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The Almighty Buck Businesses

Fast, the Troubled Fintech Startup, Is Shutting Down (theinformation.com) 22

One-click checkout startup Fast is shutting down entirely and will discontinue its products and brand, The Information reported Tuesday, citing people familiar with the matter. From the report: It's a stunning collapse for a fintech company that had raised $120 million in funding from backers including payments giant Stripe, Index Ventures and Lee Fixel's Addition. Fast has been aiming to transform online shopping by making it easier to check out across a wide range of stores. But after failing to generate more than a sliver of revenue -- and spending wildly on hiring hundreds of employees -- the company was in desperate need of a new investor or a buyer. The company had hired Morgan Stanley to run an auction and explore options. Meanwhile, it had just weeks' worth of cash left to spend. Some Fast engineers will be offered an opportunity to work at Affirm, whose software lets people buy goods and pay for them in installments, according to two other people familiar with the matter. The number of potential job offers couldn't be learned.
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Fast, the Troubled Fintech Startup, Is Shutting Down

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  • by splutty ( 43475 ) on Tuesday April 05, 2022 @01:44PM (#62420046)

    I don't think they know what those words mean. This was completely expected, unfortunately.

    • by GoTeam ( 5042081 )
      It was stunning for the investors. They thought it was a good idea to invest, so you can see why they are stunned. They may also be stunned that they get wet when it rains.
      • by gweihir ( 88907 )

        Indeed. "Blessed are the clueless, for they shall forever be surprised...."

      • It was stunning for the investors. They thought it was a good idea to invest, so you can see why they are stunned. They may also be stunned that they get wet when it rains.

        You can bet they'll be "stunned" the next time it happens.

        And the time after that, too.

        ...the company was in desperate need of a new investor or a buyer.

        Yep, that would totally solve the problem. Not.

        • You can bet they'll be "stunned" the next time it happens.

          You might be "stunned" to know that a normal investment portfolio consist of a mix of high to low risk ventures. Feels good to crap on people that have the money to invest though I'm sure.

          Anyway, they weren't exactly some crazy startup. They were building a streamlined checkout process.

      • They're pinin' for the fjords.

    • by gweihir ( 88907 )

      I don't think they know what those words mean. This was completely expected, unfortunately.

      Well, the "stunning" thing is clearly the cluelessness of the investors...

    • by shanen ( 462549 )

      For what values of "unfortunately" was it unfortunate? Is it like 1 + 1 = 3 for large enough values of one?

      My take is that "fintech" is a suboxymoron for morons. "Financial technology" was already an oxymoron, so there was no reason to reduce it to one word. Today's candidate for a failed joke:

      "Those who can, do. Those who can't play with financial technology."

      Long time since stock markets had any significant linkage to reality. Stock prices aren't even human opinions now and computers don't even have real

      • by splutty ( 43475 )

        The idea as is wasn't bad at all, hence the unfortunately. However when your business depends on spending a lot of money until you manage to convince a lot of people to voluntarily join your club...

        Well.. That almost never goes well.

        And when said business plan is just "The same, but now new with more buzzwords!" that gets incrementally harder.

        • by shanen ( 462549 )

          I'm not sure what "idea" you are referring to, though the definite article indicates you thought it was a clear reference.

          But I am quite skeptical of most economic ideas since Ricardo's "comparative advantage". That was a good one. Since then? Not so much.

  • That was fast.
      I'll get my coat now...

  • who gave these jokers $120 million? Was this somebody's brother in law or something?
    • There is always a bunch of people looking for the next big payday with money to invest and easily impressed by a slick slide deck.
  • If it goes down as fast as its name, it's not a start-up.

  • This is probably apropos of nothing, but here goes:

    Whenever I'm seeking a new job role, and I get a message from some guy looking for someone like me (a software developer) but is crowing about all the funding his company just raised, I simply say, "Gimme some." No, really. You wanna brag about it, then I want some. To paraphrase (quote?) Gandhi, you don't ask, you don't get. (shrug) But in my experience, the real opportunities, the best jobs, those never brag about that.

    Otherwise, why are you telling me? D

To thine own self be true. (If not that, at least make some money.)

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