kid!).
Don't expect too much... (Score:1)
(upon double-checking my spelling I noticed that that was "Perl Harbor". heh.)
"// this is the most hacked, evil, bastardized thing I've ever seen. kjb"
Re:Don't expect too much... (Score:1)
"// this is the most hacked, evil, bastardized thing I've ever seen. kjb"
Re:Product Placement (Score:2)
is this.....is this for REAL? [mikegallay.com]
Julianne Moore fan over here (Score:3)
To be fair, I am going to see this movie just for Julianne - she rules. Her role in Magnolia was a revelation. But it should be clarified, that she does a ton of comic work, and anyone who is interested should check out her biography on imdb.
is this.....is this for REAL? [mikegallay.com]
Re:Burgess Shale (Score:1)
ikanakattara
Re:4 pairs? (Score:1)
Anybody want to explain to me why 10 bases would be better? And how, mathematically, can one end up with 10? Wouldn't a perfect square like 9 or 16 make more sense?
Re:Burgess Shale (Score:1)
(I wonder what Dawkins thinks about the movie).
Re:Julianne Moore fan over here (Score:1)
And the entire "End of the Affair" movie was hilarious...Too bad they were going for drama.
Who needs your "decent CGI and action sequences"? (Score:1)
"Decent CGI and action sequences are available too. Nothing that will warrant awards in this day and age, but it might entertain you for a few minutes."
Sorry, life's too short for crap that "might" entertain me for a few minutes. There is so much good stuff and even great stuff out there, who has time for a half-baked Duchovny CGI vehicle?
yes well (Score:1)
More classic 'hollywood computers' ... (Score:2)
Burgess Shale (Score:1)
(I wonder what Dawkins thinks about the movie).
Re:Mr. 7-Up Has A Name!!!! (Score:1)
Re:4 pairs? (Score:1)
Some people in these threads need to realize that these are the comments that make the un-net saavy say "its all the internet's fault" in response to the social problems that are growing in america.
Re:My review. Ahem. (Score:1)
Re:Product Placement (Score:1)
"Quick, use this Dr. Pepper, which I will throw across this zero-G room as the camera tracks its progress, to find the leak in our ship!"
"Let's drive our Pennzoil-sponsored Mars rover to the other site!"
But the worst was when Gary Sinise and son are sitting in the treehouse at the beginning, and I SWEAR the camera slightly changes position to get a better shot of the Dr. Pepper sitting next to the kid.
Re:Mr. 7-Up Has A Name!!!! (Score:1)
I would not have known whom he was if he had been refered to as Orlando Jones. I know who David Duchovny is though.
By saying the Mr. 7-UP Yours guy. I knew exactly whom he was writing about. Of course, I do agree that it would have been nice to have said something like "Orlando Jones, also known as the 7-UP Yours Guy."
Re:Mr. 7-Up Has A Name!!!! (Score:1)
Re:Anal retentive biology correction (Score:1)
Re:Product Placement (Score:1)
Decent CGI and action sequences are available too. (Score:1)
I loved this movie. You even get to see Mulder's ass.
2001, A Space Oddysey (Score:2)
Wonderful Life is by Steven Gould (Score:1)
Re:Mr. 7-Up Has A Name!!!! (Score:1)
Re:Anal retentive biology correction (Score:1)